EUPHROSYNE/SMARAGDUS OF ALEXANDRIA
MONASTIC, 5TH c.
From today’s lectionary, one of my favorite stories of early Saints
Prayer for today: (contemporary language)
Merciful God, who looks not with outward eyes but discerns the heart of each: we confess that those whom we love the most are often strangers to us. Give to all parents and children, we pray, the grace to see one another as they truly are and as you have called them to be. All this we ask in the name of Jesus Christ, our only mediator and advocate. Amen.
“Saint Euphrosyne of Alexandria (fl. 5th century CE) was a female saint who adopted male attire and lived at a local monastery as an ascetic.
Euphrosyne was the beloved only daughter of Paphnutius, a rich man of Alexandria, miraculously born in her parents’ old age in answer to a monk’s prayer. Her loving father desired to marry her to a wealthy youth.
But having already consecrated her life to God and under pressure to break her vow, she dressed as a man and assumed the identity of “Smaragdus” (“emerald”). She then escaped to a nearby men’s monastery, where she made rapid strides toward a perfected ascetic life. She was under the guidance of the abbot, who also happened to be the same monk who had prayed for her birth.
Years later, when Paphnutius appealed to the abbot for comfort in his bereavement, the abbot committed him to the care of Euphrosyne, still under the guise of Smaragdus. Paphnutius received from his own daughter, whom he had failed to recognize, helpful advice and comforting exhortation. Not until she was dying did Euphrosyne reveal herself to him as his lost daughter. After burying her, Paphnutius gave up all his worldly goods, and became a monk in the same monastery. There, he used his daughter’s old cell until his own death ten years after. “
from Wikipedia
A dying Euphrosyne reveals herself to her father
As I read today’s lectionary, I am struck by how very blind we are to the realities of God’s creation, that in every tribe and every nation, there are those who are outside the normal boundaries of gender, and who are, at the same time, the people God created them to be. How cruel we are! We judge, and we call names, we cast out – in every tribe and nation in the world – those who are Other, who do not fit into our tiny human conception of “right.” I can imagine the overwhelming revelation as we transcend into the after life.
Morocco Malta and the Med: Malaga, Spain
Dawn finds us in Malaga, our last new city on this cruise.
You can see the buses lined up already to take us on tours of the city.
In front of us looks like a huge beer tent!
We are told this cruise ship never moves. It is undergoing renovation and no one knows when it will finish.
Lots of Expats buying property in Malaga, forcing prices up, our guide tells us.
You can see the bull fighting arena from this overlook.
Malaga is proudly home to Picasso’s birthplace.
Once again we were trying to break down some of our larger Euro bills so we went into a supermarket where we found some small things. I went through the cashier and then waited outside for my husband. He got the old fish eye; maybe the cashier is wise to tourists needing smaller change.
Love to see recycling!
Tourists love Malaga. It is the end of November. The place is packed, expecially here at the castle.
The guide is finishing our walking tour, which has been crowded with many groups of people just like us.
As the guide finishes our walking tour, which has been crowded but informative and a lot of fun, he points out the way to the open market (!) and then shows us where we will be able to catch the shuttle back to the ship. Yes! He also points out one of the oldest ice cream shops in Malaga, famous for the quality and variety of its ice creams. Sign us up!
We thank the guide, tip him with great appreciation, and head off toward the old central market. If you haven’t guessed, this is one of our favorite places to eat (think really fresh), for taking photos, and for seeing people who really live in a place and what they are buying and eating. We find an outdoor restaurant where people are eating interesting-looking food. We get to know the couple at the table next to us; they are from Amsterdam and just down for a four-day weekend to soak up some beach time and some good Spanish food. What a luxury to just come to Malaga for a four-day weekend!
My husband’s beer glass was particularly beautiful. The beer was very good.
Above are Tomatoes and Tuna, very fresh, very good. Below are anchovies in a vinegar brine. A little was good, but this was too much anchovy, and raw, even for me. The green olives were delicious.
A brochette of grilled shrimp – fresh, delicious.
