Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

She Cried

“I wanted to thank you,” I said to my son’s sixth grade teacher “I can’t imagine how hard it was to get 30 sixth graders to go through the paper-writing process, but I know my son learned from it and he will use the skills you taught him for many years to come. One day he will thank you in his heart, but I wanted to thank you now.”

It was one of those small expat military communities, where your child’s teacher also goes to the same church you go to and shops in the same commissary. We were at a church benefit, chatting before dinner.

She started crying.

She told me that every year, she teaches the sixth graders to write papers, and they hate it. She started with library research, making bibliography cards on little index cards, formal writing, footnotes and a formal bibliography at the end with a formal title page at the beginning.

I was the first one who had ever thanked her. She believed in what she was doing, but it was so hard, and she never got any positive feedback.

Imagine. Do you remember what sixth graders are like? This lady had courage, and persistence. She gave these students (in spite of themselves) a skill which would take them through the rest of high school and into college. They learned to do it right, so they never had to embarrass themselves by turning in an inferior, poorly-done paper. It was a great gift she gave these students – and no one thanked her.

Well, it would be a rare, very rare sixth grader who has the maturity to understand that while it was a difficult and demanding section in their school year, it was a tool in their tool box of life, a gift that just kept on giving.

Thank you. Thank you, all the teachers out there who knock themselves out to give our children (and grandchildren) the tools they need to be good students and good citizens.

July 5, 2012 Posted by | Arts & Handicrafts, Biography, Bureaucracy, Character, Community, Cultural, Education, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Germany, Interconnected, Leadership, Living Conditions, Parenting, Relationships, Values, Work Related Issues | 2 Comments

Rules for Thank You Notes

My son’s sweet wife challenged me to do a blog entry on Thank You notes, so I think I will do it today, when everyone is out playing in the sun, BBQ’ing with family and friends, and not indoors reading blogs. 🙂

Thank you notes are a specialty of mine. Mom taught us the necessity of thank you notes when we were little; I think I remember we couldn’t play with something at Christmas or Birthday until we had written our thank you notes. We didn’t like it, but we got used to it.

As I grew older, I realized how much I liked getting thank you notes. I noticed that I liked them best when they were personal. When I worked for charitable organizations, I discovered that writing a good thank you note could 1) make a person happy they had given a good donation 2) increase the probability that they would donate again and 3) increase the likelihood that they would increase the size of their donation, as well as continuing to donate. All those are good things when you are raising money for a good cause.

I also discovered that I was likelier to be considered for a highly-sought-after position by writing a good thank you note. Every edge counts in a competitive job market. Thank you notes give you a big edge – out of 100 applicants, very few will take the time to write that note.

Many believe that hand-written notes have gone the way of the dodo, but they still exist, and they still are welcome.

I noticed that both of my parents became less likely to use their computers as they aged; one day computers will have greater voice recognition capabilities, but until then, the keyboards are difficult for older fingers, and the screens are difficult for aging eyes. The elderly love a hand written note, something they can hold in their hand, something they can pull out and read again and again, something they can share with a visitor.

So: Rules for thank you notes

1. A late thank you note is better than no thank you note. It doesn’t matter how late.

2. An earlier thank you note is better than a later thank you note.

3. You can write thank you notes more than once for the same item. For example, if ten years later, you pull out that Waterford bowl you got for your wedding, and have used for special occasions ever since, you can take a minute to write a note telling the giver how much your enjoyment of that bowl has been over the years, and he or she will be delighted to hear it again!

4. A handwritten note is better than an e-mail thanks, and an e-mail thanks is better than no thanks at all. Many people do e-mail thanks these days, like “thanks for dinner last night, we had a great time” etc. If you are REALLY thankful, hand write that note.

Here is a template for a sweet but short Thank You note:

Dear (name),

(Thank you so much) for the (wonderful) (fascinating) (beautiful)(lovely) (ITEM). We are (blown away) (delighted) (honored) (so grateful) (amazed) that you would think of us at this time.

