Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

Touched the Hem of His Garment

Today’s meditation from Forward Day by Day touches on one of my very favorite stories – and its opposite. It’s all about the power of belief. The woman, suffering from bleeding, would have lived a terrible life, considered unclean, untouchable, and trying everything to be cured without success. Just a touch – one touch – and her illness is gone. Jesus is astonished and tells her that her faith has made her well.

In contrast, the people in his own village are skeptical. How can good ole Jesus, son of Mary and that carpenter, how can he be anything special? In the face of such callous disbelief, Jesus can do little.

SATURDAY, July 27

Mark 6:1-13. And he could do no deed of power there, except that he laid his hands on a few sick people and cured them.

What a contrast, in just a few verses. Yesterday the bleeding woman merely touched Jesus’ garment, and Jesus’ power streamed into her. Today he is home, and those who watched him grow up ask, “Just who do you think you are?” and the Son of God is stopped in his tracks, like Superman when he is exposed to kryptonite.
My field education rector preached on this passage a year ago, and I was spellbound by his ending. He asked, “If Jesus came to All Saints, would he be able to do deeds of power?” Then the rector got even more personal, asking, “If Jesus came to you, would he be able to deeds of power?”

Oh, how I hope so. I’m not sure how to have the faith that allows Jesus to perform deeds of power, but I can see what kind of behavior does. It is hopeful, brave actions that seem to open the way for Jesus to work; and it is arrogant, fear-based behavior that seems to block the way.

Lord, teach us not to fear the change you bring. Teach us to reach out to touch your garment.

When my Mother was still living on her own, there was a revolving guest room, and my sister left a CD for me there, as she departed and I arrived, which contained the song above. I want it sung at my funeral. It is a succinct statement of faith; it is the song of the bleeding woman who believes and is cured, and nothing is ever the same.

July 27, 2013 Posted by | Aging, Arts & Handicrafts, Beauty, Character, Community, Cross Cultural, Cultural, Experiment, Faith, Health Issues, Lectionary Readings, Living Conditions, Spiritual, Values | Leave a comment

Pakistan’s Swat Valley Women Fight Back with Jirga

I love this. Women are using technology – and the traditional system – to persist in seeking justice for women who are often little more than slaves to their husband.

From BBC News:

_68946917_screenshot2013-07-24at17.47.06
Tahira

Women in Pakistan’s Swat valley are making history, and perhaps some powerful enemies, by convening an all-female jirga, a forum for resolving disputes usually reserved for men. Some readers may find details of this report by the BBC’s Orla Guerin disturbing.

Tahira was denied justice in life, but she continues to plead for it in death – thanks to a grainy recording on a mobile phone.

As she lay dying last year the young Pakistan wife and mother made a statement for use in court.

In the shaky amateur video, she named her tormentors, and said they should burn like she did.

Tahira was married off at the age of 12 and died last year following a suspected acid attack

Tahira’s flesh was singed on 35% of her body, following a suspected acid attack. Her speech was laboured and her voice was hoarse, but she was determined to give her account of the attack, even as her flesh was falling off her bones.

“I told her you must speak up and tell us what happened,” her mother Jan Bano said, dabbed her tears with her white headscarf. “And she was talking until her last breath.”

Tahira’s husband, mother-in-law, and father-in-law were acquitted this month of attacking her with acid. Her mother plans to appeal against that verdict, with help from a new ally – Pakistan’s first female jirga.

Under the traditional – and controversial – jirga system, elders gather to settle disputes. Until now this parallel justice system has been men-only, and rulings have often discriminated against women. The new all-women jirga, which has about 25 members, aims to deliver its own brand of justice.

It has been established in an unlikely setting – the scenic but conservative Swat valley, formerly under the control of the Pakistan Taliban. We sat in on one of its sessions in a sparsely furnished front room. Women crowded in, sitting in a circle on the floor, many with children at their feet. Most wore headscarves, and a few were concealed in burqas.

Probing injustice
For more than an hour they discussed a land dispute, problems with the water supply, unpaid salaries, and murder. The only man in the room was a local lawyer, Suhail Sultan. He was giving legal advice to jirga members including Jan Bano who he represents.

