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Where is Terekeka, South Sudan?

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Today the church prays for the diocese of Terekeka, in the South Sudan. I have never heard of Terekeka – have you?

When I looked for it on Google Maps, it didn’t have any information. When I went to The South Sudan and then googled Terekeka, it came up with a reference, and I had to go to this website to find it – they had a map.

The organization who put up the map, Harvesters Reaching Nations, has two locations in the southernmost part of South Sudan, the newest nation on earth. They are building hospitals, and taking in orphans. If I hadn’t gone looking, I would never have heard of the good works they are doing, saving lives, changing lives.

This is what they say:

We currently serve more than 190 orphans in two locations in South Sudan – Yei and Terekeka. Our school in Yei provides a Christian education to more than 500 students. In addition to our school-age orphans, more than 400 children from surrounding villages attend our school.

The Harvesters campus in Yei consists of 90 acres of land donated by the South Sudan government. Since our beginning in 2001, we have built homes, dorms, classrooms and other facilities within a fenced-in campus. We use the land we own beyond the fencing for planting and growing corn, tomatoes and other vegetables for use in the orphanage.

Harvesters’ campus in Terekeka, South Sudan opened in 2010. At this campus, we currently provide care for 44 orphans, but will grow to 80 in the near future. We have built homes, dorms and a clinic within a five acre, fenced-in campus. Additional facilities, including a church and school classrooms, will be built in the near future as the needs and resources dictate.

To do this, they sold everything they owned, and moved to the South Sudan, and used the proceeds from selling everything to build the hospitals and schools. I bet they are the happiest they have ever been, and the most thoroughly engaged in life they have ever been.

October 17, 2013 Posted by | Adventure, Africa, Charity, Circle of Life and Death, Community, Cross Cultural, ExPat Life, Faith, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Lectionary Readings, Living Conditions, Values | , , , | Leave a comment

Saudi Arabia Inching Toward Allowing Women to Drive

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Saudi Arabia is the only country in the world where women are not allowed to drive. There is an irony – there is no law banning women from driving. They do not issue driver’s licenses to women, they arrest women seen driving, and they do not – officially – teach women to drive. Thank God for good fathers and brothers and husbands, who take their daughters, sisters and wives to isolated places and teach them, often for the good of the family in case of an emergency.

Saudi women drive in Europe, in the USA – they drive everywhere except in their own country. The government shows signs of wanting to allow women to drive (officially) but they seem hesitate to stir the wrath of the religious police who believe – based on nothing – that God forbids women to drive. Recently, the head of the Saudi religious police said there is nothing in Islam that forbids a woman to drive. What’s the hold-up guys?

This article is from AOL Auto News, where you can also see a video of a woman driving in Saudi Arabia with cars passing her and waving encouragement:

Saudi Arabian Women To Protest Driving Ban On Oct. 26

Saudi society is slowly inching toward more equality, but driving is still disallowed for women

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When Farha was a young girl, about seven years old, her mother told her something that rocked her world: She said women could drive.

For Farha, a 24-year-old writer who has spent her entire life in Saudi Arabia, this was akin to a Western child learning the truth about Santa Claus. She’d only ever seen men behind the wheel in her country, where women are not permitted to drive. The revelation was slightly scandalous, a little bit funny, and totally paradigm-shifting.

It took another two years for Farha (who didn’t want to be identified with her last name due to the sensitivity of the issue in her home country) to decide she would, one day, learn how to drive a car. And, for good measure, she’d learn how to ride a bike. Two modes of transportation that have been banned to women and girls for most of Farha’s lifetime.

On Oct. 26, women in Saudi Arabia will engage in the third protest against the female driving ban by getting behind the wheel anyway. The protest won’t be widely attended, because the vast majority of women in Saudi Arabia don’t know how to drive. There are no driving schools in the Kingdom that cater to females, and state agencies will not issue a driver’s license to a woman.

