Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

A Different Kind of Sadly Hilarious

I was just checking if there might be anything on TV tonight worth watching, and I got caught watching – in horror and fascination – Rock Pop and Do-Wop, on National Public Television.

Horrified – because these 60’s and 70’s bands are playing to full concert houses full of people who look OLD like my parents – oh wait – they look like me! Horrors! The music still makes me feel like a teenager! All these people in the audience are looking like true believers, singing along with the songs, getting up and dancing, like they can’t resist the music. No dignity! They are acting like teenagers! Horrors! I still know all the words, even to songs I don’t even remember any more, once they play the first few notes, I know all the words!

Hilarious, because these acts have to strain a little to hit all the notes, but most of them have had eye-lifts, and some of them can even still dance. They can still rock the songs, and they are totally wowing the audience. The hair styles – so awful they are almost cool again. It’s just wrong to have OLD people singing these young love songs.

Poison Ivy! One Fine Day! Blue Moon! I Only Have Eyes for You! Step-by-Step! This Magic Moment! Only You! Twilight Time! The Great Pretender! (Holy Smokes!The audience is going crazy!)

The costumes – oh my heavens. I remember when my high school BF was in a band and my father was horrified by his turquoise blue band jacket, and now . . . I can sort of see what he meant. Pretty awful, but oh – what fun. I remember the fights over whether we should be listening to this music, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the bad boys of rock. They all look so innocent a hundred years later.

There is a part of me that is still 12 years old, listening to this music, and there is a part of me watching me watch the program that is horrified at my fascination.

June 9, 2011 Posted by | Aging, Cultural, Entertainment, Generational, Music | , , , | 2 Comments

Sadly Hilarious

Peaches, sweet, juicy peaches are coming into season, and I couldn’t resist making up a peach crisp for a lunch I am giving today. Since I was making one, I made several, some smaller ones to give away. Dropped one off with a friend, then went by to see our son and his wife and Baby Q, the Happy Baby.

As I walked in, Happy Baby came running, screeching happy sounds, so happy to see . . . me? No, he ran right by me, did not want my hug, he was looking for AdventureMan. As I stood with my arms open to hug him, he was desperately looking out the window, looking for the fun guy who really matters. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry; I wanted that hug all for myself, but it is truly hilarious how much he loves AdventureMan, and how he watched and watched and watched out the window, hoping he was coming, too. The longer he watched, the funnier it got.

Later in the evening, we both went by, so Happy Baby got some time with his “Ga Ga”and then, guess what, I also got my hug once he had had his special time with his Grandpa. 🙂

June 9, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Aging, Family Issues, Pensacola | 2 Comments

Dancing and Drinks

Yesterday was our 38 year wedding anniversary, and it was a great day. Last night, we went for dancing and drinks.

LOL.

Our dance class at the YMCA . . . and this month we started the waltz, which we already know how to do, but now we are learning some extras, like turns. It is barely air conditioned in the gym, if at all, so dancing is EXERCISE in the heat we are experiencing – record highs – this year.

And drinks – don’t McDonald’s smoothies count? I totally love the Wild Berry, and I try to tell myself it might even be healthy, it might even have berries, and I try not to think about the sugar. It is only now and then I have one, AdventureMan too, so our anniversary was celebrated in style. Our style, LOL, not exactly the high life, but it works for us.

June 8, 2011 Posted by | Aging, Cold Drinks, Cultural, Entertainment, Exercise, ExPat Life, Health Issues, Living Conditions, Marriage, Pensacola | 10 Comments

The Church Brew Pub and Downtown Pittsburgh

Now this is courage. In a strange town, one set of friends says they know a great place for lunch, and we need to come through this tunnel to come out for a great view of Pittsburgh. And, they volunteer to be the lead drivers. That takes courage.

It all went beautifully. We made all the right entrances and exits, and while our route was a little eccentric, so as to take advantage of a particular view, we got where we intended to go, wooo hoooo.

Here are some views of downtown Pittsburgh:


Our goal for lunch was the Church Brew Works, where these friends had eaten a few days before with our Doha-Pittsburgh friends.

