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Go For the Bloat
It is breathtaking in its audacity. In a report from CondeNastPortfolio.com we learn of a reverse approach by Carl Jrs. / Hardee’s – going full out towards mega-caloric burgers.
This post is dedicated to Mark, at 2:48 the b-side who is on a quest in Kuwait for the ultimate burger. I am afraid he is going to – literally – eat his heart out.
It was a patriotic statement that went a bit too far afield: an attempt to create the “ultimate picnic burger.” Called the Fourth of July Burger, it was tested last summer at seven locations by the West Coast fast-food chain Carl’s Jr. and consisted of a huge beef patty topped with pickles, ketchup, mustard, potato chips, and a hot dog. Stacked high and loaded with fat and calories, it was the food equivalent of the national anthem played through a sousaphone, a perfect distillation of a peculiarly American form of balls-out, postmodern gluttony that, at least outwardly, we’re all supposed to be ashamed of right now.
Yet for all its pomp and glory, it didn’t quite work. When John Koncki, director of product development for Carl’s Jr., talks about it now, he comes across a little wistful. It tasted really good, he says, but the name and the concept proved too much for the testers. “Sometimes,” the earnest Koncki says, “some of the sandwiches are so unique that consumers can’t wrap their heads around them.”
The uniqueness isn’t the only thing that’s hard to get your head around. During the past few years, CKE Restaurants, the parent company of Carl’s Jr. and Hardee’s, has employed an audacious go-for-bloat approach that defies just about everything you’ve come to assume about the business of modern fast food. (See nutrition data for CKE franchises and other fast-food chains.) In an age when other chains have been forced to at least pretend that they care about the health of their customers and have started offering packets of apples and things sprinkled with walnuts and yogurt, Hardee’s and Carl’s Jr. are purposely running in the opposite direction, unapologetically creating an arsenal of higher-priced, high-fat, high-calorie monstrosities—pioneering avant-garde concepts such as “meat as a condiment” and “fast-food porn”—and putting the message out to increasingly receptive consumers with ads that are often as controversial as the burgers themselves.
You can read the rest of this article, and similar articles, by clicking HERE.
Election Year Joke
Lord Have Mercy
An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession.
Like many young men, the boy didn’t really know what he wanted to do, and he didn’t seem to concerned about it.
One day, while the boy was away to school, his father decided to try an experiment. He went into the boy’s room and placed on his study table four objects.
A bible
A silver dollar
A bottle of whisky
And a playboy magazine.
‘I’ll just hide behind the door’, the old preacher said to himself.
‘When he comes home from school this afternoon, ‘I’ll see which object he picks up.
If it’s the bible, he’s going to be a preacher like me and what a blessing that would be!
If he picks up the dollar, he’s going to be a business man, and that would be okay, too.
But if he picks up the bottle. he’s going to be a no-good drunkard, and Lord, what a shame that would be.
And worst of all if he picks up that magazine he’s going to be a skirt-chasing bum.
The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son’s foot-steps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room.
The boy tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table.
With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them.
Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm.
He picked up the silver dollar and dropped into his pocket.
He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink while he admired this months centerfold.
‘Lord have mercy.’ the old preacher disgustedly whispered.
‘He’s gonna run for Congress.’
Kuwait Driver’s License
“oh, I can’t,” I was telling my friend, “I have to go get my driver’s license today.”
“I had a funny thing happen,” she responded. “When I went, I didn’t understand the guy too well and he said something like ‘how long do you want it for?’ and I said ‘three years’ and I got one for three years!”
“You’re kidding!” I said. “I’ve been having to go every year!”
It doesn’t make sense, but you just never know in Kuwait. Every year for two years now I have had to go get my eyes tested and get a new license. But you never know, maybe her company has some other agreement, and she gets a three year license. Some things you just can’t worry too much about or it will drive you crazy.
So I went and took the 30 second eye test and later that same day my husband brought home my new driver’s license – good for TEN years.
If I had known I was going to get a ten year driver’s license, I sure would have made sure they used a better photo than the one my sponsor provided them. AAAARRRRGGGHHH.