Spicy shrimp with garlic and peppers. You think you are OK and you are thinking how delicious this dish is, and then the heat hits you. Oh Wow! We had fresh bread to soak up the sauces.
We’ve saved room for dessert and AdventureMan kept track of where the famous ice cream shop was.
Look at that chocolate! It was decadent, so chock full of flavor. AdventureMan had the pistachio and says it was very fine pistachio ice cream.
No, not small servings, but it is our last day in Spain, and the ice cream is so good we choose not to feel guilty about it. As it turned out, it was so rich, I couldn’t eat all of mine anyway.
We walk down to where the guide showed us to catch a shuttle back to the ship, and – nothing. No people, no signage, nothing. Maybe we misunderstood? We walked about a mile along a tourist waterfront walkway and asked people; no one could tell us. At the other end, the Hop On Hop Off boat people said they thought it was back where we started.
Back where we started are some passengers we recognize, and they are all grumbling and complaining. No signage, no red-vested Viking people but this is where the shuttle is supposed to be and they were told the shuttle drivers were taking an hour or so for lunch. There is one young man that they think is with Viking but he is busy looking at his phone, does not seem to speak English (or doesn’t want to) and is not helpful. He does have a red Viking bag.
And then we see the shuttle. It is coming! We get on, and some of the crew get on and we are all riding back together but here come some more Viking passengers and there is no more room in the bus! The passengers are running across the busy street, waving their arms and yelling “Wait! Wait!” but the driver drives faster. We know they got back to the ship on the next bus, but they were angry!
Ah well. Small drama. We put on our swimsuits and head for the spa. As we soak in the waves and bubbles for the last time, we review the trip and think how lucky we are. We never had any serious rain, only maybe ten minutes in Malta. No big deal. And all the ports gave us what we needed – new sights, new experiences, new understanding of how the world works. We love our cabin, our stewards have treated us like royalty, and we’ve met some interesting people and some nice people. This has been a really good trip for us.
Tonight is a special night, a BBQ at the swimming pool with live music and dancing, loud speakers and games.
It is also Thanksgiving. We thought we would go to the BBQ but as we walk through it is crowded and we don’t see anywhere to sit, so we go into the World Cafe. The World Cafe is quieter and we have turkey and whatever else we want. We don’t mind missing the BBQ. We are not too hungry because of the meal at the market and the ice cream 😊.
Sailing away from Malaga.
We find life on a ship can be a little compressing; these stops in Cadiz and Malaga have given us what we need; time on our own to walk and explore and learn at our own pace, to stop and eat good ice cream when we want, to just sit and chat with strangers, to stop in a China shop for a hair clip – just time, time to ourselves. These are the things that make us happy when we travel.
Morocco Malta and the Med: Tunisian Interlude
We aren’t just sailing away from Malta. We are sailing toward a part of our history, and please pardon that these photos are not that great; I don’t even know what kind of camera we were using and they are now very old.
We lived in Tunis for two years, courtesy of the US Government, wanting us to be linguistically and culturally more fluent. For me, it was scary at first – coming from Monterey, CA and entering into what seemed to be a very alien culture.
It began a great leap in opening our visions to other ways of thinking.
Below is our old villa – I am showing you this because when we went to visit it, it looked entirely different.
Our son went to a local Pre-School, Joie de Vivre, the Joy of Life 😊. This is his class photo.
AdventureMan on our back porch, where we often ate. We only had air conditioning in our bedrooms. The candelabras (there were two) were made for us in Binzerte.
My French teacher, Madame Huguette Curie invited us into her culture; she lived on Avenue Habib Bourgiba in a palatial apartment and had this seaside cottage where we could swim and picnic together. She was beautiful and cultured, and helped us learn about and love our time in Tunisia.
My parents came to visit, and we had a wonderful time showing them Tunisia. This was at the Ampitheatre in El Jem.
We camped in desolate areas – now built up – in our Volkswagon Bus.
Once a year, there was a Bedouin festival in Douz (where much of the original Star Wars was filmed.) We camped there, too, and have never been colder in our lives than in the Tunisian desert in late November.
The Camel Market in Nabuel was a great weekend favorite.