It’s an old Catholic church, de-consecrated, de-sanctified, now a restaurant and micro-brewery.

Here’s what you see when you enter:

Here’s brewery works, in the old Sanctuary:

Here’s the indoor dining area:

And here is where you can eat outside, in the hops garden, with a feel a lot like Germany:

This is the bar area and souvenier sales:

The food was pretty good, not particularly memorable, but that is often the case where the setting takes precedence over everything else. One set of friends had the beer sampler, which they shared: 🙂

It was another of those great days. It didn’t matter where we went or what we ate, what mattered was doing it together.

June 7, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Arts & Handicrafts, Cold Drinks, Cultural, Eating Out, ExPat Life, Friends & Friendship, Travel | , | 12 Comments

Meds

I’m going to be one of those cantankerous people who gripe about their medications. I have one friend, God bless her, who when I was feeling depressed because I was going to have to take a daily medication said “You’ve managed to put it off this long??” She always knows just what to say. Somehow, I guess I had hoped for a miracle, I was going to be a person who never had to take anything. It hurt my pride more than anything else to be told that I might live as long, but the quality of my life could be dramatically effected. That made an impression on me.

As retired military, we can get some medications for ‘free.’ So last week, when my prescription had about five pills left, I called in for a refill. It was all automated, so there was no one I could talk with, and the automated voice told me my refill would be ready for pick-up today. Meanwhile, I had five pills, and seven nights to get through.

The next day I went to the Navy Hospital, where the clerk told me that they gave me seven days worth of my medication to get me through to when I could pick up.

This morning, we got there early, 8:30, and it wasn’t open until nine, so we did some commissary shopping, then went back – only forty minutes later, but the line was 19 people long, people older than me, standing in line outside in temperatures in the 90’s (F) and steamy. Almost every other person had a problem. “Sir, we don’t even see your name in the system” they say to one. “Sir, your medication just came in; there was a shortage and we won’t have it ready for you for another couple hours.” “Sir, that medication isn’t available, can you come back in two weeks?”

When my turn came, they told me my prescription had already been refilled, and I could not get another refill until the end of the month. Indeed, when I looked at the bottle the hospital had given me, it was a full refill, but I didn’t know that.

To get this free medication is a lot of work. For only a small amount more, we can have it mailed to our home address. I am thinking that might work better for me.

June 6, 2011 Posted by | Customer Service, Family Issues, Health Issues, Living Conditions, Pensacola, Weather | 3 Comments

Listmaker

“Why are you smiling?” AdventureMan asked as he read the Sunday paper on our bed, the ceiling fan whirling madly to cool him down after his post-Church yard work – feeding the birds, shoveling up all the birdseed hulls, putting recycle materials into the compost bin.

I was doing something I do only rarely, changing purses. At the last minute, all in navy, I decided to do the navy purse instead of the tan. Now, back home, I was re-transfering all the important things, and checking pockets for stuff that accumulates and needs to be thrown away.

“I found a list,” I began. “It says:

fruit cake
kick board
book
peanut brittle
photos in frames
calendar
soap”

He laughed. “I know exactly what that was, “he remembered, “my Christmas box.”

More specifically, my tag on the outside of the box reminding me of what was inside when I had to affix a customs tag to send the box to hubby in Kuwait. These days, as I send boxes, I (mostly) no longer have to fiddle with customs tags or leaving the box open until I get to the post office so that customs officers can affirm what I included in the box. Every time I send a box, still, I think of those customs tags and give thanks not to have to do those irksome little steps.

I keep my lists now, in a folder marked, predictably,

    To Do Lists

This one goes in there. On days when I feel bad about myself, or overwhelmed, I can look at my to-do lists and have a record that my time was not mis-spent. I can see all the little chores and fix-it projects we have finished, all the dinners we have done, house guests we have had . . . These little to-do lists keep track of the little things you do that take up so much time, and then at the end of the year, you ask yourself “where did the time go.” These help me know that I didn’t waste the time, I used the time, a little here, a little there, to bring order out of chaos in our daily existence, to brighten a life, maybe to help others, or to meet a goal I have already forgotten.

