As It Snows . . .
Catching up with the news, I was looking at the Thursday Kuwait Times when I came across a photo. I am not going to print the photo in my blog, but if you want to look at it, or one like it, you can see it at Yahoo News, just click here on the blue type.
The photo of the execution, titled Iran hangs 13 on a single day is extraordinary enough. I don’t think we print those kind of photos in American newspapers. Maybe in the tabloids; these photos are considered disturbing. I know they disturb me. This one in the Kuwait Times has big white balls in it and the caption reads: QOM, Iran: Three Iranian drug traffickers hang limply from the nooses as it snows in a square in this central city yesterday.
I remember cutting out a similar one from a paper in Saudi Arabia when I lived there. It didn’t have a photo, but the article was about the Taliban hanging of a convicted man in the stadium in Kabul. It stated the man was wearing a blue sharwal khamis. There was no mention of why this man was hung, of what he was convicted.
The Yahoo version of the same hanging of 13 states: Three Iranian drug traffickers hang limply from the nooses after being executed in a square.
To me, the mention of snow falling as people are executed, of the executed man seems . . . maybe poetic? Maybe some way of softening the horror? I don’t know. It’s not something we would do. Bad news is left bare, without a lot of dressing it up. I would love to get your input on this. For me, it’s a different way of thinking.
Insha’allah
One of the best things about moving between cultures as often as I have is that I get a chance to learn how much I don’t know. One of the things I have learned living in the Middle Eastern countries was how little I knew about my own religion. Knowing how little I knew sent me into a bible-study program that I look forward to resuming one day when I am living back in the US, or someplace that offers it – Bible Study Fellowship. They do an in-depth study of different books, or sections, of the bible, very serious, and you learn so much.
Apart from that, the church with which I affiliate, the Episcopal Church, has daily readings – I’ve mentioned this before – you can see them yourself by clicking on The Lectionary over in my Blogroll, and then going to the Daily Office Readings and clicking on the right week. Once there, you have to click on the day of the week, and it will take you to the readings for today.
One of the readings for today, the New Testament reading, made me smile:
James 4:13-17,5:7-11
13 Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a town and spend a year there, doing business and making money.’
14 Yet you do not even know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.
15 Instead you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wishes, we will live and do this or that.’
16 As it is, you boast in your arrogance; all such boasting is evil.
17 Anyone, then, who knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, commits sin.
7 Be patient, therefore, beloved,* until the coming of the Lord. The farmer waits for the precious crop from the earth, being patient with it until it receives the early and the late rains.
8 You also must be patient. Strengthen your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is near.*
9 Beloved,* do not grumble against one another, so that you may not be judged. See, the Judge is standing at the doors!
10 As an example of suffering and patience, beloved,* take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord.
11 Indeed we call blessed those who showed endurance. You have heard of the endurance of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful.
In the first section, verse 15 tells us that we should be like good Moslems, never saying we are going to do something without adding “if God wills it,” or (big grin) in Arabic, “Insha’allah.” How often we hear Westerners saying “None of this ‘Insha’allah!’ I want you to DO it, dammit!” I never looked twice at this verse until I had lived in the Middle East.
In the second part, there is a message just meant for me, maybe not for you, in verse 9. It tells me not to grumble against another person, of I will be judged by the same standard. Hmmmm, now there’s a scary thought!
Christian vs Christian
This is just purely sad. You can read the whole story at BBC World News.
Unholy dust-up at Nativity church
Members of rival Christian orders have traded blows at the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem, with four people reported wounded in the fray. Greek Orthodox and Armenian Apostolic priests were sweeping up at the church following the Christmas rites of the Western churches earlier in the week.
Reports say some Orthodox faithful encroached on the Armenian section, prompting pitched battles with brooms.
Intense rivalries at the jointly-run church can set off vicious feuds.
The basilica, built over the grotto in the West Bank town that is the reputed birthplace of Jesus Christ is shared by Roman Catholic, Greek Orthodox and Armenian religious authorities.
Palestinian police formed a human cordon to separate the battling dark-robed and bearded priests and deacons, said to number about 80, so that cleaning could continue.
Read the rest of the story here.
Christmas in Kuwait
There are Christmas trees in Kuwait, in the malls, in the stores, and Santa and his reindeer are everywhere. I can remember other Christmases – in Saudi Arabia, in Jordan, in Tunisia, in Qatar – when you never knew if this was a year when Christmas would be allowed or not.
For my family and friends not in Kuwait, you would be amazed what you can find here. I am just showing a tiny bit of what you can find these days in Kuwait:
“Marionette . . . or Moron?”
This was sent by a good friend, 8 minutes by Keith Olbermann, ending with “Mr. Bush, you are a bold-faced liar.” This is from his December 6th broadcast.
Magnificent Concert
There isn’t much I ask of AdventureMan, he is busy supporting us and feathering our nest for retirement. When I ask, he is such a sweetie. I had asked about last night – there was a very special concert I wanted to hear. He took me, even though he had an early flight out this morning and hadn’t packed, hadn’t even picked up his shirts from the cleaners.