“In your case the police is the bad guy,” he told her. “They are the biggest enemy. ” He claims the police were bribed by the accused, and were reluctant to investigate the case properly.

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The jirga tackled land disputes, water supplies, and murder

The jirga is making history, and perhaps making enemies. In Swat, as in many parts of Pakistan, men make the key decisions – like whether or not their daughters go to school, when they marry, and who they marry. And oppression starts early. Tahira was married off at just 12 years old, to a middle-aged man.

“Our society is a male-dominated society, and our men treat our women like slaves,” said the jirga founder, Tabassum Adnan. “They don’t give them their rights and they consider them their property. Our society doesn’t think we have the right to live our own lives.”

This chatty social activist, and mother of four, knows that challenging culture and tradition comes with risks. “Maybe I could be killed,” she said, “anything could happen. But I have to fight. I am not going to stop.”

They glued [my daughter’s] mouth and eyes closed. Just her face was left, the rest was flesh and broken bones”

Taj Mehal
As we spoke in a sun-baked courtyard Tabassum got a disturbing phone call. “I have just been told that the body of another girl has been found, ” she said. ” Her husband shot her.” She plans to investigate the case, and push the authorities to act.

“Before my jirga women have always been ignored by the police and by justice, but not now. My jirga has done a lot for women,” she said.

There was agreement from Taj Mehal, a bereaved mother with a careworn face, sitting across the courtyard on a woven bed.

Her beloved daughter Nurina was tortured to death in May.

“They broke her arm in three places, and they strangled her,” she told me, putting her hands to her own throat to mimic the action. “They broke her collarbone. They glued her mouth and eyes closed. Just her face was left, the rest was flesh and broken bones.”

She speaks of her daughter’s suffering with a steady voice, but grief is wrapped around her, like a heavy shawl.

“When I looked at her, it was like a piece was pulled out of my heart,” she said. “I was turned to stone. I see her face in front of my eyes. I miss her laughter.”

Women are a rare sight on the streets of Mingora
Nurina’s husband, and his parents, have now been charged with her murder, but her mother says that initially the courts took no interest.

“Whenever we brought applications to the judge he would tear them up and throw them away,” she said. “Now our voice is being heard, because of the jirga. Now we will get justice. Before the jirga husbands could do whatever they wanted to their wives.”

Women are little seen or heard on the bustling streets of Mingora, the biggest city in Swat. Rickshaw taxis dart past small shops selling medicines, and hardware supplies.

There are stalls weighed down with mangoes, and vendors dropping dough into boiling oil to make sugar-laden treats. Most of the shoppers are men.

‘No justice’ at jirgas
When we asked some of the local men their views on the women’s jirga, the results were surprising. Most backed the women.

“It’s a very good thing,” said one fruit seller, “women should know about their rights like men do, and they should be given their rights.”

Another said: “The jirga is good because now finally women have someone to champion their cause.”

The response from the local male jirga was less surprising. They were dismissive, saying the women have no power to enforce their decisions.

Most local men who spoke to the BBC expressed support for the women’s initiative

That view was echoed by the prominent Pakistani human rights activist Tahira Abdullah. “I don’t see it as more than a gimmick,” she said. “Who is going to listen to these women? The men with the Kalashnikovs? The Taliban who are anti-women? The patriarchal culture that we have?”

Ms Abdullah wants jirgas stopped whether male or female. “The jirga system is totally illegal, and has been declared illegal by the Supreme Court of Pakistan. It can never be just. There are several extremely notorious cases where we have noticed that women do not get justice from jirgas, neither do non-Muslims.”

One of those cases took place last year in a remote region of northern Pakistan where a jirga allegedly ordered the killing of five women – and two men – for defying local customs by singing and dancing together at a wedding.

And there are regular reports of jirgas decreeing that women and young girls be handed over from one family to another to settle disputes.

But for some, like Jan Bano, the women’s jirga is bringing hope. Every day she climbs a steep hill to visit Tahira’s grave, and pray for the daughter whose voice has still not her heard. Her video recording was not played in court.