Some of the lists, like the moving lists, remind me of God’s gracious hand in helping me to do the things I’ve had to do, and could never have managed without his help. When I read some of them, I almost laugh out loud thinking “I did all that??”

It also reminds me how very happy I am to have AdventureMan back home with me, not far away at Christmas time. 🙂

June 6, 2011 Posted by | Character, Cultural, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Home Improvements, Living Conditions, Marketing, Moving, Pensacola, Shopping, Values | 2 Comments

Elderly Women Prime Targets for Cons

Found this fascinating article this morning on AOL News/finance There was a time when I worked with transitional homeless people, helping them to find ways to re-enter the mainstream. A percentage of them didn’t want to enter the mainstream, they didn’t like rules, and they were looking for an easier way. One of the paths was by being part of the elder-worker force. I would watch them take a job and then work their way into a position of dominance in an elderly person’s life. Partly, the elderly were lonely, and thrived on the new attention, and interpreted it as caring.

Then would come the sob stories. School starting and not enough money to buy shoes and books for the children. A broken-down car, and funds needed to get it fixed so she can get to her job. Once it starts, it never ends.

The key to prevention is staying engaged with friends, neighbors and family who are paying attention, and can give perspective to this new relationship. The one question I asked is “if there were not money involved, would this relationship exist?”

Elder Abuse: How to Protect Grandma From Con Men and Thieves
By Sheryl Nance-Nash Posted 9:00AM 06/03/11 Retirement, People, MetLife

See full article from DailyFinance: http://srph.it/lXHooJ


Who would pick the pocket of your grandma or grandpa? Apparently, any number of people. Older Americans are losing $2.9 billion annually to elder financial abuse, a 12% increase from the $2.6 billion estimated in 2008, according to The MetLife Study of Elder Financial Abuse: Crimes of Occasion, Desperation, and Predation Against America’s Elders, released Wednesday.

According to the study, 51% of these abusers are strangers, but 34% of the perpetrators were family, friends and neighbors. As for “trusted advisers,” exploitation from the business sector accounted for 12% of reported cases. Medicare and Medicaid fraud accounts for 4% of reported cases. As a subset, the percentage of robberies and crimes classified as “scams perpetrated by strangers” increased from 9% to 28% from 2008 to 2010.

Who’s on the top of the target list? Women. The study, produced by the MetLife (MET) Mature Market Institute in collaboration with the National Committee for the Prevention of Elder Abuse and the Center for Gerontology at Virginia Polytechnic Institute, shows women were nearly twice as likely to be victims of elder financial abuse as men.

Also prime for the picking were people between the ages of 80 and 89 who lived alone and required some help with either health care or home maintenance. Primarily, men were the menace: Nearly 60% of perpetrators were males, mostly between ages 30 and 59.

Predators lie in wait, watching: In the most common scenarios, strangers targeted victims who were out shopping, driving or managing the financial affairs, and often looked for particular flags of vulnerability like handicapped tags on cars, canes or displays of confusion. Crimes included cons, purse snatchings and associated physical assaults.

But that even those closest to an elderly person can give in to temptation or desperation. In cases involving a person known to the victim, trusted helpers like caretakers, handymen, friends, “sweethearts,” children, lawyers and others seized upon opportunities to forge checks, steal credit cards, pilfer bank accounts, transfer assets and generally decimate elders’ finances, the study revealed. The holidays apparently bring out the worst in people: At that time of year, overall dollar losses due to family and friends were higher than any other category.

Married to the Con Job

People can get quite creative with abuse. One unusual method — caregivers secretly marrying their elderly charges, says Susan Slater-Jansen, an attorney at Kurzman Eisenberg Corbin & Lever.

There have been numerous lawsuits over cases in which a caregiver married a mentally incapacitated older patient and the patient’s family didn’t learn about it until after the patient had died. Once a person is dead, it’s too late — in all but three states, you can’t void a marriage if one spouse has died, says Slater-Jansen. To help lower the odds of such a thing happening to your parent, adult children should make sure they receive duplicate monthly statements from all bank and brokerage accounts; install nanny cams; carefully and thoroughly check references for all caregivers; visit parents often, both while the caregiver is there and when they are not; and discuss with your parents the treatment they are receiving from caregivers.

