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Elderly Women Prime Targets for Cons

Found this fascinating article this morning on AOL News/finance There was a time when I worked with transitional homeless people, helping them to find ways to re-enter the mainstream. A percentage of them didn’t want to enter the mainstream, they didn’t like rules, and they were looking for an easier way. One of the paths was by being part of the elder-worker force. I would watch them take a job and then work their way into a position of dominance in an elderly person’s life. Partly, the elderly were lonely, and thrived on the new attention, and interpreted it as caring.

Then would come the sob stories. School starting and not enough money to buy shoes and books for the children. A broken-down car, and funds needed to get it fixed so she can get to her job. Once it starts, it never ends.

The key to prevention is staying engaged with friends, neighbors and family who are paying attention, and can give perspective to this new relationship. The one question I asked is “if there were not money involved, would this relationship exist?”

Elder Abuse: How to Protect Grandma From Con Men and Thieves
By Sheryl Nance-Nash Posted 9:00AM 06/03/11 Retirement, People, MetLife

See full article from DailyFinance: http://srph.it/lXHooJ


Who would pick the pocket of your grandma or grandpa? Apparently, any number of people. Older Americans are losing $2.9 billion annually to elder financial abuse, a 12% increase from the $2.6 billion estimated in 2008, according to The MetLife Study of Elder Financial Abuse: Crimes of Occasion, Desperation, and Predation Against America’s Elders, released Wednesday.

According to the study, 51% of these abusers are strangers, but 34% of the perpetrators were family, friends and neighbors. As for “trusted advisers,” exploitation from the business sector accounted for 12% of reported cases. Medicare and Medicaid fraud accounts for 4% of reported cases. As a subset, the percentage of robberies and crimes classified as “scams perpetrated by strangers” increased from 9% to 28% from 2008 to 2010.

Who’s on the top of the target list? Women. The study, produced by the MetLife (MET) Mature Market Institute in collaboration with the National Committee for the Prevention of Elder Abuse and the Center for Gerontology at Virginia Polytechnic Institute, shows women were nearly twice as likely to be victims of elder financial abuse as men.

Also prime for the picking were people between the ages of 80 and 89 who lived alone and required some help with either health care or home maintenance. Primarily, men were the menace: Nearly 60% of perpetrators were males, mostly between ages 30 and 59.

Predators lie in wait, watching: In the most common scenarios, strangers targeted victims who were out shopping, driving or managing the financial affairs, and often looked for particular flags of vulnerability like handicapped tags on cars, canes or displays of confusion. Crimes included cons, purse snatchings and associated physical assaults.

But that even those closest to an elderly person can give in to temptation or desperation. In cases involving a person known to the victim, trusted helpers like caretakers, handymen, friends, “sweethearts,” children, lawyers and others seized upon opportunities to forge checks, steal credit cards, pilfer bank accounts, transfer assets and generally decimate elders’ finances, the study revealed. The holidays apparently bring out the worst in people: At that time of year, overall dollar losses due to family and friends were higher than any other category.

Married to the Con Job

People can get quite creative with abuse. One unusual method — caregivers secretly marrying their elderly charges, says Susan Slater-Jansen, an attorney at Kurzman Eisenberg Corbin & Lever.

There have been numerous lawsuits over cases in which a caregiver married a mentally incapacitated older patient and the patient’s family didn’t learn about it until after the patient had died. Once a person is dead, it’s too late — in all but three states, you can’t void a marriage if one spouse has died, says Slater-Jansen. To help lower the odds of such a thing happening to your parent, adult children should make sure they receive duplicate monthly statements from all bank and brokerage accounts; install nanny cams; carefully and thoroughly check references for all caregivers; visit parents often, both while the caregiver is there and when they are not; and discuss with your parents the treatment they are receiving from caregivers.

If you discover such a fraudulent marriage has taken place, act quickly to get it annulled.