Packaging
Look closely at these Reindeer. The chocolate ones look a lot like Easter Bunnies to me, if fact, I am betting they are pretty much the same except for the wrapping.
Taking Issues to the Paper
Here is where this story started: Corruption at the Morgue.
You have to wonder what is going on here? Both parties are now taking their cases to the press. It’s interesting. It should be easy enough to determine whether the morgue conditions are modern or not, whether the morgue has the equipment it needs to determine blood alcohol content, drug levels, blood infections (you would want your medics and coronors to know if they are exposed to TB, HIV, Hepatitus, etc.) but all this is aside from the accusation that autopsy results and cause of death are being manipulated to prevent successful prosecution of some who commit crimes, and to implicate some who do not.
The female coroner’s accusation of sexual harassment may not even be an issue – does Kuwait have a law against sexual harassment? I would think the courts would be overwhelmed if there were such laws in place! If there is no law against sexual harassment, can you call it assault, and prosecute?
Morgue chief hits back
Published Date: March 17, 2008
By Ahmad Al-Khaled, Staff Writer
KUWAIT: The director of Kuwait’s morgue refuted accusations by a female coroner of departmental wrongdoing and false reports during a press conference yesterday. Department director Eid Bousalib labeled the female coroner Dr Nawal Bousheri a “problem employee.” The director argued that his department is transparent, noting “We have a department of quality control which monitors all our procedures.
He, instead concentrated his statements on attacking Bousheri. Reciting a litany of offenses including failing to show up for work and complaining about the lack of promotion, Bousalib painted Bousheri as a disgruntled employee simply lashing out via the media.
She stopped signing in and out of her log book and declined overtime hours and with that we sent a memo to the administrative department regarding those issues. At that time she was not assigned any cases. On two occasions, one for 46 days and another for 21 days where she never signed-in.” Bousalib pointed out, “This happened in 2007, long before she complained in the media.
He also noted that she applied for a promotion and was rejected and in response, “She placed another complaint with the Civil Service Commission that was investigated and declined…She was still unsatisfied and complained in the administrative courts in 2007 on the same issue (her promotion) and it was rejected,” he said.
Addressing Bousheri’s accusations, Bousalib said that male doctors examined male corpses and that women examined female corpses. “That is totally wrong, women examine women and men examine men – even the doctors have separate offices (male and female sections)-If you examine our overnight shift lists, we always have a male and female doctor on shift.” Bousheri alleged that male doctors would be present in the same examining rooms where female coroners examined female corpses. She said the result was in app
ropriate behavior regarding the corpses.
Bousheri also claimed that coroners falsified reports at the request of police. Bousalib rejected the claim. “It is impossible to doctor the records. An administrative person, no matter his rank, has no authority over technicians and what the technicians write on their reports is what they are responsible for in the courts,” he said.
Regarding accusations of poor sanitation, sterilization of equipment, and bad smells in the state morgue, Criminal Investigation Deputy Director Brigadier Dr. Fahad Al-Dousari said, “The ventilation system is modern. The morgue was authorized and approved by the British Royal College and Kuwait University and is up to international standards.” Notably the facility was denied the approval of the British Royal College prior to 2001 but after upgrades, subsequently received the approval.
The department, which includes a wide variety of sections such as a criminal laboratory, forensic medicine section, and a crime scene officers section, has been in operation for 50 years. In 2001 Kuwait launched the identification DNA laboratory which was the first such lab in the Middle East and Arabian Gulf region.
Earlier slanderous rumors regarding Bousheri’s mental state had been leaked to the press. Bousalib declined to comment on the rumors, noting “She is still an employee and a colleague and we do not interfere in her personal life.” Kuwait Times could not confirm the rumors. Dr. Bousheri is still employed at the department, but Bousalib would not confirm if she was still receiving cases.