“Since there is no justification for the Saudi government to prohibit adult women citizens who are capable of driving cars from doing so, we urge the state to provide appropriate means for women seeking insurance of permits and licenses to apply and obtain them,” a petition at the protestor’s web site reads. The web site has been blocked within Saudi Arabia, yet there are still a thousand or so names on the petition. The few women who are adept behind the wheel learned while living overseas, often in the U.S., Canada, or nearby Bahrain or Dubai.

In urban areas, women are chauffeured around by male relatives or paid drivers, or they pay for taxis. In rural areas, the driving ban generally isn’t enforced, and more women drive out of necessity. One woman who was recently videotaped disobeying the ban got support from her fellow (male) drivers, who passed by and gave her the thumbs up, a sign that society may be more willing to accept an eventual change.

Learning to drive

Farha tackled the task of learning to drive first by reading about the process. She edited a story on how to drive for her high school newspaper, and from that she felt she learned quite a bit. Then her father spent some time talking to her about how cars work, and the theoretical aspects of driving. He took her out for a few hours over the course of a few days, letting her drive around their neighborhood in the coastal city of Jeddah. But she never ventured onto the main roads.

She also learned the basics of riding a bicycle, but doesn’t consider herself adept at either skill. When the ban is lifted, she said she’ll sign up for classes at a real driving school.

“I always thought this ban would go away when I was 18,” she told AOL Autos. We connected with her through a publication where Farha wrote, under a pseudonym, about the driving ban. “And I’m still hoping it will be lifted when I am 26.”

“I always thought this ban would go away when I was 18,” Farha said. “And I’m still hoping it will be lifted when I am 26.”
Not driving makes life’s everyday movements difficult. Sidewalks aren’t available, so walking isn’t realistic. Farha’s father has mostly been responsible for driving her and her mother around, but five months ago he got into a car accident and broke his leg. He is currently unable to drive. Farha feels the burden of her father’s injury. If she could drive, she said, she could bring him to doctor’s appointments and help him get out of the house. Instead, the family is home-bound unless they pay someone to bring them places.

Farha has hired a part-time driver to take her to and from work. It costs about 2,000 to 3,000 Saudi riyals (or around $530 to $800) a month for a driver. That’s about the same amount that women make earning minimum wage in Saudi Arabia, prompting many women to just stay home.

“A lot of women don’t feel the incentive to work and hire a driver,” she said. “It doesn’t make any economic sense.”

Some women opt for the public bus system, but that makes women from conservative families feel nervous because it exposes them to strange men – the exact problem the country is trying to avoid by banning women drivers. Taxis run the same problem, putting females into cars with strange men. “It doesn’t make sense,” Farha said.

Farha is considering signing up for a karate class, but she’ll have to pay her driver for more hours or take a taxi to the classes. On top of the class fees, the price of getting to and from karate starts to seem like a silly amount of money, she said.

And she worries she’s spending too much money on herself. She could spend 30 riyals on a taxi each way, or she could donate that money to a family in need. Or spend that money sending school supplies to girls in other countries.

“It’s a difficult decision to make every time,” she said.

One unintended consequence of the rule strikes Farha as incredibly unsafe: Women often let their 13-year-old sons drive them around when they are out of other options. Farha’s observation was backed up by a U.S. intelligence research note made public by Wikileaks, which noted that these young drivers sometimes get into very serious accidents.

Weird, long history

Oddly enough, there isn’t any actual law in Saudi Arabia banning women from driving. In 1991, the late Grand Mufti of Saudi Arabia, Sheik Abdulaziz bin Baz issued a fatwa prohibiting women from driving. A fatwa is different from a government law, in that only followers of the religious leader who issues the fatwa are obliged to follow that law. But given the intertwined nature of Saudi Arabia’s government and its religious leaders, the fatwa took hold. The government agency in charge of issuing driver’s licenses will not issue one to a woman. Saudi Arabia’s court system relies heavily on fatwas from the Grand Mufti.