(One personal line like:

“John says he can imagine us using this (X) for years to come!”
“We can see the sweet thoughtfulness you put into choosing something so right for us.”
“So-and-So says she is wearing it to school tomorrow!”
“You must have spent hours making that! We are amazed at the time and effort you must have put into it/them”)

Again, many thanks for thinking of us and sending such a nice gift.

No-No’s

(Under NO circumstances can you say:

“Why on earth did you think we would like that??”
“That doesn’t look like me at all!”
“It’s horrible! Unspeakably horrible!”

And then you sign. It helps to have little sets of notecards, not too large, so you don’t feel like you have to fill the whole thing. If you have kids, have them draw or paint a picture to enclose. Or send a photo. Put a stamp on and post it. Yes, the old fashioned way. If you don’t have the address, get it. Sometimes you can even find addresses online. You know, Google it. 🙂

So I challenge YOU. Try it. When you receive a gift, write a quick thank you and mail it off. If you think about someone with gratitude, write them a short note to tell them. You can even e-mail a thankful thought, it’s better than not sending anything, even if it is not a handwritten note.

July 4, 2012 Posted by | Aging, Arts & Handicrafts, Character, Civility, Cultural, Experiment, Marketing, Tools, Values, Work Related Issues | 2 Comments

The Customer from Hell at Target

Me. Today I was the customer from hell at Target.

I like Target. I like it that you can find just about anything you need there. I usually look for a deal, or a good price on things, but when I just need something, I just go buy it at Target. I also like their ad campaign, it’s a little camp but very colorful and always has cool products featured.

So today I went in for hair color stuff. I found it, but then I also found a display containing packages of two together, and it costs a lot less. It says Buy Two for Less!

Yes! Yes! I am buying two! I always buy at least two so I don’t have to go shopping that often; holdover from my days of buying six months worth when I was living in Kuwait and Qatar. It doesn’t go bad, and you have it when you need it.

None of the cellophaned two-packs have the color I need, so I take the ones I need and the two pack to the cashier, and I explain I want the special “Buy Two and Save” price, and she says “Whoa! That’s beyond me!” and sends me to the customer service counter.

At the customer service counter they explain to me that this is a special deal to encourage customers to buy more than one; they buy two and get a special deal. I agree with them, and isn’t this great, I want to buy two! Well no, they explain, Target pays a different price for the package than for the singles, so they can’t sell the singles two for the same price as the two bundled together.

Wait. These are the exact same product. EXACT. Except that these two wrapped in cellophane are 2 for $11.99, and the two exact same product I want to buy are priced at $7.99 EACH. So I am supposed to pay $5 MORE to buy two single ones? Something is not right with this picture. I ask to see a supervisor.

I am quiet and mannerly. I have a secret weapon – it is called pleasant persistence. They keep explaining to me that I can’t buy what I want at the special price and I just smile at them and politely explain how it doesn’t make sense. They are telling me in their explanations to “PLEASE GO AWAY!” and I am smiling and politely telling them in my own way that I am not going anywhere, and I want my product at the two-for price.

Finally, the supervisor says to sell it to me at the two-for price. As she is ringing it up, the customer service rep says “this happens all the time, not with hair products but with all kinds of products when we have the bundle price and the single price.” I suggest she mentions it to management, and that it costs a lot in time and in customer frustration and customer service frustration, and she says “it wouldn’t help.”

I still like Target. I imagine there are a lot of customers who give up and walk away. Not me. It doesn’t make sense to me to pay $5 more for something that they WANT you to buy two of . . .