So my friends, on! on! We are on our way back to Tunis, 46 years later.
Saying Goodbye to Al Marai Coffee Cups
All my nomadic life, I have had to sift, sort and weigh the value of my belongings – literally. As an Army wife and later a corporate wife, I had a weight allowance as we moved from country to country. My life was full of leaving things behind – friends, churches, social groups, jobs, my identity – as well as belongings.
Unlikely items made the cut. In 2003, when we moved to Doha, Qatar, I discovered a nearby store, the LuLu (which means lovely large pearl), where a gallon of Al Rifai milk came with a free coffee cup sturdily taped to it. I was delighted. I’ve always believed good design does not necessarily correlate with price – and these cups were a perfect size and had these wonderful scenes from Doha life, where there was a dhow harbor in the center of town, dhows in the harbor, and camel races with human riders on Saturdays. Look! The dhow coffee cup even has a wind tower in the background.
So yesterday, Christmas Day, as I opened two beautiful new coffee cups, one from Giverney and one from Barcelona, my husband looked at me sorrowfully, and approached the subject gently.
“It’s time we give up the Doha coffee cups,” he said.
“They have served us well. They are over 20 years old. They were free, probably made in China from materials we don’t even want to think about. I use them all the time, and even as I do, I wonder what might be leaching into my drink.”
I know he is right. There is no marking of any kind to indicate origin. After all these years, marks are appearing where we have stirred for twenty years. And yet – these cups have served me loyally. They are still bright and unmarred. I love their memorialization of a slower time in Doha. And I have options.
At Christmas breakfast, I have the cups out on display and offer them to my son. He is a discerning collector of first editions by selected authors, first edition Legos from the space exploration collections, edged weapons, and selected items that catch his attention. He also knows how to buy and sell on the Internet when he wants to refine his collections.
He expresses interest but does not take them with him. Their departure, however, is Christmas Day chaotic – bags full of presents, the food divided to be used for quick meals in the coming week (even our grandchildren contributed to our Christmas Eve dinner, my grandson a crab dip and my granddaughter a wreath made of crescent roll wrapped little smokies. My son, who was never interested in cooking, astonished us with a baked Brie!) and last-minute check-ins on upcoming family plans.
I am a patient woman. I know those cups deserve to find new appreciation in a new home. I believe my son will get involved but if not, I have other options.
Update: This is what it is like to be me. It is not that I am getting older, it is that I will tell you things I believe to be true, and they are close, but not the same.
My friend Yusuf, below, said he thought it must be Al Marai, and that sounded familiar. AdventureMan said maybe really we should keep the cups, and as he handled them, He found Al Marai logos on the cups. Not just one. Two on each cup.
In our family, we are all very very sure we are right. When we are not right, we are required to humbly state it. I was wrong, so very very wrong; the cups were labeled, Al Marai, not Al Rifai, and YOU, Yusef and AdventureMan, were RIGHT.
And we are keeping the cups!
Thank You, Montana
A moment of clarity and good will brought to us by one of the manliest, reddest states in the
USA. Every family has individuals with gender issues. We’ve learned not to demonize our brothers and sisters, not to punish them for the way they are wired. Thank you, Montana for a breath of fresh air and good sense. Thank you, Washington Post, for a lucid exposition of the actions taken.
With GOP help, Montana lawmakers vote down transgender bathroom rule
The measure would have barred Rep. Zooey Zephyr from using women’s bathrooms near the House and Senate chambers.
Montana state Rep. Zooey Zephyr (D) stands in protest on the House floor on April 24, 2023 at the state Capitol in Helena. (Thom Bridge/Independent Record/AP)
Several Montana Republicans joined Democrats on Tuesday to block a measure that would have barred transgender lawmakers from using the state Capitol bathrooms that aligned with their gender identities.
The proposed measure would have banned Rep. Zooey Zephyr, a transgender Democratic lawmaker who was reelected in November, from using the women’s bathroom outside Montana’s House and Senate chambers. Last year, Zephyr was silenced in the House after speaking out against her Republican colleagues for their support of a ban on gender-affirming care for transgender children.