It was so totally worth it.
The Al Ahmadi singers did their “Holiday” concert at the SAS/ Al Hashemi Ballroom. It was wonderul, and moving, and a great way to get into the spirit of the Christmas season. I love that ballroom, it has so much character, even though the outer reception area smells a little moldy – what can you expect, right on the sea like that? The place is clean, and has an amazingly elegant feel, with it’s fabulously intricate wood parquet floors, it’s ship-light inspired chandeliers, it’s coffered ceilings, it’s heavy wood staircases to the upper deck/balcony. It has a great ambience.
Thanks be to God, in Kuwait, the Al Ahmadi singers can even sing excerpts from The Messiah, have readings about the meaning of Christmas, and celebrate the birth of the tiny baby Jesus. Can you see my great big grin? Even the memory makes me happy.
The orchestra supporting the chorus, under the direction of Joanna Kowalla, was also amazing. Very very good. Lucky Al Ahmadi singers, with such a great director, Richard L. Bushman. The soprano soloist, Vernica Grmusa, took our breath away with her excellence. The alto soloist, Jessica Olson, had a couple of really fun numbers, composed by the concert conductor’s wife, Harriet Petherick Bushman.
It was just the evening I needed, exquisite music, performed with spirit and excellence, in an atmosphere of joy. It was a total wow.
Just a couple reminders to people who may not have a lot of experience with attending concerts:
1) Turn off your cell phone. It is selfish and rude for you to be talking on your phone. I don’t care if your friend is lost, I don’t care. The conductor is making the SECOND announcement now about turning off cell phones; he means YOU. Everyone around you is glaring – can’t you see? Turn off your cell phone.
2) If you are late, and if they allow you in anyway (in most places you have to wait until an intermission or pause) enter discretely and find seats quickly and SIT DOWN. The key word here is discrete. Most of us are excited about the concert and eager to hear the music. Your grand entrance is lost on us. We don’t care how good you look, we just want you to sit down. Waving to all your friends, attracting attention to yourself makes us want to kill something – watch out. It might be YOU.
In spite of my complaints, above, the concert was so overwhelmingly good that even these minor rudenesses didn’t spoil the overall joy of an evening particularly well spent. Bravo, Brava, Al Ahmadi Singers, orchestra and soloists!
The Big Fight
AdventureMan and I had a big fight last night; I made it worse because I wouldn’t fight. It only made him angrier that I laughed and walked away.
Too much information? Sometimes, most of the time, a fight isn’t about what it seems to be about. When you have been married a LOOOONNNNGGGG time, you learn, thanks be to God.
AdventureMan is jet lagging, and working too hard. He takes all his responsibilities so seriously. He needed to go to sleep. And that is exactly what he did. Right after dinner, he fell asleep. The Qatteri Cat (he told me this morning) knew something was up and took two of his babies in to AdventureMan to make things better.
We were both up early this morning, laughing. He came up with a wonderful idea for date-night tonight, one of my favorite restaurants, and then . . . (if we can stay awake) we are going to watch this:
I know ya’ll have seen it, but we haven’t, and it just came out on DVD last week in the US.
Dubai Rape Case Update
Here is an update on the case where the 15 year old French boy was kidnapped, taken to the desert and raped, and then the accused said it was consensual. The parents took them to court – and two have now been convicted; the third has yet to be tried. The doctor who examined this boy told the boy he was a homosexual, that there were no signs of rape. The parents were outraged, and pursued the case.
You can read the entire BBC Story HERE.
Emiratis jailed for raping youth
A court in Dubai, in the UAE, has jailed two men for 15 years for the abduction and sexual assault of a 15-year-old French-Swiss boy.
The men, one of whom is HIV positive, took the teenager to the desert and raped him at knifepoint.
The victim’s mother, Veronique Robert, says the authorities lied about the defendant’s medical status to hide the fact that Aids is present in the UAE.
“Fifteen years is nothing for someone who knew he had Aids,” she said.
A lawyer for the family said they would appeal against what they saw as a too-lenient sentence. A juvenile court is trying a third suspect in the same case.
The defence had claimed the victim had consented to sex and had lied to the authorities.
Treatment missed
Ms Robert has been campaigning to change the law in the United Arab Emirates to recognise homosexual rape as a crime and for more openness about HIV and Aids.
Shuw’i: Night and Day
By day:
At false dawn:
I can only hope they are having a fantastic catch for the upcoming holidays; imagine, The Big Eid and Christmas falling in the same timeframe. How wonderful!
Surviving Family Functions
As my Mom and I were driving along, on our way to Thanksgiving dinner, we ended up having a surprising conversation about family Thanksgivings. I was telling her how I grew up hating Thanksgiving, that Dad and I always had a big fight because he was mad at me for taking a book along, I was meant to be interacting with the family.
