Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

Fewer Women Marrying in Qatar

This is not a phenomenon unique to Qatar. I remember reading almost the same exact story about black women in America, where black women get educated and black men go to jail. For the guys, being smart in school is a source of ridicule, rather than admiration.

There are similar stories coming out of many countries in the world.

So how do we encourage young men to strive for higher education?

There was a related story in the Peninsula Men, Not Religion, Block Saudi Women on Friday.

Fewer women getting married: Expert
Web posted at: 12/19/2009 2:32:58
Source ::: THE PENINSULA/ By ABDULLAH ABDUL RAHMAN


DOHA: Latest studies suggest that some 30 percent of young Qatari women remain unmarried and divorce in the local community is on an alarming rise, says a prominent Qatari psychologist.

The number of unmarried women is increasing basically due to the fact that more and more females want to pursue higher education and achieve financial independence, said Dr Mozah Al Malki (pictured).

There is a huge gap between Qatari men and women in terms of education. While most women pursue university education, men generally prefer to look for government jobs right after early or secondary education.

And the fact that women are increasingly becoming financially independent due to being highly educated also explains why the incidence of divorce in the community is high.

The other major factor that might be pushing the rate of divorce up is that earlier it was not easy for women in this region to seek divorce from their husbands although the law has always been there in keeping with the basic tenets of Islam which permits a woman to seek ‘khola’ (divorce) on genuine grounds.

“But now the law makes it easier for women to seek divorce,” Al Malki said in remarks to this newspaper yesterday.

Statistics suggest that the rate of divorce in the Qatari community is somewhere around 40 percent — a very high rate indeed, lamented the psychologist who made history when she filed nomination for Central Municipal Council (CMC) elections in March 1999.

Although she lost the poll, she became the first Qatari woman to enter politics which was until then an unchallenged domain of men in this part of the world.

Women remain busy pursuing education and then they land jobs. It, therefore, becomes difficult to get the right match, so most women remain unmarried, she said.

Obviously, a woman who has a PhD would not like to marry an undergraduate or even a simple graduate. This explains why as many as 30 percent young women are unmarried and their number could even go up.

Asked whether marrying educated Muslim expatriates could be an effective solution to this problem, she said: “But such marriages require permission from the interior ministry and it takes time.”

About the increasing rate of divorce, she said many factors were at play. Men picking more than one wife and not treating their wives equally could be one of the factors.

“Men tend to marry more than once simply for pleasure,” she said. Polygamous men do not take marriage and family seriously.

A kind of monotony sets in marriages that are 10 to 15 years old. Couples should think of innovative ways to break this monotony and make a fresh start in life.

“They should, for example, visit the same hotel they were in for honeymoon,” she said. “Such things prove effective in saving troubled marriages, and I have written extensively about it,” Al Malki said.

December 20, 2009 - Posted by | Africa, Cultural, Doha, Education, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Living Conditions, Marriage, Mating Behavior, Middle East, Qatar, Relationships, Saudi Arabia, Social Issues, Values, Women's Issues, Work Related Issues

10 Comments »

  1. what these men SHOULD do is submit to the fairer, more driven and educated sex. Maybe then, emphasis on maybe, arabs wouldn’t be such a stagnant ethnicity. Anthropology in england has just provoked me even more lol. btw, ive passed 😀

    Mrm's avatar Comment by Mrm | December 20, 2009 | Reply

  2. Wiooooooo HOOOOO, MRM! Cap and Gown time! Woooooo HOOOOOOOO. So do we call you Master? Mistress? Doctor? LLLOOOLLL! Anthropologist Mrm? I am so happy and so proud of you I could dance for joy. 🙂

    intlxpatr's avatar Comment by intlxpatr | December 20, 2009 | Reply

  3. Educated, financially independent women refuse to marry losers. Ladies, don’t be a statistic! Snatch a man while you can! News at eleven.

    Two factors redeem this story:
    1) No mention of women required to lower their standards.
    2) No mention of the word spinster.

    I hate these stories with the fire of 70,000 burning suns. Wonky statistics make me want to poke freshly sharpened pencils in my eye.

    G's avatar Comment by G | December 21, 2009 | Reply

  4. G, I see it from a different point of view. Education helps everybody. Girls are grabbing the opportunity and getting ahead. So what’s with the guys? How do we encourage the young men to aspire to higher education for themselves?

    And, as I see it, in the Gulf, the situation is complicated by the nationality issues – the men can marry out, but the women can’t, or they can but then their kids don’t get the benefits of citizenship. It eliminates a lot of suitable mates.

    BTW, don’t read the article, or you will feel genuinely ill. Her prescription for a failing marriage is to visit the hotel where you had your honeymoon. I’d say – try something new!

    intlxpatr's avatar Comment by intlxpatr | December 21, 2009 | Reply

  5. I think we’re facing very similar issues in Kuwait. I really don’t know why it seems that men are lagging behind the women in terms of getting a better education. Maybe they’re too hurried to get into the job market because they’re in a rush to be making their own money?

    Aside from that, I don’t know how the law was before but I like that it’s making it easier for women to initiate the divorce. Some men blackmail their wives with that or just leave her hanging while they’re separated so that she can’t marry anyone else.

    1001Nights's avatar Comment by 1001Nights | December 22, 2009 | Reply

  6. […] here: Fewer Women Marrying in Qatar « Here There and Everywhere Share and […]

    Pingback by Fewer Women Marrying in Qatar « Here There and Everywhere | Drakz News Station | December 22, 2009 | Reply

  7. 1001, I can understand the women making use of the opportunity to further their education – to me, it is a partnership issue, if I were a man, I would want to be married to someone who could help take care of the family financially if anything were to happen to my earning power. Living in these times, when financial bubbles burst and jobs disappear, it’s like insurance.

    Plus, I think it is more interesting in a long term relationship to be married to someone with whom you can talk with about complex ideas and situations, bounce ideas back and forth as the children are howling and throwing peas, LLOOLL.

    What I don’t understand is why FEWER young men are seeking higher education. I think in terms of percentages, Kuwait is probably ahead of Qatar, but Qatar is catching up with the foundation of Education City, where many Qatari young people can get a western university education from a respectable university without leaving Qatar. So why the short sighted approach, not continuing education?

    It may be that many young men believe the sooner they start working, the sooner they can get married, and start a family, and it may be that these less educated young guys are choosing less educated gals. (?)

    I agree with you about the divorce laws. Fair is fair. When men can divorce easily, and for women it is difficult, and then there are all those custody imbalances, it is definitely an oppressive situation for a woman. I’m surprised more Kuwaiti and Qatteri women aren’t studying to be lawyers!

    intlxpatr's avatar Comment by intlxpatr | December 22, 2009 | Reply

  8. “I think it is more interesting in a long term relationship to be married to someone with whom you can talk with about complex ideas and situations”. That makes sense to me and it’s totally inline with what I would want. The thing is happiness comes in different forms for different people and I’m sure some men and even some women simply don’t derive much joy from having a spouse with whom they can converse on serious matters.

    1001Nights's avatar Comment by 1001Nights | December 24, 2009 | Reply

  9. You’re probably right about that. I think it’s also true in my culture. 🙂

    intlxpatr's avatar Comment by intlxpatr | December 24, 2009 | Reply

  10. government jobs are still the best when it comes to job security `;~

    Rhinoplasty :'s avatar Comment by Rhinoplasty : | October 28, 2010 | Reply


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