Weeks ahead of her return to the House floor, Zephyr’s colleagues in the chamber rejected the bathroom measure in a 12-10 vote. Three Republicans joined Democrats in voting against it, characterizing it as a rule that would not add value to their work while also noting they didn’t necessarily disagree with the ideology driving it.
Zephyr told The Washington Post on Wednesday that she was grateful to her GOP colleagues who voted “no.” She said she has a “good working relationship” with them, adding that their votes against the measure showed they were “able to recognize this for the distraction that it is.”
(Created with Datawrapper/The Washington Post)
Anti-trans bills have doubled since 2022. Our map shows where states stand.
“I hope that it serves as a signal to other Republicans across the country that there are more important things that governments should be focusing on besides targeting transgender people,” Zephyr said.
Montana’s measure paralleled a resolution introduced by Rep. Nancy Mace (R-South Carolina) last month that proposed changing House rules to ban trans lawmakers and visitors to the U.S. Capitol from using bathrooms associated with their gender identity. Mace’s resolution came two weeks after Sarah McBride, a Democrat from Delaware, became the first openly trans person elected to Congress.
Ahead of Tuesday’s vote, state Rep. David Bedey (R) said he would “reluctantly” cast a “no” vote, describing the measure as “a distraction.” Bedey, though, also made clear that he still had his “own opinion” on gender dysphoria, which he said was a “scientific issue actually that needs to be resolved.”
“This particular action will have the effect of making people famous in the national news and will not contribute to the effective conduct of our business,” Bedey said.
The Montana legislature made headlines across the country in April 2023, when the House was discussing four anti-trans bills — one of them a ban on gender-affirming care for trans children.
During an April 18 debate on the House floor, Zephyr said restricting access to care for trans minors was “tantamount to torture.”
“This body should be ashamed,” she said.
Later on in her remarks, addressing colleagues supporting the ban, Zephyr said: “I hope the next time there’s an invocation, when you bow your heads in prayer, you see the blood on your hands.”
Afterward, GOP leaders in the House silenced Zephyr, declining to recognize her during debate for days. Protests ensued, and about one week later, Zephyr’s Republican colleagues voted to formally punish her, saying that her comments were derogatory and that she had violated decorum in the legislature.
Zephyr was no longer allowed to debate and could only vote remotely.
Montana’s legislature did not meet this year, meaning Zephyr’s reelection last month opened the door for her to return to the House floor in January for the first time in 19 months.
On Tuesday, the Joint Rules Committee met to discuss amending rules ahead of the new legislative session, including the bathroom measure.
State Rep. Jerry Schillinger opened the discussion by saying that the proposal put forth a “relatively simple rule change.”
“It says what probably shouldn’t need to be said and puts into rules what probably shouldn’t need to be put into rules,” Schillinger said.
Multiple Republicans agreed with him.
State Rep. Jedediah Hinkle (R) said he knew multiple lawmakers who did not use the women’s bathroom outside the House and Senate chambers, adding that they walked across the Capitol to use a different one because they were uncomfortable “being in the same bathroom with a man,” an apparentreference to Zephyr.
He urged his colleagues to help Montana set an early precedent as lawmakers around the country are beginning to confront the same issue in legislative buildings.
Hinkle did not call out Zephyr by name but indirectly referenced her in his argument supporting the measure.
“We have one representative right now, but in the future, we could have many,” Hinkle said. “This could be an ongoing thing, and I think it’s time that this body addresses this issue now, as they are addressing it nationally.”
During the last legislative session, Hinkle said, lawmakers had installed locks on the doors leading into multi-stall bathrooms to permit individual legislators to use them alone if they desired.But that accommodation did not work, he said, adding that it kept lawmakers from their duties. Bedey, one of the Republicans who voted against the measure, later countered Hinkle’s point, saying that there was no evidence that lawmakers had missed votes.
Otherwise, Bedey said, he “might have a different opinion.” Following about 12 minutes of discussion, the measure passed in the Senate committee, 11-7. But the House voted it down, aided by the Republican votes. Zephyr commended her GOP colleagues who voted against it.