June 25, 2012 Posted by | Cultural, Customer Service, Financial Issues, Living Conditions, Marketing, Pensacola, Shopping, Values, Work Related Issues | , | Leave a comment

“Never for Acclaim, Always for Country”

This weekend the CIA also honors fallen warriors, and in a new level of transparency, shares some of those names. It’s devastating to lose a loved one in the military, and I cannot imagine what it was like to lose a loved one and not to even be able to tell people your loved one was lost in service to his or her country. Heartfelt thanks to all those who have served silently and anonymously and sacrificed identity and history for our nation. You know who you are. 🙂

From ABC News:

Out of the shadows in death: The CIA honors its fallen

By Suzanne Kelly CNN – When you’re a spy, you have to accept the fact that everything you do will go unnoticed by most people during your life. Sometimes that secrecy even follows you in death, with a simple star carved into a marble wall at Langley being the only memorial to your service.

Sometimes though, in death, the names come out, along with just enough information to piece together a glimpse of what life — and death — have been like for CIA spies over the past three decades.

This past Monday, 15 names were added to what’s known by insiders as the “Book of Honor.” When a name is inscribed in the book, it allows family and friends of the fallen to publicly acknowledge in general terms, how their loved ones spent their lives, and how they died.

The names and brief stories shared with a crowd said to number in the hundreds gathered in the CIA lobby, told a story of an Agency spread far and wide; the story of an Agency not only consumed with tracking down terrorists, but sometimes becoming victims of the hunted.

Jeffrey R. Patneau, described by CIA Director David Petraeus as a “young can-do officer,” was killed in Yemen in September 2008. Yemen has become a hotbed of al Qaeda activity and is where a recent al Qaeda in the Arabian Pensinsula (AQAP) plot to bring down an airliner with a difficult-to-detect new explosive material, was recently foiled by undercover operatives.

Five of those honored this year died on April 18, 1983, when terrorists targeted the U.S. Embassy in Beirut, killing 63 people. Phyliss Nancy Faraci had also been one of the last four Americans evacuated from the Mekong Delta when Saigon fell, according to an Agency spokesman. She died in Beirut along with Deborah M. Hixson, Frank J. Johnston, and a married couple, James F. and Monique N. Lewis. Petraeus noted the Embassy bombing as the place where the Agency “first caught sight of the adversary we face today.”

To get a sense of just how widespread the CIA presence has been over the years, Matthew K. Gannon was killed in the December 1988 bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 over Lockerbie, Scotland; Molly N. Hardy was killed in the 1998 suicide bombing of the U.S. Embassy in Nairobi; Leslianne Shedd died when hijackers downed the plane she was on over the Indian Ocean in November 1996; Jacqueline K. Van Landingham was killed in Pakistan in March 1995; Barry S. Castiglione died during the ocean rescue of a colleague in 1992 in the waters off El Salvador; Lawrence N. Freedman was killed in Somalia in December 1992; Thomas M. Jennings, Jr. died in Bosnia in 1997; Freddie R. Woodruff was killed in Georgia in 1993; and Robert W. Woods died in a plane crash during a humanitarian mission to Ethiopia in 1989.

Petraeus told the group of gathered mourners and friends that the officers who have died for the mission “all heard the same call to duty and answered it without hesitation — never for acclaim, always for country.”

One more star has been carved into that wall so far this year, bringing the number of stars representing fallen officers to 103. We don’t know who the latest person was, or how they died, but maybe someday, we will.

Copyright 2012 Scripps Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Read more: http://www.abc2news.com/dpp/news/national/out-of-the-shadows-in-death-the-cia-honors-its-fallen#ixzz1w5kbjH5x

May 27, 2012 Posted by | Adventure, Bureaucracy, Character, Circle of Life and Death, Counter-terrorism, Cultural, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Interconnected, Living Conditions, Values, Work Related Issues | 2 Comments

A New Heart I Will Give You!

From today’s reading in The Lectionary:

You’d think that people who work for non-profits would be particularly good people, particularly, well . . charitable. You’d think that, but my experience – I have a lot of experience working in non-profits – is that working in charitable organizations can have the effect of hardening your heart. You have so many people coming to you lying, you meet so many cons. When I work with the homeless, or the hungry, I have to pray daily for a clean heart, a new heart, a soft heart, a heart that will not harden. I have to pray to face each new client with a will to listen to their story and to believe.

