New Cat in Town
“It’s like bringing a new cat into the house,” I tell people when they ask about how I move so often, and how I have learned to survive, “You keep a new cat in a separate room while the other cat(s) get used to their smell, then you allow a little interaction, then a little more and it all works out. One cat may never warm up to a new cat, another cat will welcome it immediately.”
I’ve been that new cat. You walk carefully. You try to figure out how things work. You sort of walk around the edges of things. Occasionally, there will be a cat that doesn’t like me. I try to stay out of her way.
So on my way to church on Sunday, I was thinking about this move, and about how people and communities have rules they don’t even know they have. Like in Kuwait, I learned, when you make a condolence call, you are supposed to dress very simply and wear no make up. You keep your voice low, you stay only a certain amount of time. These rules aren’t written anywhere because, well, everyone who matters pretty much knows what they are . . .
You don’t think about going through cross-cultural experiences in your own country, but every community has its own uniqueness, its own differences.
I think about my home town of Edmonds, WA, where you never NEVER cross the street if the light is red, even if there are no cars visible for miles. It just isn’t done.
Even going to church can be a mine field. You would think that it would be a safe place, all these people of God, people of good will, gathered together. You would think that until you happened to sit by mistake in someone else’s place, a place they have sat every Sunday for forty years. Some people might handle it with grace, another might handle it with spite and malice.
There might be local customs I don’t know, like you don’t wear earrings during Lent (I made that up; it isn’t a rule, it is just an example of the kinds of things that can become custom) or you don’t park in this spot because Old Miss Rickety needs to park there. Every church passes the peace differently; even the liturgy, done in every church, has its quirks from congregation to congregation. Like the new cat, I kind of creep in to church quietly, look for an inconspicuous place, do my worship thing and leave quietly.
They need to get used to my smell, LLLOOLLLL. 🙂
From Kuwait MOI
One reader was asking about where to go online to pay his Kuwait traffic violations. While looking it up (Google “Kuwait Government Traffic Violations Website”) I found this essay on Equality Before the Law in Kuwait:
Lt. Gen. Al-Rejaib: His Highness the Amir stresses on applying the law on everyone
The Interior Undersecretary Lt. Gen. Ahmad Abdullatif Al-Rejaib affirmed on embedding the principle of reward and punish with applying it, where is no place in the Interior Ministry for slackers or neglegants or lacker individuals.
He stressed importance on respecting the authority of the security man after it had been affected for some reasons, affirming on the need of restoring mutual respect between the security man and citizens as well as residents.
Lt. Gen. Al-Rejaib cleared out thoughout his meeting which was featured with honesty and transparency on Wednesday morning 3/2/2010 attended by the Interior Assistant Undersecretary for General Security Affairs, Maj. Gen. KHalil Al-Shamali, leaders and officers of the General Security sector, that the supreme directives of His Highness the Amir, the Supreme Commander of the Armed Forces Sheikh Sabah Al-Ahmad Al-Jaber Al-Sabah, is to apply law on everyone and no one is above it no matter how high this person is.
Lt. Gen. Al-Rejaib urged the leaders and officers of the General Security sector to follow up on all the works that are assigned to them as well as the tasks entrusted on them with honesty and transparency so justice prevails among everyone and for homeland residents to live in comfort, secure and safety. He demanded to honor the hardworker as soon as he accomplished any such achievements so it would be a motivation and an incentive for others to do work accurately.
At the beginning of the meeting in where it was took place at First Lt. Gen. Yousef Al-Khurafi Hall, Lt. Gen. Al-Rejaib welcomed his brothers and sons leaders and officers of the General Security sector, and conveyed to them the greetings of H.E. the Interior Minister Staff Lt. Gen. (ret.) Sheikh Jaber Al-Khaled Al-Sabah and his good wishes for them for success and to exert to give more efforts.
This meeting comes for the sake of discussing many of the issues concerning about security direcotorates and police stations, emphysizing the importance of police station as it is the first point for citizen and resident to turn to and the first security venue known by the Kuwaiti society, he added.
He affirmed that police station was a safeguard for every citizen and resident and a source of fear for any such violators or outlaws; pointed out that the Ministry of Interior has restored the authority of police stations two years ago.
There are bright sides represented by outstanding distinguished efforts done by area leaders, police stations chiefs as well as their officers but in the other hand, there are few who don’t perform their duty in full, and this is not allowed for any case, he added.
Lt. Gen. Al-Rejaib warned on the sluggard individuals who will receive a proper punishment, whereas the sincere and hard work individuals will receive the most appreciable rewards. He stressed importance to reject any such favoritism or mediation or a compliment, and such matters should be dealt with strictness and be terminated.
The Lt. Gen. called on good work organization in police stations, mentioning that the Ministry of Interior is putting all possible support and resources from officers, constables and police patrols, and to such reasons police stations officers should be present in their posting duties.