“I think those Republicans are likely talking to people in their district who are also saying, ‘Listen, people of Montana are struggling right now,’” Zephyr told The Post.
She said Wednesday that there were issues — including housing and health care — to address in the months to come, and a measure about the Montana Capitol bathrooms “is not helpful for the work that we were sent here to do.”
What Love Looks Like at 76
I’m on my way down to restock the Little Free Library and pass AdventureMan, who always asks me why I love him. It’s hard to keep it fresh. It’s hard to find new answers to that question, but this time, it’s right there in front of me.
“Who likes to clean out the litter box?” I ask. He looks puzzled.
“No-one!” I answer my own question, but I continue “I love you because you clean out the litter box in hot humid weather, even when you don’t want to, and give the cats a nice clean place to poop! I love you because you do it faithfully, and I don’t have to do it! It’s not romantic, but I consider it TRUE LOVE!”
It makes him laugh. I am not the romantic young bride he met in Heidelberg and married six weeks later. I am pragmatic and grounded. I know what matters.
We have always had cats. I used to do the litter boxes, and when I got pregnant, he took it over because pregnant women can get a disease that can infect the baby. Around when our son turned 18 he had a perplexed look on his face and asked me “just how long after the baby is born can you scoop litter again?” and we both laughed.
True love is bigger than diamonds or white roses or wonderful perfume. True love is scooping the cat litter and cleaning out the litter boxes. Thank you, AdventureMan.
“We Call Her Meanie”
We are sitting in our backyard with our neighbor, Marvin’s person, and I asked her if she had ever had any other cats, or knew of any other cats in our neighborhood, who were neutered and microchipped but didn’t seem to belong to anyone. I had my reasons.
She named a couple – Cindy Clawford, and one we call Fuzzy Tail, and Goblin. And then she says
“And there was one, we call her Meanie, who used to hang around, but I haven’t seen her for a long time.”
I didn’t say anything. “Meanie” is likely the cat who bit my hand the first time I fed her, she was so hungry and had no manners. I had to have antibiotics for the first time in 30 years, and a shot of some kind. She wanted to live with us but she was too feral. She lived outside for a year.
It was a very very hot summer, and she had a thick fur coat. When Goblin or another cat would go after her, she would run to the drain in the street and hide inside. We were terrified we would find her body in the street one day. And it was hot, too hot for her to live on our porch living in a fur coat. AdventureMan wanted to bring her in. She adored him.
A friend helped us trap her to get her neutered – and we discovered she was already neutered and chipped, but had no registered owner.
“Meanie” was a scary cat. You couldn’t move too fast or she would hiss, and occasionally lash out with her sharp claws, or even bite. We have to keep the door closed between the front and back areas of our house so she won’t attack our two very domestic male cats. Slowly, slowly, we have gained her trust and she is learning manners which are more suitable for living with people. We have taught her to cuddle, by moving slowly with her. She no longer bites. She no longer uses her sharp claws, except to knead when she is cuddling, purring and happy. (Ouch!)
We call her Zenobia, after the warrior queen of the Syrian desert, who ruled in Palmyra.
Ghosted – A Happy Ending
Our housekeeper, staying in our house as we travel, sent this photo to us the day after we left Pensacola. This old, wobbly, emaciated cat showed up hungry! She fed him and asked me what we wanted to do.
We’ve never seen this cat before. We have a flock of known outdoor cats we help, and this isn’t one of them. This cat appears wretched. We asked that she continue to feed him, and add some beef broth to make sure he gets enough hydration. She checks with a mutual friend, a cat consultant with Everett Animal Welfare group, who gives us advice.
When we return, he is still alive, and looking a little better, we think. We take him to the vet; the vet requires a name and we decide to call him Sunny, for his always loving and uncomplaining personality.
The vet has sad news. He runs all the tests, the cat is negative for feline AIDS, and other diseases, but his thyroid is shot and his kidneys are on their last legs. He is not microchipped. There is nothing the vet can do, and he tells us to make Sunny comfortable and enjoy these last weeks of his life.