I love this verse from Ezekiel, and I always envision that heart to be strengthened and armored by the Lord, so that a tender heart can continue to live within.

Ezekiel 36:22-27

22 Therefore say to the house of Israel, Thus says the Lord God: It is not for your sake, O house of Israel, that I am about to act, but for the sake of my holy name, which you have profaned among the nations to which you came. 23I will sanctify my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, and which you have profaned among them; and the nations shall know that I am the Lord, says the Lord God, when through you I display my holiness before their eyes. 24I will take you from the nations, and gather you from all the countries, and bring you into your own land. 25I will sprinkle clean water upon you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you. 26A new heart I will give you, and a new spirit I will put within you; and I will remove from your body the heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. 27I will put my spirit within you, and make you follow my statutes and be careful to observe my ordinances.

May 26, 2012 Posted by | Character, Charity, Community, Lectionary Readings, Spiritual, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment

For My Kuwaiti Friends With Teenagers :-)

If you have a Teen-Ager interested in art, history and tour guiding then this Program is for YOU!

This is a new programme the Dar al-Athar al-Islamiyyah is offering for students and I think it’s pretty exciting.

Thanks,
Sue Day

We are excited to announce the launch of the new
DAI Junior Docent Programme
for students between ages 13 – 16

Information Meeting
11 April at 7 PM
The Warsha
Amricani Cultural Centre
or
email: susanday@darmuseum.org.kw
The two year programme (September 2012 – June 2014) is designed to help your child develop personal abilities, including:

· leadership skills
· team work
· problem solving
· public speaking
· time management
· study skills
· perseverance
· creative thinking

This will be accomplished while they complete, with help from DAI professionals:

· 15 hours of docent training
· 18 hours of art history education
· 66 hours of docent work
· 12 hours of introduction to six aspects of museum management
· 12 hours training in one of the following: acquisitions, collection management, conservation, museum management, exhibition presentation, or museum education
· 12 hours training in another of the following: acquisitions, collection management, conservation, museum management, exhibition presentation, or museum education
· the preparation, implementation and management of an exhibition

So whether your child is into arts and culture, science, or just interested in something fun that looks good on a university application, you should consider encouraging him or her to join the DAI Junior Docent Programme.


Susan Eileen Day
Communications and Education
Dar al-Athar al-Islamiyyah

March 28, 2012 Posted by | Adventure, Arts & Handicrafts, Cross Cultural, Cultural, ExPat Life, Kuwait, Living Conditions, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment

AdventureMan Gets a Great Idea

“Hey! I’ve got a great idea!”

AdventureMan scared the hell out of me; I was coming out of the bathroom, it is the middle of the night, and I intend to go right back to sleep, but what the H___? It’s four in the morning and AM wants to tell me his great idea?

AdventureMan has been sick, really really sick, two antibiotics, a steroid, ear drops, a and a probiotic sick. For a week, mostly he slept and groaned with pain, either it was the worst cold in the world or the flu, coupled with a terrible ear infection. Now that the antibiotics have done their job, the combination of all the meds leaves him wide awake much of the night.

I wake up almost every morning feeling great; I am a morning person. We have a family rule; I don’t discuss any financial matters after nine at night. So while AdventureMan’s mind is racing, and good ideas are tumbling around, it is my down time and I am not prepared to discuss anything. Technically, it is still after nine o’clock. although an argument could be made that it is the next morning . . . but it is too early in the morning, and AdventureMan lets me go back to sleep.

Actually, when I woke up the next morning (and AdventureMan slept another couple hours) and I thought about it, it really was one of those great ideas that sometimes comes out of the blue in the middle of the night.

Now that we are no longer getting the expat exemption on our taxes, we were gritting our teeth about what we might yet owe in taxes, but our brilliant new tax preparer found something we would never have thought of in a million years, and . . . we will get money back. God is good. 🙂 It’s a miracle.

