The Year of the Secret Santa
One year AdventureMan was attending school in Ft. Leavenworth, Kansas, a special school to train men who aspired to the highest ranks of the military. There were lots and lots of families, all approximately the same age group, and there were lots of family activities. For many of us, it was one of the few times we were stationed in the United States. It was also a high-testosterone, highly competitive environment.
We lived on a small, unique street, about half students and half permanent party – teachers, instructors, people who were not part of the huge student cadre. The “old-timers” organized us into a neighborhood. We had block parties, we babysat one another’s kids, we went to auctions together, and we kept each other’s secrets. Best of all – they introduced us to Secret Santa.
Just before Thanksgiving, we had a potluck and drew names. Each family drew the name of another family, and until the Christmas party, when you revealed whose name you had, you acted as Secret Santa to that family.
It’s funny – I can’t remember all the things that were done for us or things we did for our family; all I can remember is that we had a LOT of fun, and not a single one of us knew who our Secret Santa was. I remember that one of the guest speakers at the school was an old friend of my husband’s. He came to dinner at our house, and after dinner, we asked him to move his car to our Secret Santa family, and then deliver a breakfast bread to them. He was sort-of famous, and when he showed up at the Secret Santa family with the bread, we were hiding upstairs in a darkened bedroom, watching, and we could see the amazement on their faces when this revered gentleman delivered the bread. They were astounded he would be delivering their Secret Santa gift, and they could not imagine whose friend he might be. Oh, what fun!
Baked goods, toys, snow shoveled off the walks, handmade Christmas ornaments – it was all so much fun. At the Christmas dinner, when we all revealed who we had been Santa to, there were shouts of joy and whoops of laughter. Best of all, it really knit us together as a neighborhood, doing good to one another. It was one of the very best Christmas times I can remember.
Good Morning, Kuwait
Another gorgeous winter day dawning in Kuwait, with a high expected around 77°R/25°C today, while my poor family in the US is shivering with cold. I have a good friend who had three different family members stranded in three different airports, trying to get home for Christmas, and snow accumulating up to 18 inches while she prays for their safe arrivals.
Have a sweet day, Kuwait. 🙂
I will spend the day preparing for major meals on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Mom, I am making your Cranberry Salad. 🙂
Christmas In Kuwait 2008
I’ve lived in so many Islamic countries, and I have never seen an Islamic country that celebrates – or allows the expat population to celebrate – Christmas – so lavishly.
In some countries, you live on rumors. Can the compound residents put up Christmas lights this year? (Yes! And all your Moslem neighbors put up lights, too, and the compound is like a fairy-land, and people walk around in groups at night ooooh-ing and aaaah-ing over the fanciful displays) or is this the year when it’s all word-of-mouth about the Indian grocer who has Christmas trees hidden in his back room but there is ne’ry a Christmas decoration to be seen on the streets or in the windows, and people are told not to decorate or to draw any attention to themselves . . .
Not so in Kuwait. Thanks be to God for religious tolerance here, allowing us to decorate for Christmas, allowing us to celebrate according to our private beliefs.
For my stateside and European virtual visitors, here are some of the Kuwait Christmas sights this year:
As we were waiting for our flight back to Kuwait, AdventureMan overheard several students talking about their experiences.
“You should see New York!” one student was saying, “There is even a big sign saying ‘Happy Birthday, Jesus!'” and they all laughed.
Why do you think we are so happy, dear ones? Why do you think we celebrate? Why do you think we get together and sing joyful songs, and try to delight one another with special, thought-filled presents? The greatest gift of all, we believe, is born on Christmas Day!
Qatteri Cat Says “Whaaaaaat?”
Those little eyes look SO innocent, don’t they?
Don’t believe it for a moment!
Every morning, I have to gather up ornaments that have been knocked off. I have to glue them back together (I don’t hang anything very valuable on the lower branches, but it is annoying to have to glue things back all the time.)