The leaders of the General Security sector, on top of them Maj. Gen. Khalil Al-Shamali have to be in presence in their places day and night; therefore, it is not exceptable at all that high leaders are in presence at their posts and no police stations officers existed at their assigned locations, he pointed out.
He stressed out that evaluating leaders and officers work stemmed from their performing their duties on combating crime and running after outlaws and out system, and there are not such other way around.
Lt. Gen. Al-Rejaib requested leaders and officers of the General Security sector to work as always do and promised for the sake of Kuwait and its people who deserved to be given all such exerted efforts.
He called on police stations chiefs and their officers to identify the area nature where they work at in terms of its demographic structure, its foremost economical activities and its existent educational and banking facilities, affirming that such information are essential to be awared about by the police station officers.
The security work is an honorable task and an obligatory on us to hold responsibilities, working as a one team and any such achievements accomplished are due to fruitful cooperation and continuous coordination, and self-denial is a trait we should characterized by for the sake of homeland security, he noted out.
The Interior Undersecretary Lt. Gen. Ahmad Abdullatif Al-Rejaib concluded by expressing his hope that the leaders and officers of the General Security sector to be as always as they promised us of being discipline, committed with high duty performance; pointed out that this meeting is a beginning of a series of upcoming meetings with different security sectors.
In Pensacola, people ask me if I wasn’t scared living in Kuwait and Qatar. Safe? I feel safer in Qatar and Kuwait than in Pensacola! And that is what I tell them!
Who Will be my Friends?
This will be my 31st move.
When I moved back to Doha, as I sighed and packed boxes, I took a few minutes to sit down and count them up. 31 moves. A lifetime of changing houses . . .
Until I get to the new location, I am caught up in the crushing details of moving – decisions on what to take, what to leave and to whom, closing accounts, opening accounts, blah blah blah. It can be overwhelming. I always think about that old joke about “how do you eat an elephant?” and the answer is “one bite at a time.” It’s the same with moving. Don’t look at the big picture, just keep moving, one detail at a time, and it all works out.
But when I get there, I wonder who will be my friends? It can be a lonely 6 months to a year while waiting for the right friends to come along. I make friends easily, but the ones who are going to stick, those tried and true friends – it takes a while to figure out who those are going to be.
We are lucky this time, we have family waiting for us. Our son is already educating us on how to pronounce local streets and areas (No, Mom, not “Sehr-vahn’-teys” as the Spanish would say it, but “Sir-van’tees”, not “Tex’-are” but “Te-har”, LOL) and what attitudes and perceptions we might best keep to ourselves if we want to get along.
We want to get along. Ironically, moving back to our own country is more daunting than moving to another expat community. The expat communities are relatively open and fluid, people coming and going all the time, willing to accept new members and welcome them in. This move is going to be to a very different life and a very different community from that in which we have lived the last thirty something years . . . God always sends me good friends. I just wonder who those friends will be?
Anxiety and Me
Anxiety and me – we go a long way back.
I am greatly familiar with anxiety . . . it is almost genetic. Maybe I was born of a family of worriers, people who looked for all the worst possibilities, and then ruined a perfectly good day by focusing on things that might – or might not – ever happen.
Today’s reading from Forward Day by Day was just what I needed now, with a tiny newborn grandson who is coughing, and a house inspection which shows some things that need to be done, and a moving process about to take place, and an earth-shaking retirement . . . if you are the praying kind, I would ask for your prayers for peace of mind, strength in service and courage in the face of adversities and challenges.
FRIDAY, February 19
Philippians 4:1-9. Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanks-giving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing…if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Anxiety is a kind of fear–not of God, but of the unknown future. It is unreality. We draw the unreal future into the present and proceed to stab ourselves with it.
How passionately Jesus strove to overcome our delusion of crossing bridges before we come to them! Imagine an able and loving father whose children ran about in panic lest next year they might not have food to eat or clothes to wear.
Anxiety is a symptom. The disease is mis¬trust of our heavenly Father. The cure is to look around and see what he has done for us already and to thank him for it. How many lovely things, how much to praise him for! If anything is needed, ask: and then leave it to God. If he doesn’t give it, so much the better. It wasn’t needed. What God always will give–if we trust him–is his peace, the best gift. (1946)
PRAY for the Diocese of Bath and Wells (Canterbury, England)
Ps 95 & 31 * 35; Ezekiel 18:1-4, 25-32; John 17:9-19
One Brown Glove
Have I told you how cold it is in Pensacola?
People here are in fur coats, and gloves!
Today we drove up the Bayou and saw what we thought might be a run-over animal on the road, but it turned out to be one brown glove.
We were laughing at how easy it is to lose gloves – to end up with one of several different pairs. My Mom used to make us wear mittens that had a string attatching them; you ran it through the coat and out both arms so you wouldn’t be losing so many mittens. In Alaska, you really need those mittens.
I still have a pair of Nordic mittens my Mom knit me. No. No. They are not attached by strings; they are grown up mittens, LLLOOOOLLLL!
