Long Term Care for The Aged: Hidden In Plain Sight
One of the most amazing things that happened to me while I was living in Doha was a conversation I had with a group of Qatteri and Palestinian women. We were talking about our summer plans, and when it was my turn, I told them I was going back to the US to take care of my Dad while my Mom had a knee replacement. They all looked at me in stunned silence, and I wondered what I had said wrong.
“You do this?” one of them finally asked me, “You take care of your parents?”
“Yes, of course,” I replied, not understanding her puzzlement.
There was a burst of excited chatter I couldn’t follow, and then one of the younger women said to me “but we NEVER see this on TV.”
Things have probably changed by now, with all the cable stations available, with Lifetime and a broader spectrum, but what they think of as America is Dynasty and – well, think of what your favorite programs are, and then imagine an alien culture watching and trying to figure out your culture from what you watch. If you are living with the aliens, they way we portray our own culture on television and in movies is appalling!
Long story short, most adults want to stay independent as long as possible. They never want to be a burden on their sons and daughters and grandchildren. I am willing to bet that this is almost universal. For one thing, from the point of view of the aging, if you live with someone else, you know you will increase their work load, and if you go to a facility, you lose a lot of options to choose. Being able to have someone to come into your own house allows you to remain independent as long as possible. If you live with one of your children, you still get to have home-care, which relieves a lot of the burden on those with whom you are living.
Here is an AOL Health News article on a ‘hidden’ provision of the new health care act which will make it possible to keep our elders at home longer. Believe me, this is a very good thing, if you have ever dealt with a rehab facility, or a residence for the aged.
Health Care Reform Will Impact Long-Term Care
From AOL News: HealthCare
Robert W. Stock
Contributor
(March 26) — As health care reform became the law of the land this week, a huge bloc of Americans with a unique interest in the outcome sat watching on the sidelines.
The 49 million people who care for older family members were hidden in plain sight, as usual, quietly shouldering a burden that so often takes a heavy toll on their finances and their physical and emotional well-being. Many of them — I know a few — are opposed to the new health care law, even though it includes one of the most important steps ever taken to improve caregivers’ lot, especially those of the middle-class persuasion. Of course, hardly any of them are aware of that.
The Community Living Assistance Services and Supports Act, otherwise known as CLASS, provides for a national insurance program to help cover the cost of long-term care — something 70 percent of people over 65 will need at some point along the way. The premiums will be much lower than those for private plans, and you won’t get screened out because you’ve already had some health problems. Once vested after five years, enrollees unable to care for themselves will be able to claim cash benefits for as long as needed.
Joe Raedle, Getty Images
A health aide helps a patient at his home in Miami. The new health care reform law could “transform long-term care” and make it possible for more patients to stay at home, said the chief of the National Council on Aging.
If you’re rich, you don’t require much financial help with long-term care. If you’re poor and can no longer fend for yourself, Medicaid pays the bills, often at a nursing home. For the rest of us, long-term care — at home or in an institution — now requires that we, or our caregivers, choose from among some unpleasant options.
We can spend down our retirement savings until we’re eligible for Medicaid funds. We can protect our savings by taking out expensive long-term care insurance — it costs my wife and me more than $5,000 a year. Or, depending on how dependent we are, we can throw ourselves, or be thrown, on the mercy of our families.
My friend — I’ll call him Frank — was a retired lawyer and in great shape until four years ago. He had just turned 90 when emergency surgery laid him low for months on end. Then his sight and hearing began to go. “I’m one of the lucky ones,” his wife, Helen, told me. “His mind is fine. But he can’t get around on his own — he falls, even with a walker. He can’t make a cup of tea or shower by himself.”
For now, Helen can afford to hire an aide for a few hours a day to help with Frank and allow her to get out of the apartment. “James gives me a life,” she said. The future looks darker.
Surveys show that 90 percent of Americans want to age at home. Frank is no exception, but he never signed up for long-term care insurance. “If I couldn’t keep taking care of him, I don’t what I’d do,” Helen said. “If he went into assisted living, it would use up all our money. It’s very scary.”
CLASS, one of the legacies of the late Ted Kennedy, offers caregivers and care recipients another option. “If it’s successful, if a large enough number of people sign up, it will transform long-term care,” says James Firman, president and CEO of the National Council on Aging. “It will create a market-based economy for keeping aging people at home.”