After the parent dies, heirs can sue to recover money from the “spouse.” More and more, courts have found ways to deny spouses if the marriage was fraudulent, says Slater-Jansen.

“The most flagrant abuse is perpetrated on the elder by the hired caregiver, neighbor, or ‘new’ friend,” warns Karen Maarse Fitzgerald, a principal in her own elder law practice. “A simple power of attorney signed by the elder can give to the “agent” broad and sweeping powers over the elder’s life savings. I have seen bank accounts drained within days, the money and perpetrator vanishing to another country.”

Protection Yourself and Your Relatives

The worst forms of elder abuse go beyond money: There can be physical abuse and sexual violence as well. “The vigilance of friends and family can help protect elders from those who are predatory, which may, unfortunately, include strangers or even other loved ones,” said Sandra Timmermann, Ed.D., director of the MetLife Mature Market Institute, in a prepared statement.

What can the elderly do to protect themselves? Among the guidance offered by the report’s authors:

“Stay active and engage with others; socialize with your family members and friends. Avoid isolation, as it can lead to loneliness, depression, and make you more vulnerable to financial abuse or exploitation.”

“Use direct deposit for Social Security and other payments to prevent mail theft. Sign your own checks whenever possible.”

“Stay organized and keep important papers and legal documents in a safe, secure location.”

“Review your legal documents (i.e., wills, trusts, and power of attorney), as well as other important documents (i.e., insurance policies) at least annually, to make certain they continue to represent your wishes.”

Ted Sarenski, who chairs the American Institute of Certified Public Accountants’ Elder Planning Task Force, would add to that list. His tips:

Subscribe to national and state Do Not Call lists;

Keep Social Security cards in a safe place;

Remove mail promptly from the mailbox;

Shred all confidential and financial information prior to discarding.

“Consider allowing the bank to send a duplicate copy of your bank statement to a trusted family member,” advises attorney Andrew Stoltmann, who has a large client base of seniors. “Usually, most financial elder exploitation cases are only reported or discovered six to 12 months after the initial losses have occurred.”

Elders whose sight is failing are at even greater risk because they may rely upon the very person who is stealing from them to ensure that their financial transactions are in order, says Stoltmann. “An independent pair of eyes that is able to review bank statements every 30 days will be able to catch suspicious activities in the early stages and cut it off. This is crucial.”

Advance Planning Can Help Dodge Dangers

When you are the responsible caregiver, know too, that your prudence can go a long way in preventing financial abuse.

Have some tough conversations. You need to know whether there is a will or a durable power of attorney, and where such documents are. Does your parent have a living will? If so, does it give you clarity about what your loved one’s wishes are? A health care power of attorney would permit a trusted individual make medical decisions if your elderly relative was unable to.

It’s important not to wait until the eleventh hour to have these talks. Ideally, those documents should be drawn up when your relative is of sound mind and body. It’s not a bad idea either, to have a trusted adviser, not only know where the documents are kept, but be able to get to them if needed.

Beware of the appearance on the scene of the “trusted new friend.” If mom and dad have a neighbor, caregiver or other outsider who is suddenly their best pal, running errands, going to the bank, and generally being around all the time when they never were before, it can be a warning sign that someone is taking advantage, warns Sarenski.

“Elder financial abuse invariably results in losses of human rights and dignity,” said Karen A. Roberto, Ph.D., director of the Center for Gerontology, at Virginia Polytechnic Institute. ” Despite growing public awareness from a parade of high-profile financial abuse victims, it remains under reported, under-recognized, and under-prosecuted. The 2010 Passage of the Elder Justice Act may bring more attention and resources to this crime leading to prevention among the expanding older population.”

The bottom line, says Maarse Fitzgerald: “Protect elders from isolation, which allows the perpetrators to take control of our elder’s lives.”