Sunny can barely walk, but he doesn’t know he is sick. He bleeds from the mouth, his teeth hurt him so we buy him special food. He never tucks right into his food, he always politely demands we pet him around the head and scratch under his chin. He rolls on the ground and fondles our shoes. Then he eats. And eats. And eats. He also drinks, but because he is so arthritic, we provide a bucket for him so he doesn’t have to bend down. We are happy, because while he is not strong, he does not appear terminal, and he does not appear to have pain, other than he can barely walk.
And then, last night, he disappeared.
From the day he came, he has not moved around too much, other than to be a little private in his eliminations. When we leave, we always check to see where he is and run for the car. Sometimes, if he is under AdventureMan’s car, we take my car. He is always there, and rises to greet us when we return. He greeted us when we returned from lunch yesterday. I saw him sleeping around 3. And then, we never saw him again.
He didn’t show up for his dinner (!!!) and he wasn’t helping AdventureMan with watering the plants. He was gone, as mysteriously as he had appeared. Ghosted.
He broke AdventureMan’s heart, who had quickly bonded with Sunny. He was up and down all night, checking hopefully to see if he had returned. I was sure he would show up this morning, hungry for breakfast, but no Sunny.
I was just putting away the ironing board when AdventureMan came running out this morning saying “You are NOT going to believe this.” He had his phone in his hand, but I thought maybe he had seen Sunny outside. No, he hadn’t. But he had sent a text to our up-the-hill neighbor, asking her to keep an eye out for this emaciated old cat we had been taking care of.
Her response was astonishing. “That’s Marvin!” she texted. He had disappeared when we left for Paris, and they had been looking for him. Then they got really sick with COVID and had to take care of themselves and lost hope of ever seeing Marvin again. And Marvin returned home yesterday!
I remembered Marvin – a big, fat, fluffy cat who ran around their yard in the company of their ancient aunt, who adored him. That this tiny (maybe 3 – 4 pounds) cat could be Marvin was a shocker, but happy news.
This Sunny, who turns out to be Marvin, is safely home. No wonder he is such a happy cat – he is 18 years old and has been loved all his life. His appearance at our house was a mystery – how could such a weak cat get to our house? Could he have been dumped? The mystery is solved, our neighbor is ecstatic, and we are happy to know that Sonny/Marvin will live and end his life in comfort and a loving environment. She’s glad he was taken care of during the weeks of is absence. I call that a happy ending.
Tauck Ms. Sapphire: En Route to Versailles
As we are packing, we keep the curtains – and our eyes – open. We are watching for La Roche-Guyon, an ancient castle confiscated by Rommel to be used as his headquarters. I know this because AdventureMan tells me. Several times. He is excited. When we passed it the last time, he was asleep. This time, we will see it.
But first, there is a youth competition we have to see. Kamel, the Cruise Director, is hilarious. He has rules, but they are his rules, and while mostly fair, the outcome seems to benefit the maximum number of people possible, and this is truly a gift.
Todays competitions are hilarious! A race with an egg in a spoon held in your mouth! Successfully hoola-hooping, and racing around the lounge. Stacking your team shoes. Who can wrap the best mummy? The youth go at it with focused enthusiasm – they want to win! Kamel expertly corrals the excited, yelling, screaming parents.
Balloon Volley Ball
And he got the youth to clean up the mess!
Passing fascinating scenes
La Roche-Guyon!
And we go through the locks. It is a tight fit!
Free at last!
Tauck Seine: Les Andelys and Chateau Gaillard
You can see the Seine twist and turn as it flows from Paris to Vernon (and Giverny) and to Chateau Gaillard.
We dock in Les Andelys to hike up to Chateau Gaillard, a castle built by Richard the Lionheart in record time, and later used by King Philip the Fair to jail his adulterous daughters-in-law.
The Church, Notre Dame, shows signs of needing repair, but the French government is currently strapped for cash. In front of the church, the guide pointed to a statue, and said “This is Jesus.”
You can see signs of water damage on the walls. I can’t imagine what it would take to fix that and make it waterproof.
We have little sprinkles of rain, the first we have seen, and fortunately it is a rare occurrence on this trip.
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