July 26, 2013 Posted by | Community, Counter-terrorism, Cultural, Family Issues, Law and Order, Living Conditions, Marriage, Mating Behavior, Pakistan, Political Issues, Relationships, Social Issues, Women's Issues | , , , , | Leave a comment

Yemeni Girl Escapes Child Marriage

This little girl is lucky; she has a sympathetic uncle who protected her when her own mother, twice, tried to sell her into marriage.

She is an amazingly articulate and resourceful little girl. I look forward to seeing the woman she grows into, safe under her uncle’s care. I love it that he convinced one prospective husband that she was not modest enough to be his bride 🙂

This is from AOL/Huffpost

In a bone-chilling three minutes, a young girl who evaded child marriage tells the world that she would “rather die,” than be forced to undergo an arranged marriage.

After learning that her parents had plans to marry her off to a wealthy suitor, brave Nada al-Ahdal of Yemen risked her life and fled to the refuge of her uncle. The precocious little girl, who saw how her teenage aunt took her own life after being abused in an arranged marriage, shared in a harrowing translated video the cruelty of the child bride practice.

“I would have had no life, no education. Don’t they have any compassion?,” Nada asks. “I’m better off dead. I’d rather die [than be forced into a marriage].”

According to NOW News, Nada’s uncle, Abdel Salam al-Ahdal, a montage and graphics technician at a TV station, has protected his niece from being married off twice. Nada’s parents first accepted an offer from a wealthy expatriate, but al-Ahdel intervened and told the prospective groom that Nada was not nearly modest enough for him, in order to “scare him off.”

“When I heard about the groom, I panicked,” he told NOW. “Nada was not even 11 years old; she was exactly 10 years and 3 months. I could not allow her to be married off and have her future destroyed.”

When Nada’s mother tried once again to marry off her daughter against her will, Nada — despite threats that she could be killed — fled to her uncle’s once more, and filed a complaint with the police. She’ll now be living with al-Ahdal permanently.

But such forced marriages, like Nada’s, are on the rise across the globe.

According to a World Vision study released in March, more child brides are being led into arranged marriages due to an increase in global poverty and crises. Parents who live in fear of natural disasters, political instability and financial ruin look to arranged marriages as a way to save their struggling families.

Every day, 39,000 girls, younger than 18, will marry, according to the World Health Organization.

“Women have no rights to give an opinion in the family,” Humaiya, a 16-year-old from Bangladesh who managed to escape marriage, told The Huffington Post in March. “My father didn’t listen.”

Nada, whose video on YouTube has already garnered more than 2 million hits, hopes that the world will hear her message loud and clear.

“They have killed our dreams. They have killed everything inside us,” Nada said in the video. “This is no upbringing. This is criminal, simply criminal.”

July 23, 2013 Posted by | Character, Circle of Life and Death, Community, Cross Cultural, Cultural, Financial Issues, Living Conditions, Marriage, Mating Behavior | , | Leave a comment

Flashing Lights to Warn of Speed Trap: Free Speech?

I’ve done it – warned other drivers of a speed trap ahead. And I have benefited from other drivers warning me. And I am fully aware that for a law and order kind of girl, that is contradictory behavior. So the question is . . . are we allowed?

From AOL Auto News:

When Michael Elli of Missouri flashed his headlights to warn other drivers of an upcoming speed trap in Ellisville Mo. he didn’t think he was doing anything illegal.

After he received a ticket for obstruction of justice, which carried a $1,000 fine, he fought back, saying the warning was protected free speech. Eventually prosecutors in Missouri dropped the charges, but now Elli and the American

“Those who use their First Amendment rights to warn others to drive cautiously should not be punished for their message,” said Tony Rothert, legal director of the ACLU-EM. “After all, the purpose of traffic laws is to promote safety, not generate revenue.”

Is flashing your headlights protected free speech? It depends on where in the U.S. you are. Florida, Utah and Tennessee, Ohio, New Jersey and Pennsylvania have all deemed that warning other drivers with a flicker of your high beams is protected by the first amendment of the U.S. Constitution. Alaska and Arizona have laws strictly forbid headlight flashing in any situation.