So, in essence, the religious order became a rule that everyone follows, even though it’s not enforced by the Saudi government. The government just makes it impossible for women to get drivers licenses, and if they catch women driving, they make them sign a pledge promising they won’t do it again.

Abdulaziz bin Baz said at the time that the ban would protect women, because allowing women to drive would put them out in society alone, leaving them to mix with men. If women were stranded by the side of the road due to a flat tire or car problem, they could end up being assaulted or raped by a man who came to help them, argue critics who still uphold the ban.

A reporter for the Christian Science Monitor recalled a 2012 conversation with a man in Saudi Arabia about what would happen if the ban was lifted. “What would happen if a woman got in a car accident, he asked? Then she would be forced to deal with the male driver of the other car, a stranger, with no oversight – a problematic situation in a country where male guardianship of women is deeply entrenched.”

Just last week, a Saudi cleric came under fire for claiming women were damaging their pelvises and causing birth defects by driving. Sheikh Saleh bin Saad al-Lohaidan argued women should put reason ahead of their hearts, because it “could have negative physiological impacts as functional and physiological medical studies show that it automatically affects the ovaries and pushes the pelvis upward.”

Saudi society is slowly inching toward more equality for women. Just this week, four women became attorneys. Earlier this year, women were allowed to work in retail establishments that sell underwear and bras, taking away the embarrassment for women who’d previously had to purchase these items from male salespeople.

Since around 2006, the Saudi government has been indicating it would consider lifting the driving ban if society deems it acceptable for women to drive. Diplomatic cables released by Wikileaks showed the U.S. government has been paying attention to this issue, and putting some pressure on the Saudis to change their ways.

Will of the people?

But it’s clear the Saudi government won’t make any controversial moves: “This has to do with the will of Saudi society,” said Saudi Justice Minister Muhammad Al-Issa in a TV interview in April, according to a translation by the non-profit group MEMRI. “If Saudi society, given its culture, wants women to drive, it’s fine. But if society has any reservation for whatever reason, that’s fine too.”

Farha said she’s holding out hope that the rules will change, as soon as possible. But the change will depend greatly on men’s attitudes.

“More men certainly support it now, but … they have their concerns,” she said. And “some are outright hostile to the idea.”

When she does get her license, Farha said she’d like to try driving a sports car. It doesn’t matter what kind, she just would like to try driving something fun. But she’d rather be able to walk or bike to work, even if she could drive.

“Cars feel suffocating inside,” she said. “But the whole idea is to lift this difficulty for women. I hope it happens soon.”

In sharing this story, and others, with our readers we hope you are inspired to Raise Your Hand for girls’ education, helping us spread the word on this crucial effort.

October 12, 2013 Posted by | Adventure, Cooking, Cross Cultural, Cultural, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Law and Order, Living Conditions, Social Issues, Values, Women's Issues | Leave a comment

Taliban Says Malala ‘Has Done Nothing To Earn Prize’

Mr. Taliban, did you see Jon Stewarts interview with Malala? (See below) All she wants is an education. She wants an education for herself, but also for all children in Pakistan. Your children, too! She wants them to have that opportunity, that’s all. And she has paid the price for her courage speaking out, and she bravely continues to state the obvious – there is nothing in Islam against educating women.

MIRANSHAH, Pakistan: The Pakistani Taliban Thursday said teenage activist Malala Yousafzai had done “nothing” to deserve a prestigious EU rights award and vowed to try again to kill her.

The European Parliament awarded the Sakharov human rights prize to the 16-year-old, who has become a global ambassador for the right of all children to go to school since surviving a Taliban murder attempt.

Malala survived being shot in the head by a TTP gumnan on October 9 last year and is seen as a leading contender for the Nobel Peace prize, to be announced on Friday.

“She has done nothing. The enemies of Islam are awarding her because she has left Islam and has became secular,” Tehreek-e-Taliban Pakistan (TTP) spokesman Shahidullah Shahid told AFP by telephone from an undisclosed location.

“She is getting awards because she is working against Islam. Her struggle against Islam is the main reason of getting these awards.”