If you discover such a fraudulent marriage has taken place, act quickly to get it annulled.

After the parent dies, heirs can sue to recover money from the “spouse.” More and more, courts have found ways to deny spouses if the marriage was fraudulent, says Slater-Jansen.

“The most flagrant abuse is perpetrated on the elder by the hired caregiver, neighbor, or ‘new’ friend,” warns Karen Maarse Fitzgerald, a principal in her own elder law practice. “A simple power of attorney signed by the elder can give to the “agent” broad and sweeping powers over the elder’s life savings. I have seen bank accounts drained within days, the money and perpetrator vanishing to another country.”

Protection Yourself and Your Relatives

The worst forms of elder abuse go beyond money: There can be physical abuse and sexual violence as well. “The vigilance of friends and family can help protect elders from those who are predatory, which may, unfortunately, include strangers or even other loved ones,” said Sandra Timmermann, Ed.D., director of the MetLife Mature Market Institute, in a prepared statement.

What can the elderly do to protect themselves? Among the guidance offered by the report’s authors:

“Stay active and engage with others; socialize with your family members and friends. Avoid isolation, as it can lead to loneliness, depression, and make you more vulnerable to financial abuse or exploitation.”

“Use direct deposit for Social Security and other payments to prevent mail theft. Sign your own checks whenever possible.”

“Stay organized and keep important papers and legal documents in a safe, secure location.”

“Review your legal documents (i.e., wills, trusts, and power of attorney), as well as other important documents (i.e., insurance policies) at least annually, to make certain they continue to represent your wishes.”

Ted Sarenski, who chairs the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants’ Elder Planning Task Force, would add to that list. His tips:

Subscribe to national and state Do Not Call lists;

Keep Social Security cards in a safe place;

Remove mail promptly from the mailbox;

Shred all confidential and financial information prior to discarding.

“Consider allowing the bank to send a duplicate copy of your bank statement to a trusted family member,” advises attorney Andrew Stoltmann, who has a large client base of seniors. “Usually, most financial elder exploitation cases are only reported or discovered six to 12 months after the initial losses have occurred.”

Elders whose sight is failing are at even greater risk because they may rely upon the very person who is stealing from them to ensure that their financial transactions are in order, says Stoltmann. “An independent pair of eyes that is able to review bank statements every 30 days will be able to catch suspicious activities in the early stages and cut it off. This is crucial.”

Advance Planning Can Help Dodge Dangers

When you are the responsible caregiver, know too, that your prudence can go a long way in preventing financial abuse.

Have some tough conversations. You need to know whether there is a will or a durable power of attorney, and where such documents are. Does your parent have a living will? If so, does it give you clarity about what your loved one’s wishes are? A health care power of attorney would permit a trusted individual make medical decisions if your elderly relative was unable to.

It’s important not to wait until the eleventh hour to have these talks. Ideally, those documents should be drawn up when your relative is of sound mind and body. It’s not a bad idea either, to have a trusted adviser, not only know where the documents are kept, but be able to get to them if needed.

Beware of the appearance on the scene of the “trusted new friend.” If mom and dad have a neighbor, caregiver or other outsider who is suddenly their best pal, running errands, going to the bank, and generally being around all the time when they never were before, it can be a warning sign that someone is taking advantage, warns Sarenski.

“Elder financial abuse invariably results in losses of human rights and dignity,” said Karen A. Roberto, Ph.D., director of the Center for Gerontology, at Virginia Polytechnic Institute. ” Despite growing public awareness from a parade of high-profile financial abuse victims, it remains under reported, under-recognized, and under-prosecuted. The 2010 Passage of the Elder Justice Act may bring more attention and resources to this crime leading to prevention among the expanding older population.”

The bottom line, says Maarse Fitzgerald: “Protect elders from isolation, which allows the perpetrators to take control of our elder’s lives.”