July 21, 2013 Posted by | Bureaucracy, Civility, Community, Crime, Interconnected, Law and Order, Living Conditions, Safety, Values | Leave a comment

Dubai’s Weight Loss Challenge: 1 Gram Gold Per Kilo Lost

AdventureMan called as I was booting up the laptop. “Did you hear that?” he exclaimed!
“I’m booting up now,” I laughed.
“What an opportunity for a scam!” he continued.
“Yes, like who does the official weigh in? Can they tell Fatma from Jamila in their abayas and niqab? Does this apply only to Emiratis, or also to guest-workers? Can they tell one laborer from another as they exchange cards?
In truth, paying people to lose weight works. I don’t know how well people are able to keep the weight off; that is always the big problem, no matter what the diet plan. Unless you commit to long term changes in the way you think about food and life-style activities, the weight is hard to keep off long term. But BIG BRAVO to Dubai for this inventive and bold challenge. 🙂
fat

From Arab News

DUBAI: KT ABDURABB

Thursday 18 July 2013

Last Update 18 July 2013 2:26 am

Need some motivation to cut that flab? If you live in Dubai, you can win gold to do just that. A new campaign “You are Worth … Your Weight in Gold” is aimed at promoting a healthy lifestyle and achieving optimal body weight. The contest is open for public. 

The winner will be the one who loses maximum weight during the program period of 30 days from its inception on Friday this week. The top three winners will get a gold coin equivalent to AED 20,000. Other participants will get a gram of gold for each kilo reduced from their body weight. However, the minimum weight to lose for the eligibility is two kilograms.

Addressing a press conference on Tuesday, Dubai Municipality officials said the winners will get two grams of gold if they could reduce at least two kilograms within one month. 

Hussain Nasser Lootah, director-general of Dubai Municipality, said the initiative comes after the grand success of ‘Yallah Walk’ campaign launched in 2011.

“It is also aimed at introducing walking tracks in different parks in the city of Dubai. Walking is an easy and economic way to stay fit and healthy. The municipality has provided residents with safe and accessible walking tracks in urban and rural areas,’ Lootah said.

“Currently Dubai has a total of 91 places where one can practice sport activities. These include residential parks, public parks, jogging track and beaches. In addition to this, every year the civic body opens new parks in more areas and adds sports equipments and tools for the public to promote a healthy community, he said. 

“Ramadan is the most appropriate season to launch such initiatives as it reminds us about many health benefits of reducing weight and encourages us to take strong steps to change our bad lifestyles,’ he added. 

The weight of each participant will be measured during registration and at the end of program. Participants can register at the event sites any day during the period. Participants must have excess weight to reduce and stay away from unhealthy methods to lose weight.

The final weight will be measured after the Eid holidays on Aug. 16.

Ahmed bin Sulayem, executive chairman of Dubai Multi Commodities Center (DMCC), said the DMCC is proud to support this health awareness drive to encourage society to change their daily routines in return for a healthier lifestyle.

‘We would highly encourage everyone from all walks of life to take part in this great initiative and hope DMCC’s contribution of AED 100,000 worth of gold coins will help motivate individuals reach the final target of improving and sustaining a healthy lifestyle and consequently a better quality of life,’ he said.

“I am sure Dubai can be the role model and astonish the world by its innovative ideas and initiatives,” said Anil Dhanak, general manager of Dubai Gold & Jewelry Group.”

July 19, 2013 Posted by | Bureaucracy, Community, Cross Cultural, Cultural, Diet / Weight Loss, Eid, ExPat Life, Food, Fund Raising, Health Issues, Living Conditions, Ramadan | , , | 1 Comment

Specialization and Work

In today’s A Word a Day, Anu Garg quotes that great science fiction writer, Robert Heinlein. If you don’t know him, get a copy of his Stranger in a Strange Land, and move on from there. He makes you laugh, and cry, and THINK. I am in the middle of reading World War Z, very different from the movie, very thought provoking, and this quote fits beautifully the mid-crisis work of survival after society has collapsed. People need to be able to do things with their hands, things that help with the very real business of survival:

Science-fiction author Robert Heinlein once said, “A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.”