He repeated the TTP’s threat – made numerous times in recent months -try again to kill Malala, “even in America or the UK”.

Malala and moved to Britain in the wake of the shooting for treatment and to continue her education in safety.

Feted by world leaders and celebrities for her courage, Malala has addressed the UN, this week published an autobiography, and could become the youngest ever Nobel Peace Prize laureate on Friday.

Her autobiography “I am Malala”, written with journalist Christina Lamb, has gone on sale in Pakistan and Shahid warned the Taliban would target bookshops stocking it.

“Malala is the enemy of Islam and Taliban and she wrote this book against Islam and Taliban,” he said. (AFP)

October 10, 2013 Posted by | Character, Civility, Communication, Community, Counter-terrorism, Cultural, Education, ExPat Life, Faith, Family Issues, Free Speech, Generational, Interconnected, Living Conditions, Pakistan, Poetry/Literature, Social Issues, Values | , , | Leave a comment

Palafox One of ‘Ten Best Streets in America’

From today’s Pensacola News Journal, the best parade street I have ever seen is recognized nationally for parades, restaurants and community spirit.

Palafox named one of Ten Best Streets in America

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Written by
Julio Diaz
and Kevin Robinson

Need more proof that Palafox Place has become a thriving thoroughfare? Here it is: Palafox Place is one of 10 “Great Streets in America for 2013,” according to the American Planning Association.

The independent, not-for-profit educational organization — affiliated with the American Institute of Certified Planners — named Palafox Place alongside streets in Philadelphia; Galveston, Texas; Honolulu; and Corning, N.Y., on its 2013 list.

“For hundreds of years, Palafox Street has been at the center of life in our city,” Mayor Ashton Hayward said in a news release. “Over the past three decades, our community has reinvested in Palafox Street and, as a result, Palafox has once again become the anchor to a thriving, vibrant downtown and a city in renaissance.”

The organization recognized the eight-block stretch from Wright Street to Main Street. Locals will note that Palafox Place addresses run from 1 to 400 south of Garden Street, so this honor additionally includes parts of North and South Palafox Street (from Wright Street to Garden Street and from Government Street to Main Street).

The selection cites the historic architecture and character of the street, as well as popular events such as Mardi Gras parades and the annual Pelican Drop on New Year’s Eve; management of public events and street closures by the Downtown Improvement Board; private investment, including the Al Fresco food trailer court; and a variety of planning and preservation achievements.

You can read the entire article by clicking here.

Or better yet – come for Mardi Gras! See for yourself 🙂

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October 5, 2013 Posted by | Civility, Community, Cultural, Customer Service, Entertainment, ExPat Life, Living Conditions, Mardi Gras, Pensacola, Statistics | , | 2 Comments

Steamer Trunks

I saw this ad in a higher end magazine and felt a bolt of recognition pass through me . . . my Mom had a suitcase, probably from her Mom or grandmother, that looked like this. She stored special fabrics in it for later use. It always smelled like faraway places.

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Look at the space! You can pack everything neatly into drawers, you can hang your hanging clothes.

These were for ship travel, where someone would deliver your trunk to the ship and sometimes, even unpack it for you and store the trunk in the hold while you dined and supped your way across the Atlantic – maybe ten to fourteen days. There were no restrictions on numbers of bags, no restrictions on bag size.

Even as a child, going back and forth to university from Germany, we had BIG bags, huge bags we could stuff full. The two bag limit was 77 pounds, but it seems to me that the airline staff always looked the other way. I still get steamed every time I fly a “foreign” (i.e. not an airline I have privileges on) airline and have to pay a baggage fee for even one bag. Stuffed in like sardines, even in business class. Unspeakable food, tinier and tinier restrooms . . . People fighting for space in the overhead bins . . .

Oh my gosh; I am talking like an OLD person.