That’s an important “if,” since the program, by law, must be self-sustaining. Premiums will generally be collected as part of workers’ payroll deductions unless they opt out. The younger the worker, the smaller the premium.
There is a vicious circle built into the current arrangements. Many caregivers must hold down a job and maintain their own separate family household while also watching over an aging parent. That kind of pressure can have consequences.
In recent studies, workers 18 to 39 years of age who were caring for an older relative had significantly higher rates of hypertension, depression and heart disease than non-caregivers of the same age. Overall, caregivers cost their companies an extra 8 percent a year in health care charges and many more unplanned days off.
In other words, the strains of family caregiving can hasten the caregiver’s need to be the recipient of care.
CLASS bids to crack if not break that vicious circle. Its benefits would make it much simpler and less expensive for families to make sure Mom gets the support she needs to be able to spend life’s endgame where she wants — in her own home. Good news for Mom, and good news for the future health of her caregivers.
In the last few days, I’ve conducted a poll of a dozen friends who have been closely following the health care reform debate. I wanted to find out how much they knew about CLASS.
Not one among them had even heard of it. It somehow seemed fitting that this major program, just like the caregivers themselves, was hidden in plain sight.
Publix Helps Us Cook At Home
Through blogging, I became a fan, and then in the way things happen in this wonderful virtual world, a friend of another blogger, John Lockerbie, who writes about many things, my favorite of which is Islamic design. He writes about the architecture, the boats, development in the Gulf, and behind the blogs, we have had our own correspondence.
Recently he commented on the post I wrote about how American health problems are mostly self-inflicted, and could be turned around with proper diet, exercise and preventive visits to the doctor to deter the serious illnesses from showing up. He sent me a reference to a speech made by Jamie Oliver, when he won the TED prize, on changing one small thing in the modern world – teaching us to cook once again in our own homes instead of eating out, eating highly processed, highly salted, highly sugared and highly fatted foods.
There is a Florida chain of supermarkets called Publix, and they are marvelous. Publix is making it easy for people to cook at home. They have a program where they do cooking demos, give out the recipes, and have all the ingredients gathered in one place – at the same price as throughout the store, just located conveniently in this one place – to encourage people to cook at home.
All the ingredients for several recipes:
Close up:
The signage:
Pick a recipe!
I find I am enjoying cooking a lot more here, where shopping is so easy and everything looks so good. Oh yes, and the prices are so low!
Tawash Restaurant
We didn’t end up at the Brussels. As we walked into the souks, we smelled a whiff of grilling meat and decided we wanted Arabic food while we could get it. We walked up and down and decided this was the night to eat at the Tawash.
The Tawash is gorgeous. Somebody put a lot of thought into it. You can eat outside, along the walkway, or outside on the balcony, or outside on the upstairs terrace. Or you can eat inside, in a private dining room, or in a large dining room that can be separated by tent-like hangings that drop down between tables. It is beautifully thought through.
We chose the balcony – we wanted to be outside, but I don’t like to eat right out on the street, with people walking by and oogling my food.
We started with hummus and baba ghannoush, served with hot hot bread:
And then we had two great dishes, a traditional Kepsa (mensaf in Jordan) which is rice cooked with delicious spices and, in this case, chicken:
And a shrimp dish, the shrimp marinated in yoghurt, then fried, accompanied by fried vegetables, sort of like tempura – the batter was very light:
And we finished with strong, grainy coffee:
If you have special guests in town for only one night, this would be a great place to take them. It is a beautiful building, it has character and charm, the food is very good, the service is attentive without being intrusive, and it has a kind of magic, a uniqueness that sets it apart from the chains of restaurants also in the souks. If the weather allows you to sit outside – do so. Part of the charm for us was the great parade of humanity passing by as we conversed and ate. It’s an altogether lovely restaurant.
A Great Day in Doha
Yesterday, I had a great day.
Most of my boxes are packed. Many addresses are changed. I know what I will take in my suitcases. The Qatteri Cat has a reservation. All the little details, by the grace of God, are falling into place.
So I could relax for a day.
I hit the pool with my long-time (I did not say OLD!) exercise buddy, and oh, that felt good! We swam, we exercised, but mostly we talked and laughed.