March 6, 2012 Posted by | Aging, Communication, ExPat Life, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Health Issues, Living Conditions, Relationships, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment

A Problem with Tension and a Problem with Timing

You probably think I am talking about my personal life when I talk about problems with tension and problems with timing. You might think so, but you would be wrong. I am talking about my sewing machine.

I have an old Pfaff, a real workhorse. I bought it when I started having a problem with tension and timing with my older Pfaff, and didn’t know where to take it in Kuwait to have it serviced. (I found a place to get it serviced, but then that place disappeared!) Now, when I am trying to finish up two quilts for the upcoming quilt show, is not a good time for it to act up, but I am also not surprised. Doesn’t the worst thing always happen at the worst possible time?

I have an even older sewing machine, a Singer Featherweight, that I can use while trying to figure out where to take my Pfaff in Pensacola for a service. The Featherweight is electric, one of the earliest portable sewing machines made, and when I would take it to be serviced in Qatar and Kuwait, the eyes at the shops would just gleam.

“They really knew what they were doing when they made this machine,” they would tell me. “You don’t see machines made like this anymore.”

The Singer Featherweight has no bells and whistles. It sews forward and in reverse. It will do free motions quilting because I have a special attachment for it. It has saved the day many a time before, and tomorrow, when the light is good, I will haul it out once again and set it up to get me through this crisis.

February 24, 2012 Posted by | Arts & Handicrafts, Cross Cultural, Cultural, Customer Service, ExPat Life, Kuwait, Living Conditions, Pensacola, Qatar, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment

Three Lies About the American Economy

Here is what makes me sad. Even though this information is available to everyone, these three misconceptions will continue to be put forth as “truth.” People believe what they want to believe, and they don’t do the research. I found this on the AOL Daily Finance page.


By Morgan Housel

At a conference in Philadelphia last October, a Wharton professor noted that one of the country’s biggest economic problems is a tsunami of misinformation. You can’t have a rational debate when facts are so easily supplanted by overreaching statements, broad generalizations, and misconceptions. And if you can’t have a rational debate, how does anything important get done? As author William Feather once advised, “Beware of the person who can’t be bothered by details.” There seems to be no shortage of those people lately.

Here are three misconceptions that need to be put to rest.

Misconception No. 1: Most of what Americans spend their money on is made in China.

Fact: Just 2.7% of personal consumption expenditures go to Chinese-made goods and services. 88.5% of U.S. consumer spending is on American-made goods and services.

I used that statistic in a recent article, and the response from readers was overwhelming: Hogwash. People just didn’t believe it.
The figure comes from a Federal Reserve report. You can read it here.

A common rebuttal I got was, “How can it only be 2.7% when almost everything in Walmart (WMT) is made in China?” Because Walmart’s $260 billion in U.S. revenue isn’t exactly reflective of America’s $14.5 trillion economy. Walmart might sell a broad range of knickknacks, many of which are made in China, but the vast majority of what Americans spend their money on is not knickknacks.

The Bureau of Labor Statistics closely tracks how an average American spends their money in an annual report called the Consumer Expenditure Survey. In 2010, the average American spent 34% of their income on housing, 13% on food, 11% on insurance and pensions, 7% on health care, and 2% on education. Those categories alone make up nearly 70% of total spending, and are comprised almost entirely of American-made goods and services (only 7% of food is imported, according to the USDA).

Even when looking at physical goods alone, Chinese imports still account for just a small fraction of U.S. spending. Just 6.4% of nondurable goods — things like food, clothing and toys — purchased in the U.S. are made in China; 76.2% are made in America. For durable goods — things like cars and furniture — 12% are made in China; 66.6% are made in America.

Another way to grasp the value of Chinese-made goods is to look at imports. The U.S. imported $399 billion worth of goods from China last year, which is 2.7% of our $14.5 trillion economy. Is that a lot? Yes. Is it most of what we spend our money on? Not by a long shot.