October 4, 2013 Posted by | Adventure, Aging, ExPat Life, Living Conditions, Random Musings, Travel | , | 2 Comments

Here Comes Karen

As I’ve watched Pensacola weather over the three years we have lived here, I have seen a hilarious co-incidence. If there is ever going to be a cold spell, or a lengthy rainy spell, it is going to hit for the weekend. It’s a pity, the beaches in Pensacola are at their most glorious in October, no tourists, just locals enjoying the God-given beauty of sun, sand and surf. The restaurants are accessible, you can find parking . . . and then the rain hits.

Long term forecasts for the summer were that while the rest of the USA would have record highs, we would have cooler, overcast skies. I don’t remember them mentioning record rains, that would rot the crops in the fields.

Last night, at an event, a friend said she and her closest 300 friends were going camping, but she had heard there might be something blowing in this weekend. Sure enough, when I checked WeatherUnderground this morning, there are bit warnings for Tropical Storm Karen to hit – you guessed it – on Saturday. Oh aarrgh.

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Batten down the hatches, matey. Oh wait, Talk-like-a-pirate-day was last week.

October 3, 2013 Posted by | ExPat Life, Living Conditions, Pensacola, Random Musings, Safety, Weather | Leave a comment

‘Staggering’ Traffic in Qatar as Cars Exceed Highway Capacity

From the Gulf Times Qatar

By Bonnie James/Deputy News Editor

Increase in the number of vehicles beyond the carrying capacity of roads, improper driving manners of many motorists and road works are among the key factors behind the acute traffic congestion currently being experienced in Doha and suburbs, it has been pointed out.

Brigadier Mohamed Saad al-Kharji, director of the Traffic Department, was on record the other day that the number of vehicles in Qatar has exceeded 1mn.

The total number of registered vehicles in Qatar had stood at 876,039 in 2012, according to official statistics. This means, as many as 123,961 new vehicles have been added to the roads within nine months of this year, at the average rate of a 13,773 every month, whereas the 2012 average for new vehicles was only 5,138 per month.

“The increase in the number of new vehicles is staggering and at almost three times the monthly average from 2012, it now exceeds the carrying capacity of the roads of Doha and suburbs, even from a layman’s perspective,” a traffic safety expert said.

This is evident on Al Shamal Road, a vital link of the Qatar Expressway Programme and a major arterial thoroughfare, during peak hours from Sunday to Thursday. All the way from The Mall signal to the Gharrafa area, the highway is clogged with bumper-to-bumper traffic.

“The average speed on Al Shamal Road would be around 30kmh, as against the maximum allowed speed of 100kmh, and that too if there are no accidents,” observed a motorist who drives on the highway regularly.

The congestion on Al Shamal Road has gone from bad to worse ever since the reopening of schools on September 10, compared to the time before the summer vacation, asserted another resident.

“Al Shamal Road is the preferred choice of tens of thousands of motorists who have to travel to the northern parts of the country and back, but the carrying capacity of its busiest portions has been exceeded,” the expert maintained.

Though Al Shamal Road has three lanes each in either direction, they are proving thoroughly inadequate during the rush hours. “You have to go beyond the Gharrafa stretch to be able to drive at the maximum permissible speed, if proceeding to the north,” a motorist said.

Many road users also feel the traffic management strategy leaves much to be desired, especially with regard to Al Shamal Road.

“On Thursday, access from many service roads to Al Shamal Road was blocked off in a bid to ease congestion on the highway. But this led to vehicles being stuck on the service roads for up to 40 minutes,” a road user recalled.

A parent who drives his children from the Qatar Decoration area of Salwa Road to their school at Duhail, a distance of about 23km, said it took him more than one hour to reach the destination, as access to Al Shamal Road from the service road at Al Waab was blocked.

“My children were late for school the first time this academic year as we were stuck on a service road for nearly 40 minutes while vehicles were moving fast on Al Shamal Road, a rare sight these days,” he said.

Many motorists don’t use indicators or move ahead promptly when the vehicle in front moves. “It is a common sight to see people having their breakfast, putting on make up, or having animated conversations on a handheld phone, while they are behind the wheel, oblivious to the fact that they are holding up traffic and aggravating the congestion,” noted a woman who observes the road scenes from her front passenger seat.