He had his eye on one ornament and I said his name. He looked at me. His eyes said “Whaaaaaaat” you know, that three syllable what that means “why do you think I would do something like that” when you are thinking of doing something like that.
You don’t fool me one bit, Qattari Cat.
Christmas Ornaments from Here, There and Everywhere
Ten years ago when we put almost our entire life into storage, we had no idea we would be gone this long. We had no idea we would live in four different countries, and that we wouldn’t see our things again for lo, these many years.
Our first contract, I was allowed one thousand pounds. Do you know how little one thousand pounds is? Think clothing, think basic necessities – 1000 lbs. just isn’t very much.
I packed just a very few Christmas ornaments, figuring I could pick things up along the way. Fortunately for us, the next country, after Saudi Arabia, was Germany, the land of Christmas ornaments. Our tree is eclectic. It’s not necessarily a tree with appeal to anyone else; it is a very personal Christmas tree, with lots of memories and stories. Lucky for you, I won’t bore you will all of them. 😉
We are sentimental. When we can, we decorate the tree together, and we remember with each ornament. . . When he was young, our son would get so impatient with us, and our remembering!
Here is the very first ornament our son ever made in school – it is a dreamcatcher; his teacher was very into the American Southwest and American Indian traditions:
We met and married in Heidelberg, so we always have that ornament with us:
My ties to the Pacific Northwest:
AdventureMan’s love of Africa and the Middle East:
Religious symbols:
Beautiful German antique silver walnuts and pinecones:
And memories of places we’ll remember . . .
Whew! I’m tired, too! Think I will go join the Qatteri Cat in a catnap!
Brrrr. . . . Shiver . . . Cold in Kuwait
When I checked my WeatherUnderground readings for this morning, I laughed when I saw that the weather at 0630 in Kuwait was exactly the same as in Damascus, Syria, and colder than Seattle! Oh you disbelievers! Here is what it looked like:
It is going to be another GORGEOUS day in Kuwait – cold, clear and sunshiny. OK, AdventureMan, you are right . . . it is nice to have sunshine every day. 🙂
As lovely as it is, this weather is very hard on the poor, without adequate protection from the cold. Please, if you are feeling generous, please help out the good people at Operation Hope – Kuwait as they gather gently used shoes, coats and warm bedding to distribute to the poorest of the poor. No matter what you can give (they can always use your monetary donations, too!) every penny will benefit those who need it the most – the very very poor.
Qatteri Cat Trims the Tree
3:30 in the morning, and I am wide-awake. I can lie in bad and toss and turn, or I can get up and make use of all this energy now and take a nap later, which is what I decide to do. I want to get a Christmas tree up, and I am hoping Qatteri Cat will not take too much interest. Two years ago, he pulled the tree over in the middle of the night, utter chaos.
Toss a load of laundry in the washer, pull down the tree box, get it set up, lights on – it’s great putting on lights while it is still dark out (I can see the ring of fishing boats along the horizon, and I shiver, thinking it must be really, really cold out there with the near zero Centigrade overnight temperatures) because I can see where I am putting them and how they will look when it is all finished, not too many lights in one area and big empty spaces elsewhere.
And then – the ornaments. When I have my own house, I usually have one big tree in the living room and one smaller one in the family room. The big tree has all the beautiful ornaments we have collected over the years, and the smaller tree is usually a theme tree – Maybe all red and white, pepperminty, one year and all blue and silver another. It’s my experiment tree. But we never mess with the serious family tree – it is thoroughly eclectic, and that is the way we want it to be. Hmmm. I think I will do a separate entry later on the ornaments.
The lights are on – just as the sky is beginning to lighten, the Qatteri Can and I finish up. The Qatteri Cat goes and gets his babies to share the tree with. Thanks be to God, he is not showing any interest in pulling on anything this year. We enjoy the lights together.