Part of the misconception is likely driven by the notion that America’s manufacturing base has been in steep decline. The truth, surprising to many, is that real manufacturing output today is near an all-time high. What’s dropped precipitously in recent decades is manufacturing employment. Technology and automation has allowed American manufacturers to build more stuff with far fewer workers than in the past. One good example: In 1950, a U.S. Steel (X) plant in Gary, Ind., produced 6 million tons of steel with 30,000 workers. Today, it produces 7.5 million tons with 5,000 workers. Output has gone up; employment has dropped like a rock.

Misconception No. 2: We owe most of our debt to China.

Fact: China owns 7.6% of U.S. government debt outstanding.

As of November, China owned $1.13 trillion of Treasuries. Government debt stood at $14.9 trillion that month. That’s 7.6%.
Who owns the rest? The largest holder of U.S. debt is the federal government itself. Various government trust funds like the Social Security trust fund own about $4.4 trillion worth of Treasury securities. The Federal Reserve owns another $1.6 trillion.

Both are unique owners: Interest paid on debt held by federal trust funds is used to cover a portion of federal spending, and the vast majority of interest earned by the Federal Reserve is remitted back to the U.S. Treasury.
The rest of our debt is owned by state and local governments ($700 billion), private domestic investors ($3.1 trillion), and other non-Chinese foreign investors ($3.5 trillion).

Does China own a lot of our debt? Yes, but it’s a qualified yes. Of all Treasury debt held by foreigners, China is indeed the largest owner ($1.13 trillion), followed by Japan ($1 trillion) and the U.K. ($429 billion).

Right there, you can see that Japan and the U.K. combined own more U.S. debt than China. Now, how many times have you heard someone say that we borrow an inordinate amount of money from Japan and the U.K.? I never have. But how often do you hear some version of the “China is our banker” line? Too often, I’d say.

Misconception No. 3: We get most of our oil from the Middle East.

Fact: Just 9.8% of oil consumed in the U.S. comes from the Middle East.

According the U.S. Energy Information Administration, the U.S. consumes 19.2 million barrels of petroleum products per day. Of that amount, a net 49% is produced domestically. The rest is imported.

Where is it imported from? Only a small fraction comes from the Middle East, and that fraction has been declining in recent years. Last year, imports from the Persian Gulf region — which includes Bahrain, Iran, Iraq, Kuwait, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, and the United Arab Emirates — made up 9.8% of total petroleum supplied to the U.S. In 2001, that number was 14.1%.

The U.S. imports more than twice as much petroleum from Canada and Mexico than it does from the Middle East. Add in the share produced domestically, and the majority of petroleum consumed in the U.S. comes from North America.

This isn’t to belittle our energy situation. The nation still relies on imports for about half of its oil. That’s bad. But should the Middle East get the attention it does when we talk about oil reliance? In terms of security and geopolitical stability, perhaps. In terms of volume, probably not.
A Roomful of Skeptics

“People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe,” said Andy Rooney. Do these numbers fit with what you already believed? No hard feelings if they don’t. Just let me know why in the comment section below.

Motley Fool contributor Morgan Housel owns shares of Wal-Mart. Follow him on Twitter @TMFHousel. The Motley Fool owns shares of Wal-Mart Stores. Motley Fool newsletter services have recommended buying shares of and creating a diagonal call position in Wal-Mart.

See full article from DailyFinance: http://www.dailyfinance.com/2012/02/13/3-economic-misconceptions-that-need-to-die/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl6%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D135454&icid=sphere_copyright

February 14, 2012 Posted by | Cultural, Financial Issues, Lies, Living Conditions, Political Issues, Social Issues, Statistics, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment

Boat 1, Bridge 0

This is both very sad, and funny. What made this guy think he could make it under the bridge? Two spans of the bridge are draped over the bow:

You can read about it here.

January 27, 2012 Posted by | Humor, Living Conditions, Work Related Issues | Leave a comment