Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

“I Look Deep Inside . . .”

We were at one of those official dinners, and, as is my habit, I found someone even more shy than I am and started asking questions. It’s an old trick; it gets me through the most endless affair. She turned out to be very smart, very witty and entertaining, this Nigerian woman, so elegant, so well-mannered. We were having a great conversation.

“So what do you do in Kuwait?” I asked, almost yawning, I was so ashamed of myself for asking such a boring, common question.

She paused, looking at me like she was measuring me.

“I look deep within people, and I tell them things about themselves they never knew,” she responded.

“Oh no!” I thought to myself, “is she some kind of fortune-teller?” (Fortune tellers are strictly forbidden in my religion.) I’m usually pretty good with the old poker-face, but my eyes probably shifted, looking quickly for a polite exit.

She watched me, her eyes twinkling, grinning like a fisherman with a live one on the hook.

“I’m a radiologist,” she added, and we both cracked up. She really had me: baited me, caught me, hooked me good, and then did the old catch-and-release.

April 7, 2009 Posted by | Character, Community, ExPat Life, Friends & Friendship, Health Issues, Humor, Joke, Kuwait, Living Conditions, Spiritual | 8 Comments

St. Oscar Romero

I didn’t even know we had a St. Oscar Romero, so when it came up on my screen, this morning as I was doing my daily lectionary readings I took a little time to read about him.

What an incredible man – and a modern day saint, too, a man for our times:

OSCAR ROMERO
ARCHBISHOP OF SAN SALVADOR, AND THE MARTYRS OF EL SALVADOR

(24 March 1980)
Óscar Arnulfo Romero y Galdámez (August 15, 1917 – March 24, 1980), commonly known as Monseñor Romero, was a priest of the Roman Catholic Church in El Salvador. He later became prelate archbishop of San Salvador.

As an archbishop, he witnessed numerous violations of human rights and began a ministry speaking out on behalf of the poor and victims of the country’s civil war. His brand of political activism was denounced by the hierarchy of the Roman Catholic Church and the government of El Salvador. In 1980, he was assassinated by gunshot while consecrating the Eucharist during mass. His death finally provoked international outcry for human rights reform in El Salvador.

In 1997, a cause for beatification and canonization into sainthood was opened for Romero and Pope John Paul II bestowed upon him the title of Servant of God. The process continues. He is considered the unofficial patron saint of the Americas and El Salvador and is often referred to as “San Romero” in El Salvador. Outside of Catholicism Romero is honored by other religious denominations of Christendom, like the Church of England through its Common Worship. He is one of the ten 20th-century martyrs from across the world who are depicted in statues above the Great West Door of Westminster Abbey, London.

You don’t have to be perfect to be a saint, in fact in the reading for today, St. Paul writes that “22 For I delight in the law of God in my inmost self, 23 but I see in my members another law at war with the law of my mind, making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. 24 Wretched man that I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? 25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!

So then, with my mind I am a slave to the law of God, but with my flesh I am a slave to the law of sin.

We cannot, in our own strength do right all the time, even if we want to choose rightly. Oscar Romero may not have been perfect (because none of us are, it’s not like I know anything scandalous about him) but he dedicated himself to righting a major wrong he saw in society, and his persistence and dedication ended up causing his death.

March 24, 2009 Posted by | Biography, Character, Cross Cultural, Leadership, Lent, Social Issues, Spiritual | 4 Comments

Icons Challenge, The Locard Principle 2: The Middle East and Me

The best thing, the very best thing about blogging, for me, is what I learn from my commenters. The old Locard’s Exchange Principle is a constant in life – with every interaction, a part of you rubs off on me, and a part of me rubs off on you. It’s why we’re careful about the people, books, movies, blogs and ideas we spend time with. . . we either feel better for hanging around them, or slightly uncomfortable. Sometimes, hugely uncomfortable. The internet is a microcosm, good and evil all mixed in together and we make our choices.

Fragonard:  The Reader

Fragonard: The Reader

Above: that is me. That’s pretty much who I am. I am quiet, I am a reader. I still get input, from newspapers, books, e-mails, the internet, friends, groups, etc.

What I love about blogging is that I throw something out, and you throw something back. Many many times, what I get back is unexpected, and forces me to re-examine my assumptions. Many times, I have to force myself to stop. Not to respond. I have to force myself to let the new information, new point-of-view sink in, percolate, settle. Minds don’t change in an instant, but . . . they do change. New information brings new, often surprising, perspectives. When I find myself getting angry, I have to step back and ask myself “what is going on here? What are you reacting to?” It helps me to know myself better, and it helps me to understand whatever-little-corner-of-the-world-I-am-living-in better, too.