Joined up with another friend for coffee. Took a few minutes to shower and fix up, then treated ourselves to a Doha delight, where photos are forbidden:
Normally, and astonishingly, in the Doha Museum of Islamic Art, photos are not only allowed, they are graciously encouraged, so I was surprised and embarrassed to be told I was not allowed to take photos in the magnificent Pearl exhibit. It truly is a fabulous display. My favorite part was not the pearls, but a very very beautiful old pearling box, complete with inlay, and compartments, and a set of pearl size sifters. I know, I am weird. I would rather have that than the pearl of great price. I would worry about the pearl being stolen. The box would give me pleasure every single day, for it’s beauty and its usefulness. I have one, a plain one, and I am delighted to have it, but seeing this glorious pearl box also gave me joy.
On Mondays the special exhibit is free, but we still had most of it to ourselves, and could peruse the treasures at a leisurely pace.
I really love this place; I love the building, the spaciousness, the graciousness and serenity of it. I love that it attracts people, and that huge numbers can be in the building and you never know it.
This is what I call a phone call with a view:
Tourists can’t resist snapping:
It’s a great place for photographs:
One of these guys told me that he could see when I was younger, I must have been very beautiful. I am guessing he thought I would take it as a compliment, LLLOOOLLLL.
Which Bank????
Don’t you think the name of the bank might be relevant to this story? Don’t you think it might alert other bank customers to check their statements carefully? Why on earth would the name of the bank be concealed if it is stealing from its customers?
Bank accused of embezzling customer funds
Web posted at: 3/15/2010 5:58:51
Source ::: THE PENINSULA DOHA:
In a rare and unprecedented incident, a local bank faces accusations of embezzling customer funds and committing financial irregularities in managing the accounts of some of its customers. Noting that there were some deductions in their accounts without being notified and without such deductions being valid in the first place, the affected customers reported the violations to the bank which could not convince them of the nature of the deductions or the transactions shown in their accounts. The case was reported to the judicial authorities and was ordered to be investigated via the public prosecution. After investigations the public prosecution decided to file charges against the bank. The case was referred to the court of first instance.
First Woman Judge in Qatar
I am delighted to hear that Qatar has appointed its first female judge. I have to points of contention with this article. First – while I want women to have the same opportunity to be judges as men, I do not believe that because they are women, they can solve family rows better. I believe some female judges may be better than some male judges, but I don’t believe women will be better with family issues just because they are women. Women have agendas, too.
Second, one female judge does not fill a void. It sets a precedent. It breaks new ground. It IS a great and wonderful thing for Qatar.
It does not fill a void. Take all the judge positions in Qatar, and divide them by the percentage of females in Qatar – say like 50%. The void for female judges is equal to 50% of the positions. The void is not yet filled. Filling that void has just begun.
A woman judge can solve family rows better, say female lawyers
Web posted at: 3/13/2010 6:15:3
Source ::: THE PENINSULA
DOHA: Family courts in Qatar which hear marital disputes and claims for the custody of children from divorced or separated couples were in bad need of women judges, so with the appointment of Sheikha Maha Mansour Al Thani as an assistant judge, the dream has come true, say prominent women lawyers.
Being party to marital disputes or disputes involving the custody of children, women can be better understood by judges from their ilk.
So with Sheikha Maha having been appointed as judicial assistant, the void has been filled, said lawyer Neda Al Sulaiti.
She, however, clarified that she did not mean that women should be appointed judges only in certain courts.
“Women are capable, so they can be judges in all types of courts. It is another thing, though, that family courts here were particularly in bad need of female judges,” she told a local Arabic daily.
According to her, Sheikha Maha’s appointment to this elevated judicial position is a tribute to the rising clout of Qatari women. “They carry out in an excellent way whatever responsibility is assigned to them,” said the lawyer.
Qatari women are highly qualified and talented. They are in the ministry and the Central Municipal Council (CMC). So it was high time they were represented in the judiciary as well.
When women can be good lawyers why they cannot be good judges, she argues.
Buying a Car the Civilized Way
“Did you know USAA has a car buying service?” AdventureMan asked me. Well, yes, sort-of, but I’ve been not wanting to think about buying a new car with all the house-buying stuff and paper-filling out stuff and packing stuff and making lists.
On the other hand, every day I have to rent a car is money down the drain.
“I’ll just check it out,” I thought to myself.
It was so easy. You go online and tell the car buying service where you live and what you want to buy. They send your name and phone number and e-mail (since I don’t want car salespeople calling me in the middle of the night because they don’t understand about time zones, I only gave them my e-mail) to dealerships who participate in USAA’s program.