See full article from DailyFinance: http://srph.it/lXHooJ

June 5, 2011 Posted by | Aging, Community, Crime, Customer Service, Family Issues, Financial Issues, Health Issues, Mating Behavior, Relationships, Scams, Social Issues | 2 Comments

Walking in Saxonburg, Pennsylvania

You know we love to walk, and Saxonburg has a great Main Street, perfect for walking. I don’t know what other seasons are like here, but oh! The flowers of spring! I was in heaven:


I loved the cobbled sidewalks, and the churches, and the houses:


Even better with a dog 🙂

June 5, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Beauty, Road Trips, Travel | , , | Leave a comment

Restaurant Hotel Saxonburg, Saxonburg, Pennsylvania

How lucky can you get? Just next door to the Mainstay in Saxonburg is the Hote Saxonburg, which has a restaurant, and that restaurant has a menu full of good choices. We ate lunch there, two days in a row. We thought the food was super good, but it may also have to do with eating meals with good friends; everything just tastes good when you are laughing and having fun.

Inside, the owner told us when renovating, they found these old beams, and the original straw and wattle construction, and they decided to leave it – it really adds to the interior atmoshpere:

The food was really good, and the restaurant staff was very accomodating about our picky style of ordering. They had two sandwiches, a Reuben, made with corned beef and sauerkraut, and a Rachel, made with turkey breast and cold slaw. I asked if I could have the Reuben, but made with turkey breast, and they did it as if it were no inconvenience at all. I love it when a restaurant treats my requests with respect, instead of huffing and puffing about how no, it isn’t possible.

Before we started, we ordered cups of the Lobster Bisque, which I am sad to say was so delicious that we ate it all up before even thinking about taking a photo.

My Reuben/Rachel:

What you can’t see much of on our plates is the green beans with pecans; you can’t see them because they disappeared so fast. As good as our meals were, those green beans with pecans were divine.

The Ahi Nicoise Salad (YUM!):

The Pork Barbecue (AdventureMan)

A shrimp and fish dish:

One big guy among us ordered both the spinach salad and the sausage sandwich, and ate every bite, they were both so delicious:

The food was so good, we could only drink coffee afterwards, no room for dessert!

June 4, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Eating Out, ExPat Life, Food, Living Conditions, Local Lore, Road Trips, Travel | , , | Leave a comment

Hilarious Qadaffi E-mail

Those who come by here regularly know that I have a niece who is not only a professor of Arabic culture and studies, but is also beautiful and funny and adventerous. I had no idea she was so well connected, LOL. Thank you, Little Diamond, for contributing this wonderful scam e-mail to the HT&E collection. Read and weep!

My name is Saif Al Islam Gaddafi, the son of the present president of Libya. I am contacting you for an urgent assistance.

As you can read and see in the media, my family is presently undergoing tough time in the hand of the masses due to his long stay in power as the president of Libya for over 40 years now. Although there is no way you can satisfy human being, my father has done so many things to better the life of our people unfortunately they never appreciated his effort instead it resulted in calling my family bad names.

The International community has reached a resolution for immediate seizure of our assets both in US and the UK which the have already done and many other sanctions but it can’t affect our financial statue in the world. But as you can not predict tomorrow the say that is while I decided to reach you for this assistant hoping it will be top secret and you should avoid the media

I want to request your humble assistance to receive a total sum of €22m.
I will not give you details of the fund now because of security reasons but just have in mind that the fund exit in one of the African countries.

You will receive this fund directly and keep it safe or invest it in any business of yours till this saga is over then I will get back to you on how the fund or profit will be shared. By the special grace of Allah nothing will happen to me.

If you are ready and will keep it top secret and avoid the media contact this email address (aarifqasif@hotmail.com ) the details of where the fund exit and how it will be transferred will be made known t

I know you may have little fear on you but it is risk free.

I know you will be in hurry to reply me but due to what my family is facing now and security reasons I will not be responding ! ! ! ! ! ! !.
All you need to do is to contact my representative with the email given to you and tell him that you received an email from Saif Al Islam Gaddafi and that you are willing to receive the fund.