Female coroner retaliates…
Published Date: March 18, 2008
KUWAIT: Female coroner Dr Nawal Boushiri has retaliated against accusations hurled at her by morgue director Brig Eid Bousalib in Sunday’s press conference. She pointed out that she was waiting for the minister of interior’s nod, especially since he was aware of all the misdeeds that took place at the criminal administration. She met him twice and he has given the director the go- ahead to defend himself, thus making him both the opponent and the judge. She asserted that she has documents to prove the viol
ations that took place in the autopsy room and other departments at the administration.
However, she said that she has reservations about making them public now, since the case is sub judice. She expressed astonishment at the fact that the director avoided the sexual harassment topic, emphasizing that the issue has deeply troubled her and undermined her position at the administration
She said that the head of the department is a dentist; universally, the post is reserved to a doctor specialized in general medicine and surgery. A dentist’s knowledge is limited to the teeth.
My complaint is still being considered by the court and I have a letter authorized by the Civil Service Commission stating that the minute the post becomes vacant, I have the right to take charge.
The director said that the autopsy room is a modern one and meets international standards. I want to say that the room is a hall, that has two tables for inspecting bodies, without any kind of partition. The ventilation system is poor. The equipments used are substandard. This administration department smells foul whenever a body is present in the autopsy room. Authorities should verify this matter.
She said that there have been cases where lab reports indicate that the blood and urine samples taken by the administration were not that at all. Further some reports state that the urine sample was substituted with some ‘liquid.’
Boushiri went on to say, “The director feels that it is not important to decide the dose of drug in the bloodstream. I say it is of extreme importance especially in cases decisions have to be made whether the dosage was part of treatment or not. It is usually the drug overdose that causes death.
Whatever has been said about my commitment to work is baseless. For all the years that I worked at the administration, I stopped signing the attendance register only after the director started sexually harassing me. I did not sign the register for several months before he ordered that my salary be stopped on 16th September 2007. I don’t know why he chose this date in particular.
MacDonalds MacKrisby
This is for my stateside readers. Wherever you go, except for Syria, there seems to be a MacDonalds. The funny thing is, in different countries, they have different specialties, things you never see in the USA. For example, while we lived in Qatar, they had a special called the MacArabia, which was kind of like a local fast food, but on a more Western bun. It was no where near as tasty as the local equivalent, but I think they add things to the menu to appeal to people forced to eat there when the kids insist. I am only guessing; I can’t even remember the last time I had anything from MacDonalds.
In Kuwait, they have added a new sandwich, the MacKrispy, a breaded fried chicken thing, sort of like a great big dry chicken nugget. Because Arabic does not have a “p”, the literal translation of the word (you can see it down by the little golden arches) is MacKrisby.
Trivial
Any time I start to get all puffed up about readers complimenting me on my blog, I just take a look at the search terms that bring them in.
You know, I would love to think it is our discussions about political and social issues, the books I review, the travel destinations I recommend, the human experiences we share . . . I would love to think that.
It just isn’t the truth. Here is what brings the most people to look at Here There and Everywhere. It is truly, truly humbling.
Qatteri Cat Sinks in Sleep
The Qatteri Cat loves to find new places to slumber down. Today he is on the back of one of the loveseats, literally sinking as he sleeps. I am watching to see how far he will sink before he will rouse himself and get out of the crevice.
Eventually, he will scramble out, and being a cat, he will be embarrassed, but he will pretend like it never happened.
Drugs for Women
OK, friends, just so you will know – this is HUMOR. A friend sent this in an e-mail, and after I stopped laughing, I decided to share it with you. Remember – if it is too good to be true, it probably isn’t true!
NEW DRUGS FOR WOMEN
DAMNITOL
Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.
EMPTYNESTROGEN
Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn’t wait till they moved out!
ST. MOMMA’S WORT
Plant extract that treats mom’s depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.
PEPTOBIMBO
Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.
DUMBEROL
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.
FLIPITOR
Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.
MENICILLIN
Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, ‘You make me want to be a better person. ‘
BUYAGRA
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree.
JACKASSPIRIN
Relieves headache caused by a man who can’t remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat
ANTI-TALKSIDENT
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.
NAGAMENT
When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him, without opening your mouth.