(How can you not love a man who believes that everyone should be able to change a diaper?)

I’ve always wanted to spin wool. I think I need to learn. I’ve often thought about how we would manage the basic necessities in a post-unthinkable-collapse society, you know, the basics like food, shelter, clothing, medications . . . Maybe, living in the South, I should learn how to work with cotton . . . or linen. Now I have to find out if flax will grow in Florida . . .

July 15, 2013 Posted by | Arts & Handicrafts, Civility, Community, Experiment, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Health Issues, Living Conditions, Political Issues, Survival, Technical Issue, Work Related Issues | 5 Comments

Rape Victim Spends Seven Months in Jail, Framed by her Rapist

Jerry Ramrattan raped his ex-girlfriend Seemona Sumasar, and she filed rape charges against him. He tried to encourage her, and to intimidate her into dropping the charges, but she wouldn’t. He then concocted a scheme where three different victims claimed she had robbed them, and she went to jail, losing her time, her house, her company and her daughter for seven months while she tried to prove herself innocent. In the end, one of the supposed robbery victims came forward and told the truth, leading the police to requestion the other two victims. In a very short time, they had the true picture, but meanwhile, Seemona Sumasar spent seven months in jail, innocent of any crime, victim only to Ramattan’s anger at being accused of rape. Now, he has been sentenced to 32 years in prison. Wooo HOOOO.

This is from the New York Times City Blog:

Man Is Sentenced for Raping Ex-Girlfriend and Then Framing Her

By DAN BILEFSKY
DESCRIPTION

Updated 5:42 p.m. | The Queens private detective who raped his ex-girlfriend and then framed her for a series of fictional crimeswas sentenced to the maximum of 32 years in prison on Wednesday, bringing to a close one of the most bizarre cases to grace a courtroom.

Using knowledge he acquired partly from watching crime dramas like “C.S.I.,” the private detective, Jerry Ramrattan, 39, orchestrated what prosecutors in Queens called one of the most elaborate frame-ups in recent history.

Mr. Ramrattan’s ex-girlfriend, Seemona Sumasar, 36, had accused him of raping her. After she refused to drop the rape charges, he concocted a schemethat landed her in jail for seven months, making it seem as though Ms. Sumasar was the likely perpetrator of a series of brazen armed robberies, for which she was accused of impersonating a police officer.

At his trial in State Supreme Court in Queens, prosecutors produced evidence that Mr. Ramrattan cajoled and extorted witnesses to falsely testify that she had robbed them. He even staged fake crime scenes, prosecutors said, in which he planted evidence, handcuffing one of Ms. Sumasar’s supposed victims to a pole and planting several bullets at the scene of one of the imaginary crimes.

Before Mr. Ramrattan was sentenced on Wednesday, Ms. Sumasar delivered a stinging victim impact statement, noting that he showed no remorse and was so intent on revenge that he would have stopped at nothing to destroy her. “I don’t have words for you,” she said as as he stared ahead, stone-faced, while she spoke. “You are pure evil. You are a sociopath. You need help.”

“Someone needs to put a stop to your madness,” she added.

During her seven months in jail, awaiting a robbery trial, Ms. Sumasar, a former Morgan Stanley analyst, was separated from her young daughter. She lost her business, and her house went into foreclosure. Her bail was set at $1 million, which she could not afford. Mr. Ramrattan, meanwhile, was free until an informant came forward in late 2010 and exposed his plot.

Mr. Ramrattan was convicted in November of a series of charges, including rape, conspiracy and perjury. The nearly monthlong trial offered two opposing plot lines that were seemingly irreconcilable. Prosecutors portrayed Ms. Sumasar as a single mother duped by a wily confidence man intent on malicious vengeance. But the defense characterized her as a dejected lover who had turned on Mr. Ramrattan after he said he was leaving her to return to his wife and family.

Members of the jury said the guilty verdict was predicated on their acceptance of Ms. Sumasar’s account of being bound with duct tape and viciously raped by Mr. Ramrattan, which apparently gave him a motive to create his ruse.