I think parents forget how noisy and intimidating family events can be. I don’t know about your family, but in most families there are a few weird ducks, or maybe they get weirder when they all get together. Taking a book and finding a quiet place to read helped me survive these events. As I grew older, and got to know family members on an individual basis, quiet, one-on-one – I learned that there were several of them I actually liked a whole lot. There is one aunt who is probably my main role model, and one cousin who is one of those I would trust with my life secrets.
Mom doesn’t remember the fights, she doesn’t remember my taking a book. “Why would you?” she says in absolute incredulity. Mom never met a party she didn’t like – she is a very social being, to her very core. I still feel her hand at my back, slightly pushing me into the room with a big smile pasted on all our faces, saying “Mingle, girls, mingle!”
I love being a grown up. I love being able to say “no,” and I even love the growing grace to face situations I hate and get through them. I love meeting up with fellow introverts in other cultures and learning, that under the skin, we all face a lot of the same problems.
“Ach! Birthday parties!” exclaimed my German friend, a fellow Mac-user and graphics designer. “I would love to be you, to live somewhere else, and never have to attend another birthday party!” In my little village, where, by the grace of God, they included me in everything, I came to understand what she meant. On a person’s birthday, every woman in the village brings at least one cake, and oh man, these cakes are special. Most are loaded with cream, whipped, and imbued heavily with alcohol. Every person must take a slice of almost every cake (and my body doesn’t like all the fat in cream and rebels) and you sit for hours having the same conversation you had at the last birthday party. I was just an outsider in the village, not even a family member, and it was hard for me to say no. The force of tradition has so much weight!
My Kuwaiti friends also occasionally confide their impatience with expectations that you will show up regularly and stay – maybe at grandma’s every Friday for the mid-day meal, maybe there are a whole bunch of weddings all at once and you end up attending several nights in a row and feeling like something the cat dragged in the next day . . . I think every culture has these expectations, and every culture has those who thrive in a social environment and those who – like me – don’t.
Oh, if you saw me now, you would THINK I am in my element. I have learned how to fake it! My social Mother’s training has paid off; I LOOK fluent in social events. Underneath, however, I am the same old person who does best one-on-one.
AOL Healthy Living (you can read it HERE has published a list of tactics for surviving the inevitable family / group functions you can’t avoid.
1. Expectations
Holidays are all about expectations. Will mom love my gift? I hope we do a group sing-along. You want the holidays to be perfect, but cut down the fantasy. Instead, think about what you want to get out of it all — relaxed Thanksgiving with your in-laws or a New Year’s Eve that doesn’t end with a hangover.
2. Arrive Late, Leave Early
The traditional seven hour marathon — drinks, dinner, presents, television — is too much “together time” for most families. Shortening the party can make a dramatic difference. And if you’re in for a sleepover, take breaks from the crowd. It’s as simple as walking around the block or crawling into bed early with a good book.
3. Don’t Drink too much
Many people use the holiday as an excuse to eat, drink and be merry to excess. Rarely a good idea around family. Alcohol, in fact, can be a real serious problem in a lot of households. When the drinking gets out of hand, all the old animosities come out to play, and hostile, regrettable or embarrassing things are said — or worse.
4. Presents
You spend hours selecting the perfect present for your sister and she hands you … a candle. And a re-gift at that. Newsflash: Not everyone’s as thoughtful as you are. The best solution here is to discuss gift-giving — how much to spend, what you’d like — with her and the rest of the clan beforehand.
5. Don’t Get Sucked into the Craziness
Holidays can cause otherwise sane adults to revert to their worst childhood selves. And that’s not accounting for dad’s sarcasm and mom’s incessant pleading. If you find yourself falling into the same old roles, do (or say) something to derail that train. Don’t get sucked into the craziness again.
6. Focus on the NOW
Your big bro was mom’s favorite. Okay, but after 30-odd years, that’s not going to change. Focus on the now. You’ll have a much better time if you practice forgiveness and try to accept family members as they are, even if they don’t live up to all your expectations.
7. Seek Out Those You Love
Your relatives spend the holidays in the mall. That’s not for you. Rather than sulk, seek out the people you really love and miss, and ask them for a little face time. Also, urge your host to set smaller tables so you could sit with your favorite cousin without listening to your uncle bluster on all night.
8. Things Won’t be Perfect
Don’t deny it: You’re thinking you have to be an ideal daughter in-law and hostess; make the consummate green bean casserole and buy the best gifts. Not gonna happen. Stop trying to be perfect and comparing yourself to others, and realize that all you can do is try your best.
9. Focus on the Positive
In the end, think about exactly what you’re celebrating here. Joy. Caring. Sharing. Think about your family gatherings as if you were in church, synagogue or a mosque. You wouldn’t be bickering with or judging others, right? Okay, maybe you would. But let’s keep that on the DL — at least while you’re all together.
And I would add one more – 10. If you are one of the more social types who LOVE family gatherings, have a little pity on the introverts, who find large gatherings a little overwhelming! Try to get a little one-on-one time with them, try to have some opportunities for quiet conversations.
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