The traffic situation on the Corniche is expected to take a turn for the worse, given that Grand Hamad Street’s intersection with Doha Corniche has been closed for 10 days from Thursday midnight.

“If I used to start from home at 6.30am before summer vacation, I leave 15 minutes early these days, but now I guess I have no option but to start even earlier,” another motorist added.

The helicopter patrol, introduced by the Traffic Department since last week, to help ease congestion on Qatar roads by giving guidance to police on the ground during morning rush hours has improved traffic flow by 30%, according to Brigadier al-Kharji.

October 2, 2013 Posted by | Cultural, Doha, ExPat Life, Living Conditions, Qatar, Road Trips, Safety | Leave a comment

Saudi Cleric: Driving Hurts Womens’ Ovaries

From today’s Kuwait Times:

RIYADH: A Saudi cleric sparked a wave of mockery online when he warned women that driving would affect their ovaries and bring “clinical disorders” upon their children. The warning came ahead of an October 26 initiative to defy a longstanding driving ban on women in the ultra-conservative kingdom.

“Physiological science” has found that driving “automatically affects the ovaries and pushes up the pelvis,” Sheikh Saleh Al-Luhaydan warned women in remarks to local news website Sabq.org. “This is why we find that children born to most women who continuously drive suffer from clinical disorders of varying degrees,” he said. His comments prompted criticism on Twitter, which has become a rare platform for Saudis to voice their opinions in the absolute monarchy. “What a mentality we have. People went to space and you still ban women from driving. Idiots,” said one comment.

Luhaydan, a member of the senior Ulema (Muslim scholars) Commission and former head of the Supreme Judicial Council, said that “evidence from the Holy Quran and Sunna (the teachings of the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) completely prohibit (women’s driving) on moral and social background.”

An online petition titled “Oct 26th, driving for women” amassed nearly 12,000 signatures, while access to it was blocked in the kingdom yesterday. Saudi Arabia is the only country where women are banned from driving. Activists declared a day of defiance against the ban on June 17, 2011, but few women answered the call to drive. Some of those who did were stopped by police and forced to sign a pledge not to take to the wheel again.

Saudi Arabia imposes other restrictions on women, including a requirement to cover themselves from head to toe when in public. The 2011 call, which spread through Facebook and Twitter, was the largest mass action since November 1990, when 47 Saudi women were arrested and severely punished after demonstrating in cars. – AFP

September 30, 2013 Posted by | Cross Cultural, Cultural, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Interconnected, Living Conditions, Saudi Arabia, Social Issues, Women's Issues, Work Related Issues | 10 Comments

God Vs. Worry; God Wins

One of the things that adds texture to my life, and helps keep me on the straight and narrow (and that takes a LOT) is reading the daily lectionary every single morning of the year, before I do anything else. Normal days, I access it from my computer, traveling or appointment days, I can access it from my iPad or iPhone. It’s like a little extra fence that helps keep me safe from myself and my own creativity when it comes to evil.

There is another side, the blessing side. In one of the bible studies I attend, we learn, over and over that God blesses the believer. You don’t have to be perfect – and it’s a good thing, because none of us are. If you want to see how much God can love a sinner, just read your bible. Sin is one of the main characters, right along side Abraham and Sarah, Job, Lot, and especially King David.

But in my life, I have seen wondrous things, and I have had some totally WOW moments when God has blessed me beyond any prayer I could have raised. One of those moments was showering under a waterfall near an oasis in the Tunisian desert. Two others happened this year, and these were blessings that stopped me in my tracks with their timing and aptness. First, we got an unexpected tax refund which arrived in our account just in time to cover the big expensive air conditioning system on the main floor when it broke and had to be replaced.