Assalamu ‘alaikum
Saif Al Islam Gaddafi

Little Diamond, that’s the best laugh I’ve had all day. 😀

June 3, 2011 Posted by | Africa, Fund Raising, Scams | 7 Comments

Richard’s BBQ in Birmingham, Alabama

The iPhone was made for road trips. We used to kid each other “if we had an iPhone right now, we could look up . . . ” and now we have one and we do!

It got us flawlessly to the Marriott Residence Inns we favor, even those hidden away, miles from the interstates.

We also found we could enter “BBQ restaurant off I-459 Birmingham” and Boom! There it would be! We found Richard’s that way, and it was our favorite kind of place, not a chain, and full of people who live and work in the area.

This is what it looks like inside, and although there is a train that runs around the top of the restaurant, it is not a noisy train, and after a while, you don’t even notice it.

The food was excellent. I had the barbecued Grouper – and my first ever fried green tomatoes. I discovered I love fried green tomatoes.

AdventureMan had ‘vegetables.’ For strict vegetarians, warning: ‘vegetables’ in The South often contain shreds of meat, and meat fat, usually pork:

We resisted the desserts, but barely . . .

Gotta love those iPhones!

Here are some excerpts from the menu:

Prices were great, service was excellent. When I first ordered, I was told that they were already out of fried green tomatoes, so I ordered the grilled asparagus, and got another sorry, they were out of that, too. I ordered something else – I don’t know what – and when the food came – I had fried green tomatoes! It’s a miracle!

June 3, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Eating Out, Food, iPhone, Road Trips, Travel | 2 Comments

Nutcase in Pensacola

This is from today’s Pensacola News Journal following up on a story yesterday where a man in a truck shot up a seafood vendor with an AK-47 because the seafood vendor was out of crawfish. Now, the guy claims the laws don’t apply to him; he is a ‘sovereign citizen’.

It’s humbling. I used to read the Kuwait and Qatar papers, and found all kinds of strange behaviors I thought were hilarious, people who didn’t think the laws applied to them.

In Kuwait, they say “Kaifee Kuwaiti”. I think it’s pretty much the same thing; I’m special and I don’t have to obey the conventions and rules and laws.

But most people in Kuwait aren’t carrying AK-47’s . . . .

A manic shooter peppered a busy Ensley retail strip with assault rifle fire Sunday evening because a local seafood market ran out of crawfish, investigators said. (From yesterday’s PNJ)

Suspect’s beef goes beyond lack of crawfish;
Suspect in shooting claims sovereignty

Written by
Travis Griggs

Today’s PNJ Follow-up story:
Larry Wayne Kelly, the man arrested for blasting an Ensley seafood market with an AK-47 assault rifle fire Sunday, had ties to the anti-government “sovereign citizen” movement, Sheriff David Morgan said.

He also has filed dozens of bizarre lawsuits typically associated with the movement’s followers in the local court system.

“As best we can tell, they’re a fringe group — to put it kindly — and they don’t recognize the authority of the federal government,” Morgan said.

“This is the first time they’ve popped up on our radar. You want to write them off as an oddball fringe group, but when weapons and drive-by shootings are involved, you need to set up and take notice.”

Kelly, 42, is accused of speeding through Ensley, opening fire on a seafood restaurant and leading deputies on a car chase before crashing and being arrested. He’s jailed under $575,000 bond.

He is accused of calling the L&T Seafood Market on Pensacola Boulevard 11 times and becoming “incredibly irate” when an employee said the store didn’t have crawfish. At one point, he got out of his truck and fired numerous shots at the storefront.

After the rampage, Kelly told deputies he was a sovereign citizen and did not have to follow the law or obey law enforcement officers.

According to an FBI report, the sovereign citizen movement is composed of extremists who believe that even though they live in the United States, they are separate, or sovereign, entities.