Famous Dave’s BBQ
Oh WOW.
AdventureMan wanted just one more BBQ meal to tide him over until he returns to Pensacola. We headed for Famous Dave’s, because they are really, really good.
AdventureMan had the pulled pork sandwich with baked beans and cole slaw:
I had the catfish platter, with baked beans and a cob of corn:
The catfish came with two sauces, a remoulade and a Thai sweet/hot sauce, but I prefer the BBQ sauces:
Oh my friends – Kuwait and Qatar need Famous Dave’s!
Pensacola Moments
Yesterday I drove AdventureMan to the airport. He rushed off to check in, planning to meet once the car was checked in. The checker-inner said “do you really want to pay $7.49 a gallon?” so I rushed off to fill the tank, God bless her. It’s funny, with all the stuff we have going on, little things we normally remember just slip right out of our minds.
I came back, picked up my next rental (I know, I know, not cost effective, but I thought I was going to buy a Rav4 while I was here – LLLOOOLLL! I still plan to, but I am waiting for some dealer incentives) and went in to spend some time with AM before he left.
When I came back out and went to my car, it REEKED! I have a non-smoker profile! I went back to the fast-booth, and waited in line. When I explained the problem, they gave me another car, a serious upgrade. Wooo HOOOO!
I only mention these instances, because two people at Avis/Budget Car Rental in Pensacola took the time to insure that I was a happy customer. I am. I am a happy customer.
Somewhere, I lost my sunglasses, and because mostly I only need glasses for driving, I needed to get a new pair. Walk in, have an eye exam within 30 minutes (he told me my old prescription was too strong!) and a pair of prescription sunglasses that are PERFECT in one hour. Professional, courteous service all the way.
I need some baby clothes, so I go to a very good department store looking for WARM baby clothes (it is very cold in Pensacola this year!) and the very nice lady says “Oh, we have some beautiful baby clothes I just marked down to 70% off.”
Am I dreaming?
Fun Packed Thursday
Who knew?
Who knew when we got up this morning what kind of day we would have? Our sweet daughter in law has been up most of the night with our sweet grandson, who is a little confused about day and night and other things. He was also a little bit jaundiced, so we wanted to take him in to the pediatrician, and at the same time, AdventureMan and I needed to get a H1N1 shot (Swine flu vaccine) which is recommended for all people in contact with precious new little babies.
We were confronted with the worlds “easiest” car seat, and trying to get the base installed. After a couple phone calls (and a rescheduling of our appointment) we got the car seat firmly established, and discovered little Grandson LOVES sleeping in his car seat. Who knew?
Our good friend and realtor lady comes by after lunch to help us write up two contracts – one buying, one selling – and it took hours, with three people in three different phone conversations at one time getting it all glued together.
During all this, our son gets a text message: the government offices in Pensacola will all be closed tomorrow for a SNOW day. A snow day in Pensacola! Pensacola, FLORIDA. LLOOLLLL!
Now, it is late afternoon, AdventureMan is back with little grandson, son and daughter in law are trying to get a little sleep – ah! remember those days of early parenthood? The effects of sleep deprivation?
We feel so blessed to be here at this time, to be able to help our son and his wife.
I was telling my daughter in law about how it works in Qatar, and how it works in some cases still, in Kuwait. When a woman has a baby, her husband takes her to the hospital, but he is not allowed in labor and delivery. If a woman has someone with her, it might be her Mom, or her sisters, or an aunt. She is expected to be very vocal, and the L&D ward is noisy with women vocalizing their “discomfort.”
The baby is born, and all the women’s family and friends visit. A family often brings big tankards of tea and coffee to the hospital, and little cups, to serve to all the visitors. A new mother can entertain, literally, dozens or even hundreds of visitors, because a hospital visit is expected.
When it comes time to go home, the woman and baby go to her parent’s home, where they take care of her and the baby for forty days. The husband visits, and he and his wife can play with the baby but the woman stays in bed most of the time while her family takes care of her and the baby. At the end of the forty days, the wife and baby go back home with her husband.
We agreed, that is a great way of doing things. A new Mother needs a lot of help. A new baby is kind of a shock; you can’t really tell anyone ahead of time what it is like to bring your first baby home.
It’s been a long day – and it isn’t even over.
The Five Legged Dog
“It’s like trying to buy a five-legged-dog,” my friend started out. When a friend starts a conversation with an opener like that, she has my full attention. “You look and you look, but you know at some point your going to have to give up one of the legs to find a dog to buy.”
We had been talking about house hunting. You know what you want. This house has most of it, but that house has all of it, at a price you can’t afford. Another house has everything, at a price you can afford, but you can see endless maintenance costs associated with ownership of that property. In short . . . there is no five legged dog. Somewhere along the way, you give up wanting it all and settle for good enough.
I think about that friend and her saying often. It’s become a family catch-phrase, they have heard me tell it so often. We’re all in search of that five legged dog.
(photo from public domain pictures)
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