In his plea for leniency, Mr. Ramrattan insisted that he was innocent, saying that he had spent years helping the police solve cases as an informant. “I stand before you with no choice but to accept what is going to happen,” he said. “Think about all the cases I made over the years, the rape victims I assisted. I maintain my innocence.”

Before he was escorted away by police, he added: “There is more to come.” As he spoke, his mother, Shirley Ramrattan, began wailing and was escorted from the courtroom.

His lawyer, Frank Kelly, told the judge that Mr. Ramrattan was not the “monster” he had been made out to be.

But Justice Richard Buchter said Mr. Ramrattan deserved no mercy, calling him a “diabolical conniver and sinister manipulator” who had “shamelessly exploited the criminal justice system.”

The Queens district attorney’s office and the Nassau County district attorney’s office had insisted on Ms. Sumasar’s guilt up until she was freed just weeks before her own robbery trial was set to begin. Ms. Sumasar filed a civil suit in December against the New York City Police Department and the Nassau County Police Department for negligence leading to her wrongful imprisonment..

Justice Buchter railed against the Nassau County police, who had wrongly imprisoned Ms. Sumasar, saying that it did not take “a Sherlock Holmes” to deduce that a 5-foot-2 former Wall Street analyst with no criminal record would not have held people up at gunpoint.

He chastised the police for their egregious handling of the case, saying detectives had “turned a blind eye” to Ms. Sumasar’s protestations that she was innocent and had too easily been taken in by Mr. Ramrattan.

“The police were duped by liars by whom they had a right to be suspicious, and as a result a rape victim was framed by her rapist,” the judge said. “She was victimized by the rapist and then again by the criminal justice system.”

He added: “The defendant is the architect of his own ruin. He deserves no mercy from me, and he won’t get any.”

July 14, 2013 Posted by | Community, Crime, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Law and Order, Lies, Mating Behavior, Relationships, Scams, Women's Issues, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment

Justin Cronin: The Twelve

Screen shot 2013-07-13 at 9.07.49 AM

 

I had downloaded The Twelve to my iPad for a trip, but didn’t get to it, and sort of forgot it was there until my son mentioned he was listening to it on audio-books, and it was good, maybe even better than the first book in the trilogy, The Passage. He had loaned me The Passage several years ago when it came out, and as soon as I finished, I got on the list to download as soon as the next book came out – it was that good.

 

Cronin’s gift is an ability to create a future world entirely different from our own, with a devastating enemy – the virals – who, literally, are us, transformed. Cronin can make the enemy terrifying, destructive, truly horrifying – and can make them also captive to their repugnant nature and even pitiable. I think that is an amazing dance for an author to accomplish.

 

The setting is post-apocalyptic USA; the government had a sector working on a secret weapon which – of course – was not able to be contained, creating 12 super vampire-like creatures called Virals, who in turn create hordes of minions. This volume, The Twelve, is set more than 100 years later, but shifts back to earlier times to help us understand how this disaster occurred, and how characters relate back to the earliest times of the disaster.  The populations live in fear of sudden attacks; one family, out on a picnic, are almost totally wiped out by an eclipse for which the Virals were prepared – and the families were not.

 

As I read his books, I find them very cinematic, but, as my son and I discussed, too complex for a movie; it would need a gritty HBO series like The Wire, or OZ, or Deadwood to capture the subtleties, the nuances that make this a best-selling series. The heroes and heroines are all make for the screen, their relationships – and inter-relationships – make them interesting, and then, as we learn more, interesting again. We never know enough to make a final judgement on any character; the characters are complex and the relationships obscure until the author chooses to reveal. It makes it fun to try to spot them before he tells us. I missed a couple!

 

Although it can be read as a great-adventure stand-alone, you’ll be happier if you read The Passage before you read The Twelve. If you have a problem with postponing gratification, you might want to wait until the third and conclusive volume of the trilogy is published  – and that may be a year or so.

July 13, 2013 Posted by | Adventure, Books, Character, Community, Fiction, Health Issues, Living Conditions, Political Issues, Relationships, Social Issues, Survival | , | Leave a comment

Welcome Ramadan 2013!