There are about six different blog entries radiating out like a spider’s web from the thoughts I am now thinking, fed by your input and comments, and behind the scenes e-mails back and forth with new thoughts.

So here is my challenge for today. I’ve shown you one of my life icons, this Fragonard paining, The Reader.

Your mission, your challenge – identify / find a piece of art that shows us who you are. Post it on your blog and link here with a comment, or send it to me, and I will publish it.

(No graphic violence or pornography; I won’t publish it and I will break the link if you publish it on your blog and link to me.)

March 18, 2009 Posted by | Arts & Handicrafts, Beauty, Blogging, Community, Cultural, ExPat Life, Kuwait, Locard Exchange Principal, Random Musings, Relationships, Spiritual | 7 Comments

The Wedding at Cana

This is one of my favorite readings in the Gospels, for all it’s humanity. Some scholars theorize that the wedding was close family – from living here, I had to eliminate all the European paintings which show the men and women celebrating together – I am guessing the wedding feast would be more like the ones held here; men and women celebrating separately.

Disaster – there isn’t enough wine for the guests. Mary goes to her son and tells him “there isn’t enough wine.” He responds with “Mom! I’m not ready!” I imagine her giving him a long, level look and then turning to the servants and saying “Do whatever he tells you to do.” She is his Mom, after all. And, ready or not, he honors his Mom, and the wine is good.

wedding_in_cana007

The Wedding at Cana

John 2:1-12

2 On the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. 2 Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. 3 When the wine gave out, the mother of Jesus said to him, ‘They have no wine.’ 4 And Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, what concern is that to you and to me? My hour has not yet come.’ 5 His mother said to the servants, ‘Do whatever he tells you.’ 6 Now standing there were six stone water-jars for the Jewish rites of purification, each holding twenty or thirty gallons. 7 Jesus said to them, ‘Fill the jars with water.’ And they filled them up to the brim. 8 He said to them, ‘Now draw some out, and take it to the chief steward.’ So they took it. 9 When the steward tasted the water that had become wine, and did not know where it came from (though the servants who had drawn the water knew), the steward called the bridegroom 10 and said to him, ‘Everyone serves the good wine first, and then the inferior wine after the guests have become drunk. But you have kept the good wine until now.’ 11 Jesus did this, the first of his signs, in Cana of Galilee, and revealed his glory; and his disciples believed in him.

12 After this he went down to Capernaum with his mother, his brothers, and his disciples; and they remained there for a few days.

March 2, 2009 Posted by | Family Issues, Marriage, Social Issues, Spiritual | 1 Comment

“I’m Melting! I’m Melting!”

At our church this weekend, our priest was making a point, using water, and he sprinkled various members of the congregation, to a series of “eeeeekks!”

I was reminded of several years ago – we had bought a new house, and our church has a special ceremony of blessing for a residence. As the priest carefully points out, he/she is not actually blessing the house, but blessing the inhabitants – nonetheless, every room has a special prayer, and the priest sprinkles a little holy water in each room.

funny pictures of cats with captions
more animals

As he sprinkled the water in one room, some hit my youngest sister, Sparkle. I watched her struggle not to do it, but she couldn’t resist.

“Ohhhh, I’m melting, I’m melting!” she cried out, like the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz.

Thank God, the priest was a good friend. He paused, looked at me and said “she is YOUR sister?” I nodded. He sighed, before continuing, and said “why am I not surprised?”

March 2, 2009 Posted by | Biography, Character, Community, Cultural, Family Issues, Friends & Friendship, Humor, Living Conditions, Relationships, Spiritual | 6 Comments

Lenten Challenge

In church this week, our priest spoke of the necessity of listening – and hearing. He spoke of how important it is to be fully present for our spouses, our children, not just listening with half an ear and going “um hmmm, um hmmmm” (ulp! guilty!) He also spoke of how hard it is to truly listen and to hear when our minds are unquiet, and we have a lot going on in our lives.

Lent starts with Ash Wednesday – this week.

I am tempted to give up extra noise for lent – to live a more silent and contemplative life.

Here is the problem – I love silence. I do listen to BBC when I am in my project room or in my car, but other than that, I don’t fill my life with a lot of noise. Silence is my friend. So for me, seeking more silence is not such a good thing, it is more like feeding an addiction. Listening to BBC is, for me, probably a good thing, keeping me more connected to the world, less in my ivory tower. It confronts me with problems in the world, and inspires me with people who seek to make a difference, even in a small way.

But that is not the point. The main point is to be fully present, to listen to those who are speaking and to hear the heart behind the words, and to love them as Christ loves us. I know that silence is not my solution, that paying attention is the real test. Focusing, paying attention – that is a real challenge.

It would be easier to give up chocolate!