We put on Christmas music and I get a cup of coffee so I can sit and see if the tree needs more. Here is one of my very favorite Christmas CD’s (I have a collection of very old Christmas music, along with some very good more recent Christmas music)
The Qatteri Cat says he is finished. He is exhausted. He is going to take a nap. Wouldn’t it be nice, to have the life of a housecat?
Jailed for Headscarf?
It’s a good think I read this article all the way through before I published it. I thought it was about a woman getting arrested for wearing hijab. She was not arrested for wearing hijab. Read the last sentence in the article. She was turned away from the courtroom for wearing hijab – that’s bad enough. She was arrested when she swore at the bailiff (an officer of the court who preserves a dignified atmosphere in the courtroom, or tries to.)
I suspect this policy is more a gang thing – prohibiting headgear that would cause an outbreak of violence in the court – but that it was enforced in ignorance and protest against this Muslim-American woman. They released her quickly once threatened with investigation.
Sikhs won the right to wear their headgear while serving in the US military, as a religious right. I am betting Muslim women can win the right to wear hijab – it just needs to be tested in the courts. I do not think they can win the right to wear niqab, or other face coverings into the court – it isn’t a religious requirement, and the safety of the court can’t be protected if you don’t know who you are letting into the courtroom.
ATLANTA (Dec. 17) – A Muslim woman arrested for refusing to take off her head scarf at a courthouse security checkpoint said Wednesday that she felt her human and civil rights were violated.
‘Stripped of My … Human Rights’
A Georgia judge ordered Lisa Valentine, above at her home in Douglasville, to serve 10 days in jail for refusing to take her head scarf off in court Tuesday. The Muslim, who had violated a policy that prohibits any headgear, was released Wednesday after an advocacy group called for a federal probe into the matter.
A judge ordered Lisa Valentine, 40, to serve 10 days in jail for contempt of court, said police in Douglasville, a city of about 20,000 people on Atlanta’s west suburban outskirts.
Valentine violated a court policy that prohibits people from wearing any headgear in court, police said after they arrested her Tuesday.
Kelley Jackson, a spokeswoman for Georgia Attorney General Thurbert Baker, said state law doesn’t permit or prohibit head scarfs.
“It’s at the discretion of the judge and the sheriffs and is up to the security officers in the court house to enforce their decision,” she said.
Valentine, who recently moved to Georgia from New Haven, Conn., said the incident reminded her of stories she’d heard of the civil rights-era South.
“I just felt stripped of my civil, my human rights,” she said Wednesday from her home. She said she was unexpectedly released after the Washington-based Council on American-Islamic Relations urged federal authorities to investigate the incident as well as others in Georgia.
The group cited a report that the same judge removed a woman and her 14-year-old daughter from the courtroom last week because they were wearing Muslim head scarves.
Jail officials declined to say why she was freed and municipal Court Judge Keith Rollins said that “it would not be appropriate” for him to comment on the case.
Last year, a judge in Valdosta in southern Georgia barred a Muslim woman from entering a courtroom because she would not remove her head scarf. There have been similar cases in other states, including Michigan, where a Muslim woman in Detroit filed a federal lawsuit in February 2007 after a judge dismissed her small-claims court case when she refused to remove a head and face veil.
Valentine’s husband, Omar Hall, said his wife was accompanying her nephew to a traffic citation hearing when officials stopped her at the metal detector and told her she would not be allowed in the courtroom with the head scarf, known as a hijab.
Hall said Valentine, an insurance underwriter, told the bailiff that she had been in courtrooms before with the scarf on and that removing it would be a religious violation. When she turned to leave and uttered an expletive, Hall said a bailiff handcuffed her and took her before the judge.
Associated Press writer Kate Brumback in Atlanta contributed to this report.
Tai Ho in Kenmore, revisited
I can never go back to Seattle without touching bases with my best friend from college, we never miss a beat, once we are back together, even after all these years, it’s just all about catching up, and there is never a dull moment. It is particularly delightful to me that she and my husband also get along so well.