See full article from DailyFinance: http://srph.it/lXHooJ

June 5, 2011 Posted by | Aging, Community, Crime, Customer Service, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Health Issues, Mating Behavior, Relationships, Scams, Social Issues | 2 Comments

Walking in Saxonburg, Pennsylvania

You know we love to walk, and Saxonburg has a great Main Street, perfect for walking. I don’t know what other seasons are like here, but oh! The flowers of spring! I was in heaven:


I loved the cobbled sidewalks, and the churches, and the houses:


Even better with a dog 🙂

June 5, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Beauty, Road Trips, Travel | , , | Leave a comment

Restaurant Hotel Saxonburg, Saxonburg, Pennsylvania

How lucky can you get? Just next door to the Mainstay in Saxonburg is the Hote Saxonburg, which has a restaurant, and that restaurant has a menu full of good choices. We ate lunch there, two days in a row. We thought the food was super good, but it may also have to do with eating meals with good friends; everything just tastes good when you are laughing and having fun.

Inside, the owner told us when renovating, they found these old beams, and the original straw and wattle construction, and they decided to leave it – it really adds to the interior atmoshpere:

The food was really good, and the restaurant staff was very accomodating about our picky style of ordering. They had two sandwiches, a Reuben, made with corned beef and sauerkraut, and a Rachel, made with turkey breast and cold slaw. I asked if I could have the Reuben, but made with turkey breast, and they did it as if it were no inconvenience at all. I love it when a restaurant treats my requests with respect, instead of huffing and puffing about how no, it isn’t possible.

Before we started, we ordered cups of the Lobster Bisque, which I am sad to say was so delicious that we ate it all up before even thinking about taking a photo.

My Reuben/Rachel:

What you can’t see much of on our plates is the green beans with pecans; you can’t see them because they disappeared so fast. As good as our meals were, those green beans with pecans were divine.

The Ahi Nicoise Salad (YUM!):

The Pork Barbecue (AdventureMan)

A shrimp and fish dish:

One big guy among us ordered both the spinach salad and the sausage sandwich, and ate every bite, they were both so delicious:

The food was so good, we could only drink coffee afterwards, no room for dessert!

June 4, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Eating Out, ExPat Life, Food, Living Conditions, Local Lore, Road Trips, Travel | , , | Leave a comment

Hilarious Qadaffi E-mail

Those who come by here regularly know that I have a niece who is not only a professor of Arabic culture and studies, but is also beautiful and funny and adventerous. I had no idea she was so well connected, LOL. Thank you, Little Diamond, for contributing this wonderful scam e-mail to the HT&E collection. Read and weep!

My name is Saif Al Islam Gaddafi, the son of the present president of Libya. I am contacting you for an urgent assistance.

As you can read and see in the media, my family is presently undergoing tough time in the hand of the masses due to his long stay in power as the president of Libya for over 40 years now. Although there is no way you can satisfy human being, my father has done so many things to better the life of our people unfortunately they never appreciated his effort instead it resulted in calling my family bad names.

The International community has reached a resolution for immediate seizure of our assets both in US and the UK which the have already done and many other sanctions but it can’t affect our financial statue in the world. But as you can not predict tomorrow the say that is while I decided to reach you for this assistant hoping it will be top secret and you should avoid the media

I want to request your humble assistance to receive a total sum of €22m.
I will not give you details of the fund now because of security reasons but just have in mind that the fund exit in one of the African countries.

You will receive this fund directly and keep it safe or invest it in any business of yours till this saga is over then I will get back to you on how the fund or profit will be shared. By the special grace of Allah nothing will happen to me.

If you are ready and will keep it top secret and avoid the media contact this email address (aarifqasif@hotmail.com ) the details of where the fund exit and how it will be transferred will be made known t

I know you may have little fear on you but it is risk free.

I know you will be in hurry to reply me but due to what my family is facing now and security reasons I will not be responding ! ! ! ! ! ! !.
All you need to do is to contact my representative with the email given to you and tell him that you received an email from Saif Al Islam Gaddafi and that you are willing to receive the fund.

Assalamu ‘alaikum
Saif Al Islam Gaddafi

Little Diamond, that’s the best laugh I’ve had all day. 😀

June 3, 2011 Posted by | Africa, Fund Raising, Scams | 7 Comments