February 23, 2009 Posted by | Character, ExPat Life, Kuwait, Lent, Spiritual | 9 Comments

Khaled Aljenfawi: Tolerance Begins at Home

An extraordinary article from today’s Arab Times:

Tolerance usually begins at home
By Khaled Aljenfawi

Verbally or physically abusing some domestic servants, stone pelting some expatriate passengers and drivers, lack of patience toward some expatriate doctors and teachers, by some individuals, certainly indicate that tolerance usually begins at home.

Already known for its tolerance toward strangers, foreigners and non-citizens, our Kuwaiti traditional society stands upon certain pillars of morality. These moral ideals usually advocate mercy, compassion and understanding toward others. As such, as Kuwaiti citizens, many of us already understand the importance of such moral ideals and many of us live by them. Therefore, we realize that we are integral parts of a larger human family; many of us in fact continue to refuse anti-social behavior directed toward some expatriates.

This being said yet certain individuals in our society continue to verbally or physically torment some helpless domestic servants. Some youngsters pelt expatriate passengers while they ride in public buses; perhaps just because they believe they can do so!

One can add to this the other negative phenomenon common these days of not being patient with some expatriate doctors and teachers and simply opting for the more reckless behavior: verbally and sometimes physically assaulting these expatriate professionals. Such behavior go against our national law and against the teachings of our national heritage. Such negative behavior in fact go against our Islamic tenets!

As a case in point, borrowing from already accepted international laws about human rights, and relying basically on our genuine Kuwaiti heritage of tolerance, officials in the Ministry of Education continue to update our national curriculum to adapt to a changing world. For example, primary, middle and secondary schooling emphasizes tolerance as a way of life in a modern society. Yet what the younger generations are learning at school about tolerance continues to be threatened by the behavior of some.

Intolerance actually goes against the basic teachings of our Islamic faith. As a Muslim society, Kuwait has been welcoming strangers, foreigners and expatriates for tens of years without apparent conflict. This tolerance toward those who are different springs from our Islamic faith, in addition, it originates from our national heritage. For example, one of the most enduring tenets of Islam is the equality among humans: in the Holy Quran, the Almighty say: “We have created you from male and female, and have made you nations and tribes that ye may know one another. Lo! the noblest of you, in the sight of Allah, is the best in conduct. Lo! Allah is Knower, Aware.” (Al-Hujraat-13).

One cannot instill by force tolerance in the mind of a child unless the whole family believes in the legitimacy of tolerance and its importance to its general wellbeing. If a young child learns about tolerance at school and then encounters daily situations of intolerance at home, he/she will find it hard to believe in tolerance. In other words, tolerance in addition to being a moral concept, which reflects the morality of a whole society, will take its roots if the ordinary family considers it as an accepted code of conduct. A Tolerant young person for example, will subsequently be a tolerant father or mother for these parents are already used to tolerance and will ultimately help shape the mentalities of their children.

A child who is already used to voicing his points freely in a safe family environment will find it much easier to accommodate tolerance and accept it as a way of life. Indeed, a child raised in a Tolerant family will eventually become a good neighbor, a good friend and certainly a Tolerant person toward those who are different from him.

khaledaljenfawi@yahoo.com

Wooo Hooo on you, Khaled Aljenfawi!

February 17, 2009 Posted by | Character, Cultural, Family Issues, Interconnected, Kuwait, Leadership, Living Conditions, Social Issues, Spiritual | 6 Comments

Islamic Solution to Kuwait Unemployment: Women Stay Home

From today’s Kuwait Times:

Islamic system way to resolve unemployment

KUWAIT; Dr. Ahmad Aziz al Muzaini, the Secretary of the Shura and Salam group, said that following Islamic doctrine concerning work would be one solution to the problem of unemployment and the excessive numbers of expatriate workers.

Calling on women to take care of their own homes and families, rather than employing domestic staff, Dr. Al Muzaini said that by doing so millions of Kuwaiti Dinars transferred outside the country annually would be saved and invested in the local economy. If domestic workers proved to be essential, he said, local and other Arab people could do these jobs, rather than bringing in expatriates from thousands of miles away.

Dr. Al-Muzaini said that his group has also recommended a temporary suspension of the import of cars to Kuwait, saying that each household in the country currently owns several cars which is causing numerous accidents and traffic congestion.

He also recommended that more women be employed as taxi drivers catering to all-female clientele, which would be in female passengers interests and insure their safety.

There’s more. You can read it yourself in the Kuwait Times.

(Sigh) Where to start?

Did you know there is a law on the books in Kuwait that to have a driver’s license, a woman must have a college degree and/or be employed full time? When I asked our sponsor/fixer, he told me that “of course, madam, that doesn’t apply to you.”