Many times, with her busy schedule, with my blowing into town for a short time, we have to catch what time we can together. Last time I was there, she introduced me to Tai Ho, and oh! WOW!
This time we ordered totally different things – and the food was equally delicious. Wontons, Dumplings, Noodle Soup with Chinese Pickles, Shrimp with vegetables, and Chicken with Black Beans and garlic – great food, even better conversation, and an wonderful, unforgettable evening. Everything was delicious, but the noodle soup was my hands-down favorite. They make their own noodles, and on a cold night, oh, hot Chinese noodle soup – my favorite.
An Eye for an Eye – Does Revenge Change Anything?
I have been following my own post with interest. The truth is, there is a huge part of me that agrees with you, agrees with Ameneh, who wants her attacker to suffer as she has suffered, to pay for the life he has stolen from her.
I used to be a lot more idealistic than I am now. I can remember the two times in my life I came face-to-face with who I am, viscerally, in my gut.
The first time, I was living in Jordan, and I awoke in the middle of the night. I heard gunfire. My husband was out of town – that happened a lot. Things like cars breaking down, heaters going out in the dead of winter, ants attacking (don’t even ask), those things always waited for my husband to be out of town. Now gunfire.
I finally called my British neighbors, who called their Security office, who said it was probably just the police shooting packs of dogs who attacked the sheep at night.
I knew, though, that night, that if I had a gun in the house, I would shoot anyone who came through the front door to protect my son. I had never thought of myself that way. I had never considered myself a killer. And I knew I could kill, without a second thought, to protect my son.
We all have times when we find out who we are, what we are made of. Men who go off to war and kill for a living have to live with their actions for the rest of their lives. Many, many live with regrets.
People who lived through the Invasion of Kuwait endured and suffered unimaginable horrors. Many won’t even talk about the things they saw or had to do.
Here is my problem with revenge – you have to live with the consequences.
If I had shot an intruder, even thinking it was a criminal, I would have to live with that the rest of my life. Even NOT shooting an intruder, I have to live with the thought that I would have, that I was fully prepared to kill. It still haunts me, even though I didn’t do anything, even though I just thought about it.
I like what This Lady said. I want this man punished, but if we choose to inflict the same punishment on him, don’t we lower ourselves to his level? I think life imprisonment would be worse. On another blog, dealing with the same topic, one Iranian woman wrote that if this man is blinded, some female in his family will be chosen to take care of him for the rest of his life, feeding him, preparing his meals. She, too, will be sacrificed, lose her own life to the obligation of taking care of this blinded villain for the rest of his life. Wouldn’t we all be better off if he were locked away, never to be free again?
I published the photo with the original article because I was shocked and intrigued by it. In spite of her blindness and disfigurement, this woman is laughing, and her mother is hugging her. In many ways, her life is blessed. Because God works in amazing and wonderful ways, we know that he can use this terrible act to do great things in her life, bring her peace, bring her new understanding . . . we don’t know what he can do, but we can trust that her life is not over, that he can still use her to fulfill his purpose in this world.
Reading your comments, trying to find my own response has been a challenge. As I said – if it were me, if it were my sister, God forbid – I know I would want revenge. I know that fiery outrage lives in all our hearts; the desire to take an eye for an eye. I know that dragon in my own heart.
And yet . . . I am left with this very uneasy feeling that revenge and retribution are neither deterrent, nor satisfying. I trust that if this sentence is carried out, God can even do great things with this violent assailant, that he can work in his heart and give him a new way of seeing, he can bring him to repentance, he can do great works, even in the heart of this sinner.
My greatest, gravest concern is for Ameneh. She seems to be a very stable, courageous woman. I fear that revenge can act as a poison in her soul, that the punishment, if inflicted, will eat away at all the goodness of her life. I fear for any of us who become obsessed with revenge at the cost of who we were created to be.
You have been very forceful in your expression of belief that the sentence should be imposed. Don’t you harbor any misgivings about this, no matter how small?
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