USAA also sent me a list of car dealerships in my area and a Certificate for me to print with their agreed upon price. That simple. The certificate prices were significantly lower than anything I had been offered at the dealership I visited, and these were guarantee.
Within hours, three dealerships had e-mailed me. I chose the closest, worked with a WOMAN to get what I wanted at the price I was willing to pay, and not one item more. She was courteous and helpful and respectful! She got me everything I wanted. She named an out-the-door price that I could live with.
The only downside is that the dealership is 35 minutes away, in Fort Walton Beach. The upside is that they have been known to deliver, and 35 minutes just isn’t that far. Like from Fintas to downtown Kuwait City in heavy traffic, or from my house to the Ritz Carleton in Qatar. I can live with that.
Yes. Yes, Daggero, you guessed it right, I am buying another Rav4, one with brakes that work. I’m not scared off by Toyota’s troubles. It’s like eating in a restaurant that has just re-opened after being closed for health violations; you know it’s never going to be cleaner than it is right now. 😉 I love the way the Rav4 is sort of small, I am sort of small, too. I love that it turns on a dime, and that I am high enough to look over most of the traffic, but small enough to park in a tiny parking spot. It’s an SUV, but a modest SUV, with good mileage per gallon, and a great record for reliability and repairs.
Here is what I love about this transaction. I did my homework. I know what I want. I know what is a reasonable price to pay. I am getting a better price than I expected. There are no games – here’s what I want, here is what I am getting and here is what it is going to cost, and that includes title and licensing. How cool is that? I feel like when you do business like this, everyone is a winner.
And a shout-out to Marisa at Quality Toyota at Fort Walton Beach for making the process easy and non-threatening and civil. Working with her to buy my new car was a pleasure.
Arab Communities in the USA
You never know what you are going to find until you start to look for it. I’ve googled all kinds of combinations of “Arabic food Pensacola FL” without finding much, other than a mezze plate at a vegan restaurant here and there. Still searching . . .
Meanwhile, I found a map of Arab concentrations in the USA – why knew?
Community Place type % Arab
Hamtramck, MI city 6.3
Dearborn, MI city 4.6
Bridgeview, IL village 4.2
Baileys Crossroads, VA populated place 3.6
Oak Park, CA populated place 3.3
Prospect Park, NJ borough 3.2
Chicago Ridge, IL village 3.1
Topeka, IN town 2.8
Buttonwillow, CA populated place 2.8
Lackawanna, NY city 2.8
Haledon, NJ borough 2.6
Moodus, CT populated place 2.5
Burbank, IL city 2.4
Hickory Hills, IL city 2.2
Justice, IL village 2.1
Stickney, IL township 2.0
Dalworthington Gardens, TX city 1.9
Dunn Loring, VA populated place 1.9
Lodi, OH township 1.7
Cassville, WV populated place 1.7
Coldwater, MI city 1.6
Orland Hills, IL village 1.6
Oak Lawn, IL village 1.5
Palos, IL township 1.5
Orchard Lake Village, MI city 1.5
Worth, IL village 1.5
Wallace, NC town 1.4
Water Mill, NY populated place 1.4
Seven Corners, VA populated place 1.4
Alsip, IL village 1.4
Lewisburg, WV city 1.4
West Buechel, KY city 1.4
Piney Point Village, TX city 1.3
Wesley Chapel, FL populated place 1.3
Coldwater, MI township 1.3
Fairview, NJ borough 1.3
Coitsville, OH township 1.3
Dale, IL township 1.2
Dearborn Heights, MI city 1.2
Palos Hills, IL city 1.2
Worth, IL township 1.2
Colma, CA town 1.2
Lavallette, NJ borough 1.2
Lake Providence, LA town 1.1
Miami Lakes, FL town 1.1
Amity, NY town 1.1
Melvindale, MI city 1.1
Oak Brook, IL village 1.1
Shady Hills, FL populated place 1.0
Temple Terrace, FL city 1.0
Milton, OH township 1.0
Park Ridge, NJ borough 1.0
Sources: 2000 Census, U.S. Census Bureau; The Arab Population: 2000, U.S. Census Bureau; Harvard Encyclopedia of American Ethnic Groups, ed. Stephan Thernstrom; Ancestry: 2000, U.S. Census Bureau (June 2004); ePodunk
Mapping by Daniel Shorter
This is from a website called ePodunk
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