Second, when we were looking for the last few thousand dollars to help us buy a new car (we prefer to pay cash) we got another tax refund – we had asked that they re-look taxes for a move, and they allowed the moving expenses. We had waited almost a year for that decision; we had waited so long we had pretty much forgotten and given up on it. I mean tax refunds – it’s a never-never land, it all seems so arbitrary. You can have a perfect case, and it can be denied for a reason you’ve never heard of.

God’s timing is perfect. His sense of humor is breath-taking. The funds we needed poured into our hands just when we needed them, in just the right amount.

Matthew 6:25-34

25 ‘Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink,* or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life?* 28And why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin, 29yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these.

30But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31Therefore do not worry, saying, “What will we eat?” or “What will we drink?” or “What will we wear?” 32For it is the Gentiles who strive for all these things; and indeed your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33But strive first for the kingdom of God* and his* righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

34 ‘So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today’s trouble is enough for today.

September 30, 2013 Posted by | Cultural, ExPat Life, Faith, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Lectionary Readings, Moving, Spiritual, Tunisia | 2 Comments

“Is Your Cat Always Fractious?”

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“Fractious” isn’t a word you often hear. Clearly the veterinary tech had just read the word off the record, perhaps there is some warning in there about the Qatari Cat.

The Qatari Cat was born on the streets of Qatar, and had a bumpy start with another owner. While the man and his daughter liked him just fine, the wife and her mother did not. When the Qatari cat came to live with us, he was very wary of me. It took a couple years for him to fully trust me. He watched my feet all the time. He quailed in fear, ears back, if I used a loud voice. He was terrified of the sound of plastic bags.

Slowly, slowly, we built a relationship. Today, ten years later, he is a sweet cat.

He is a sweet cat every single day of the year, but he still has his street instincts. AdventureMan has learned that you can’t play rough with the Qatari Cat; you play rough, you lose. I never speak loudly to him; it just won’t work, it just gets his back up. Because he knows I am the boss, I speak sternly, but softly to him and he will do just what I ask him to do.

Our first visit to the vet went badly. You can read about it here. He was fine until the buzzing razor hit his bottom and then all his survival instincts kicked in. He’s been back twice, and he has been as good as gold, but somehow . . . that notation has stuck.

“No!” I replied, maybe a little bit too loudly.”No! He is a sweet kitty! He is snuggly and loving and quiet and good! But if he is scared, he wants to defend himself.” I told the tech about the Italian vet the Qatari Cat fell in love with in Kuwait, she snuggled him and told him how beautiful he was and how much she loved him and he was putty in her hands. I was almost jealous. I thought maybe she distilled some catnip and mixed it with her perfume or something, Qatari Cat’s eyes glazed a little in sheer adoration when he was around her, and he even drooled a little. She could take his temperature, give him a shot and check his innards and he never complained, just looked at her adoringly.

The tech shot a skeptical look at me and exited the room. I could hear her repeat this to the vet, and muffled laughter before she entered the room again.

So the vet came in and snuggled Qatari Cat, and told him he was pretty, and while she did not say it with an Italian accent, Qatari Cat was clearly intrigued – and on his best behavior. It doesn’t take much . . . he’s a male. Snuggle him a little, rub his fur the right way, chat him up . . . it doesn’t have to be rational, it’s all in the tone of voice and the flirtation. He totally digs it, he eats it up. A little grope here, a quick look at the teeth, a quick injection and he’s finished, not a fractious moment in the entire visit.

On the way home, we laughed thinking of our sensitivity at having our cat called “fractious.” We remember the indignant response of friends whose cat was annotated as “vicious” by a German vet. The cat was diabetic and objected to the roughness with which the vet wanted to take his blood. I think if you are a veterinarian, you might have an understanding that a sick animal, or a scared animal, might act unpredictably or defensively, there are big thick gloves you can wear if an animal seems wired up.

Does this look like a fractious cat to you?

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September 23, 2013 Posted by | Civility, Communication, Community, Customer Service, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Kuwait, Living Conditions, Pensacola, Pets, Qatteri Cat, Relationships | 4 Comments