They believe they can declare independence through an obscure legal process, after which they don’t have to pay taxes and are not subject to U.S. laws or courts.

They often refuse to obtain Social Security cards or register their vehicles, and they won’t carry driver’s licenses or use ZIP codes.

Kelly’s truck had a homemade license plate when he was arrested.

Followers attempt to claim their sovereignty by filing a blizzard of specifically worded legal paperwork with various government agencies and courts. Kelly has filed numerous such documents.

At first glance, the paperwork looks routine, but closer inspection reveals bizarre legal language and obscure references to outdated maritime law.

Followers place particular emphasis on capitalization and punctuation of names in the belief that the variations refer to separate legal entities.

In 2009, Kelly filed a 30-page document with Escambia Circuit Court, claiming that “Larry Wayne Kelly, a real man,” “LARRY WAYNE KELLY, a corporate entity,” and “Larry-Wayne: Kelly, Personam Sojourn and People of Posterity” are different things.

Kelly’s paperwork went on to claim hundreds of items as personal property, including fuel tanks and farm machinery. It also claimed intangible concepts, such as “all rights to exercise dominion over the earth,” as property.

One page titled “Attention and Warning” outlined penalties for government agencies violating Kelly’s supposed property rights. Penalties he cited included $2 million for denial or abuse of due process, $2 million for placing an improper garnishment on bank accounts, and numerous others.

The documents appeared to have been generated with a prepackaged “tool kit,” which can be downloaded from various websites, or copied from books written by supporters of the movement.

Scott Schneider, a special agent with the IRS, said such schemes have no legal basis and are common attempts to avoid paying taxes.

“The bottom line is the courts have regularly held that the movement, and those that participate in it, are wrong and there is no legal basis,” hesaid.

Schneider said he’s made serious attempts to decipher the legal language and references in the paperwork but hasn’t been able to do so.

“Besides the fact that some of the words exist in the English language, there is nothing legitimate about the schemes,” he said.

June 3, 2011 Posted by | Civility, Community, Cultural, ExPat Life, Florida, Kuwait, Law and Order, Living Conditions, Pensacola | Leave a comment

The Mainstay in Saxonburg (Pennsylvania) B&B

Part of the sheer exhilaration of our recent trip was the three day stay at The Mainstay, In Saxonburg. It didn’t hurt that all the rooms were taken for the same wedding party, and that we all got along so well. Three of the four couples were friends who had gotten to know one another when we all lived in Doha, Qatar, together, and the fourth couple had visited in Doha, so we all had that in common, as well as our friendship with the wedding family.

We got there early, and thought we would just find out what time we could check-in, but the house manager, James Stanek, welcomed us right in. We has reserved the Safari room, mostly because I really wanted AdventureMan to be happy about being on this trip, and the room was really a lot of fun.


Even the bathroom had lions and giraffe, carried out the Safari theme. The rooms were immaculately clean, always a good thing, and the beds were comfy with really good sheets. We all slept great.

The best part about the Mainstay was that it was a very welcoming B&B. While it is elegantly and tastefully decorated, you don’t get the feeling “don’t touch!” “don’t sit here!”, quite the opposite. We often gathered in the library; watched the news, all us nerdy geeks and our computers keeping up with the world first thing in the morning, coffee cups in hand. One day it rained, and the library was a great place to just hang out while we figured out how to spend the day. AdventureMan spent some time reading in the gathering room, close enough to join in if there was a lively conversation; far enough away to be able to read without breaking concentration.

For me, one of the best parts, too, was the house dog, Buddy. I’m an early riser, and I like to get my exercise early in the day so I can slack off the rest of the day. (Actually, exercise tends to help me not slack off; it gives me more energy.) Buddy was always polite, never pushy, but when he heard the word “walk” he was right there for me, eager to keep me company. There is just something wonderful about having an eager dog to walk, as he checks out all the fascinating smells in the neighborhood.