 

 

 

happy-ramadan

 

My first Ramadan was in Tunisia. It was summer, it was hot, and the days were long. The days dragged by, and then, in the evenings, our neighbors would send over huge platters of lamb and couscous, hot and spicy, to share with us. Our neighbors had ten children, all around our age, some older, some younger, and cars would arrive endlessly, bringing and taking people. They often included us in the family gatherings, out of the kindness and generosity of their hearts.

Butterflied-lamb-with-pumpkin-and-couscous-salad

I didn’t understand how it all worked, Ramadan and fasting, and they would explain it to me. It’s a lot to take in. It took me a long time, many years, many Muslem countries, many Muslim friends. I still don’t think I understand all of it, but I understand enough of it to know this – it’s like a month of Christmas Eves.

 

A good Muslim won’t just fast from sunrise to sundown. A good Muslim circumcises his or her heart in this time. A good Muslim will read through the entire Quran at least once during Ramadan. The whole point of the sacrifice is to purify the soul.

 

I wish for my Muslim friends a joyful Ramadan, full of blessings. May God our Creator and Heavenly Father receive your sacrifice and bless your fasting. May your Mama prepare all your favorite foods for the breaking of the fast. 🙂

July 8, 2013 Posted by | Community, Cross Cultural, Cultural, ExPat Life, Faith, Ramadan, Tunisia | Leave a comment

Jeannette Walls and The Silver Star and Negligent Mothers

Screen shot 2013-07-02 at 8.26.53 AM

 

The first time I read anything by Jeannette Walls, I had not read her autobiographical best-seller, The Glass Castle. If I had, when I read the opening pages of one of my all-time-favorite books, Half Broke Horses , three young children out checking on the cows in America of the mid-1800’s, I would have said “Oh, yes, this is Jeannette Walls” instead of being so shocked that these three children were so far from home with a storm approaching. Not only does the storm approach – the oldest sister pushes her younger sister and brother up a tree and they are stuck there through a violent storm all night. No adult comes looking for them.

“Where is their mother?” in shock I thought, “a mother with three children out in the storm goes looking for them!”

Not if you are a Jeannette Walls mother. To ‘get’ Jeannette Walls, you really have to start with The Glass Castle, and learn about how she and her siblings are at the mercy of an alcoholic mother and father, both big liars, maybe with some attendant mental problems. Half Broke Horses is fiction, based on her own grandmother, who, at 15 rides 28 days across Indian territory to teach at a far-away school (What mother lets her 15 year old DAUGHTER ride for a month across dangerous country ALONE??)

I was on the send-as-soon-as-it’s-published list for Silver Star. And even once it arrived, I waited until I knew I might have a few free hours in the evening to read it – once you start Jeannette Walls, you can’t put it down. Her heroines in this novel are 15 year old Liz and 12 year old Bean (Jean) whose mother ran away from her hometown in Virginia to pursue a career in music. The mother has a small inheritance to sustain them; when life sours, as it often does for her, she packs the girls into her worn Dodge Dart and takes off. She isn’t always good about paying her bills. She talks to her girls about what a great team they are, and then takes off for a day or two, usually with some man, leaving them to eat chicken pot pies. Then, she abandons them with no sign of when she will be back.

The girls are pistols. They are survivors, much like Jeannette Walls grandmother in Half Broke Horses. When social services start coming around asking where their mother is, they take off headed for their Mom’s old home town, across the continent, in Virginia.

The heart of the story finds the girls living in the old family mansion, scouting for odd jobs, learning more about themselves and their heritage, and learning how a small community can smother, judge and support their community members in unexpected ways.

If you are a negligent, man-oriented, self-absorbed mother, you don’t want to have a writer for a daughter. Jeannette Walls is having a ball; her books are both sad and hilarious, and she has utter scorn for mothers who do not take the reins of motherhood and behave like grown-ups.

July 2, 2013 Posted by | Books, Character, Community, Cultural, Family Issues, Fiction, Financial Issues, Humor, Living Conditions, Parenting, Relationships, Women's Issues | Leave a comment