But if Dr. Ahmad Aziz al Muzaini wants us to stay home, do you think he also prefers that the men hold responsible jobs rather than women? How do you think he feels about female Ministers? Does he think women should be restricted from driving as a solution to traffic congestion?

I have female Muslim friends who say that there is nothing un-Islamic about women going out to work, that on the contrary, women were encouraged to have their own businesses and were encouraged to seek education and knowledge in true Islam.

Why is it when things start going south, the ultra-religious start throwing restrictions on women?

February 12, 2009 Posted by | Cultural, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Generational, Kuwait, Living Conditions, Rants, Spiritual, Women's Issues | 20 Comments

Transition Sunrise

I was shocked when I looked at the five day forecast and saw that the high temperature for tomorrow is 80°F / 27°C. Holy smokes. Winter is over. 80° is about as hot as I can handle without A/C – around 80° in Florida, fleas eggs start hatching, and it is time to flea-proof the house. We don’t have the same problem with fleas here, probably due to the air conditioning, on most months of the year.

This morning’s sunrise is barely less murky than yesterday’s. The weather reporter says “light haze” but sometimes it says that in the middle of a heavy dust storm, so I don’t put a lot of credibility in what it says.
00sunrise9feb09

The days are getting perceptibly longer. In our neighborhood, when the meuzzin “chants” for the dawn prayers, it is not so hard to get up. We are blessed to have a tenor muezzin, who loves the morning call to prayer, and does it with great melodiousness and passion. It is a wonderful way to wake up.

Have a great day, Kuwait.

February 9, 2009 Posted by | Arts & Handicrafts, Beauty, ExPat Life, Health Issues, Kuwait, Living Conditions, Spiritual, sunrise series, Weather | 7 Comments

Prayers for Deliverance from Enemies

In today’s Lectionary, a timely prayer for deliverance from those wicked people who gleefully plan for the downfall of others:

Psalm 70

Prayer for Deliverance from Enemies

To the leader. Of David, for the memorial offering.

1 Be pleased, O God, to deliver me.
O Lord, make haste to help me!
2 Let those be put to shame and confusion
who seek my life.
Let those be turned back and brought to dishonour
who desire to hurt me.
3 Let those who say, ‘Aha, Aha!’
turn back because of their shame.
4 Let all who seek you
rejoice and be glad in you.
Let those who love your salvation
say evermore, ‘God is great!’
5 But I am poor and needy;
hasten to me, O God!
You are my help and my deliverer;
O Lord, do not delay!

Psalm 71

1 In you, O Lord, I take refuge;
let me never be put to shame.
2 In your righteousness deliver me and rescue me;
incline your ear to me and save me.
3 Be to me a rock of refuge,
a strong fortress,* to save me,
for you are my rock and my fortress.

4 Rescue me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked,
from the grasp of the unjust and cruel.
5 For you, O Lord, are my hope,
my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
6 Upon you I have leaned from my birth;
it was you who took me from my mother’s womb.
My praise is continually of you.

7 I have been like a portent to many,
but you are my strong refuge.
8 My mouth is filled with your praise,
and with your glory all day long.
9 Do not cast me off in the time of old age;
do not forsake me when my strength is spent.
10 For my enemies speak concerning me,
and those who watch for my life consult together.
11 They say, ‘Pursue and seize that person
whom God has forsaken,
for there is no one to deliver.’
12 O God, do not be far from me;
O my God, make haste to help me!
13 Let my accusers be put to shame and consumed;
let those who seek to hurt me
be covered with scorn and disgrace.
14 But I will hope continually,
and will praise you yet more and more.
15 My mouth will tell of your righteous acts,
of your deeds of salvation all day long,
though their number is past my knowledge.
16 I will come praising the mighty deeds of the Lord God,
I will praise your righteousness, yours alone.
17 O God, from my youth you have taught me,
and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds.
18 So even to old age and grey hairs,
O God, do not forsake me,
until I proclaim your might
to all the generations to come.*
Your power
19 and your righteousness, O God,
reach the high heavens.

You who have done great things,
O God, who is like you?
20 You who have made me see many troubles and calamities
will revive me again;
from the depths of the earth
you will bring me up again.
21 You will increase my honour,
and comfort me once again.

22 I will also praise you with the harp
for your faithfulness, O my God;
I will sing praises to you with the lyre,
O Holy One of Israel.
23 My lips will shout for joy
when I sing praises to you;
my soul also, which you have rescued.
24 All day long my tongue will talk of your righteous help,
for those who tried to do me harm
have been put to shame, and disgraced.

Nothing new under the sun. These are verses we share, Christian, Jew and Moslem alike. Interesting, huh?

February 5, 2009 Posted by | Character, Community, Leadership, Social Issues, Spiritual | 10 Comments