The Mainstay in Saxonburg is a short drive north of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and minutes away from Armstrong Farms, a party site for weddings, family reunions and gatherings of all kinds.

June 2, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, Doha, Events, ExPat Life, Friends & Friendship, Interconnected, Living Conditions, Road Trips, Travel | 1 Comment

A Year’s Supply of Kleenex from Kuwait and Mrm.

When we returned from our roadtrip to the Doha reunion and wedding in Pittsburgh, I found this waiting for me:

Yes. Yes. Yes, you see it correctly. A year’s supply of oud-scented Kleenex from Kuwait. I am guessing these are the ones sent by my friend Mrm . . . and oh, what a laugh it gave me. Mrm, it’s the little things that count, and it is your big-hearted generosity that matters, sending me FIFTEEN boxes of oud-scented Kleenex. I just can’t stop laughing, it is so extravagant and so sweet, and just exactly what I wanted. Mrm, I think this is your doing, and thank you.

I only met up with three bloggers, and Mrm and her friend were two of the three. It was an equally funny beginning, meeting up at the Starbucks in Fehaheel and each of us thinking we had been stood up because we were at different Starbucks. Soon after, they came to my eyrie in Fintas, and what great times we had from then. 🙂 I would have missed a whole layer of life in Kuwait had I not met up with Mrm, but – as those who know Mrm know – she has a way of getting what she wants, and making everyone around her glad at the same time. I had so much fun with you and Chirp, and I learned so much from you.

Thank you, Mrm. For everything. 🙂 I will think of you more than a thousand times as I use this Kleenex. Thank you. 🙂

June 1, 2011 Posted by | Blogging, Character, Communication, Community, ExPat Life, Friends & Friendship, Kuwait, Living Conditions | 9 Comments

Mileage Makes Me Smile

We just got back from our road trip. This time we took my little Rav4 since I barely put 5,000 miles on it this last year. We put 2255 miles on it, and (Ta DA!) we got an amazing 28.814945436888241 miles per gallon during the trip, even counting all the in-town travel we did in Pittsburgh (yes, photos and write-up to follow, first we have to get unpacked and I have to get some laundry started.)

Back a long long time ago, when I was in 6th grade, my parents took us out of school for a road trip, and my teacher gave me several assignments I had to do while I was gone those two weeks. One assignment was to keep track of the mileage, the gas consumption, and to figure the miles per gallon. (I also had to keep a daily journal, and to see how many different state license plates I could find while we travelled.) I’m such a geek, keeping track of gas mileage has fascinated me ever since. Cars do so many things better than they every used to. Nearly 29 mpg makes me smile.

Travel over the Memorial Day weekend also made us smile. We expected horrendous traffic and found calm, rational driving everywhere we went, even through the larger cities. . . it was heaven.

I love road trips. I get time with my husband, I have him all to myself and as we drive along every now and then he will start talking and – after all these years – I will learn something new about my husband. Someone makes the bed I sleep in and irons the sheets. Someone fixes my meals, and I get to eat what I want. I get to see new things and take a few photos. This trip we got to spend time with a very special group of friends we grew close to in Doha . . . What’s not to love?

May 31, 2011 Posted by | Adventure, ExPat Life, Road Trips, Statistics, Travel | 5 Comments

Islamic Architecture from YouTube

I still get e-mail from I Love Qatar.com and even though I no longer live in Qatar, I love their e-mails, I love hearing about what is going on in Doha socially and culturally, and I love this fresh, enthusiastic group of people who promote having fun and learning more about Qatar.

In today’s e-mail was a reference to this lovely video collection by Mballan which I recommend you watch when you have a few peaceful moments to enjoy it – he – or she – has found some magnificent sights, and the collection is beautiful. I only wish more of the selections were identified; I could recognize several, but far from all. Enjoy . . .

May 30, 2011 Posted by | Arts & Handicrafts, Beauty, Building, Community, Doha, Entertainment, Qatar | 1 Comment